Allow, Me, Gentle Reader
To illuminate an aspect of life in South Canada: the humble tow company. These are business organisations who specialise in recovering, or towing away, vehicles for various reasons. Illegally using another person's property to park upon is one reason, and you could populate a sub-Reddit with all the accounts on Quora about awful neighbours who got towed. Art!
No, it's not a tow truck, but it's a lot more dramatic, isn't it?
ANYWAY the registered owner of a vehicle has to go to the impound area of the tow company, with proof for release, and they have to pay a fee. If the vehicle has been impounded for more than a few days then the fees increase. You're talking about several hundred dollars to get your wheels back. Art!
Now a tow truck
The tale, as narrated by Original Poster, concerned a car that had run into a telegraph pole whilst the driver was drunk. It had sat in the storage lot ('car park' for the non-South Canadians) for a month before a snotty 16-year old showed up with $10 and said he wanted his car back.
OP barely restrains laughter and says that the total fee comes to $468. Nor is Snotty Young Punk the registered owner, so there's no way he's getting the car back. After a bit of to-and-fro SYP leaves.
OP rashly thinks that's the end of it.
How wrong he was.
Shortly afterwards he takes a call from SYP's mother, who immediately denies that her darling young son was drunk, disputes the fee and informs OP that he's a liar. She will be there shortly, she warns.
O my, Karen alert! This is when OP informs readers that there is ALWAYS a police officer on-site, due to the threats and violence that occur on a regular basis*. Art!
Not long after Snotty Young Punk shows up, trailing his mother and a man in a suit, who turns out to be Karen's lawyer. The lawyer goes through all the paperwork in detail and explains there's nothing he can do; the car had been impounded a month ago, everything has been done correctly and his hands are tied. Karen threatens to fire him. Then she rounds on OP, asking why the vehicle has been impounded. SYP lies about this, at which Karen demands the fees be dropped and the car returned.
Enter the police officer, whose professional curiousity has been aroused. He asks SYP for his licence, which he conveniently doesn't have on him.
No problemo, this is where today's awesome digital technology comes into play, because the cop can check on SYP's exact status on his laptop.
O my! No licence. Needs to take a driver education course. Fines to pay for the drink-driving offence.
Karen silently reads what's on the laptop monitor and quietly pays the fee, as well as for the car to be towed home, as the cop stated it's not fit to be driven. The trio leave OP's office, and as soon as the door closes Karen bawls out SYP both for lying and making her look stupid (although she was clearly a significant contributor to the latter), that he'll be paying her back for years and she slaps him around the chops. Her lawyer curtly informs her he will never be working for her again and leaves. Karen drives off before SYP can get into her car, so he has a nice long exercising walk home. Art!
Like this but much longer.
One of the more stupid things Karen asked was how her son had been getting around if his car was impounded by the towing company? Uber, I imagine, Karen. Walking? Bus? Bicycle?
More Of The Soft White Underbelly
No! Not the precursor to Blue Oyster Cult. I mean the other side of the South Canadian Dream, as described by Geography King on his Youtube channel. Be advised that he doesn't post these locations to mock or gloat, he seems genuinely stunned that such pockets of deprivation can exist in the world's most prosperous country. Art!
His next class is of rural poverty, rather than urban and the first example constitutes what you might call "Appalachia", covering south-west Kentucky and into West Virginia. Unlike the relatively condensed urban ghetto, this area covers several counties and crosses state lines. Art!
You can see his point. If this photo was in monochrome you'd think it was taken during the Great Depression. Many properties don't have running water or electricity, it might take you half an hour to drive to the nearest store or an hour to the nearest hospital. It makes for grim watching!
"The War Illustrated"
We are now onto Issue 166, late 1943 at about just this time of year. In case you weren't keeping up, the Axis are now indisputably losing the war, having lost the strategic initiative on the Eastern Front, and with Italy now being invaded and occupied. Art!
A lady driving a boat. Not a lot else I can say about that one. Art!
Hmmmm they're being entirely too sanguine with that title, the Allies didn't manage to seize Rome until June 1944.
Looking to the photo at upper starboard, the caption states that the advancing Eighth Army had been slowed down by Teuton demolitions, including a bridge. The Royal Engineers used a Bailey Bridge to cross the gap, erecting it in under 50 minutes.
The middle picture is taken within sight of Mount Vesuvius and shows a 6-pounder anti-tank gun going into action. That bloke lying off to the side is going to get deafened at the very least when it fires! Totally unsuitable position to put yourself in.
Bottom port shows a long column of Shermans, probably stopped for a brew.
Bottom starboard shows a 'Bishop' self-propelled gun in action. Yes yes yes, it only looks like a tank. It's a Valentine chassis, with a 25-pounder gun sat on top, encased in a big, thinly-armoured turret. Conrad not aware they were used in Italy.
"The Sea Of Sand"
The Doctor and his fellow fugitive, the bio-vore Sorbusa, are attempting to get access to the trans-mat platform they originally arrived upon.
"Did they try to kill us? Or stop us? Or alert the Warriors undoubtedly searching for us? No, they did not, for the very good reason that they hate and detest their masters more than you or I could begin to imagine."
Oh, thought Sorbusa. As a former ruler I'm being helped by people who hate rulers. And why do they hate their rulers? Because their lives mean nothing to the rulers.
"Come along, Thedoctor. We can approach the trans-mat from the sea unsuspected. Then it is but a short distance to the platform. Do you think you can operate it?"
The Time Lord rubbed his hands together enthusiastically.
"Can I? Can I!"
FIFTEEN: Unexpected Arrivals
Dominione cast an uncomprehending and worried eye over the shattered remains of the "Black Tank", keeping an equally watchful eye on Sarah Smith. Eventually he had the woman detained and the tank destroyed.
The attack on Mersa Martuba had been a complete success. Of the much-reduced garrison, only a Lieutenant and a couple of enlisted men remained. His own Camionista's suffered only a couple of superficial wounds, just revenge for their humiliation earlier that year.
Don't get cocky, mate. There's a nasty surprise waiting at Makin Al-Jinni ...
Finally -
After I post this I'm going to have to sneak down to the Co-Op and desert Edna. Because we have nearly run out of Discreet Doggy Doo-Doo Disposal Devices, thanks to all the walks she's been receiving.
* This is not a job I'd like to do.
No comments:
Post a Comment