As Is Frequently The Case Here
This one is a bit convoluted. But Hey! consider it great mental exercise, all that leaping about from once interpolation to another assertion, via a couple of analogies, the whole ending in a validation. Okay, first of all, this is nothing to do with otters, although we shall be messing about on the river. So apologies to any of you who were expecting Gavin Maxwell's finest. Art!
Otterly charming
No, you see I intend to do a little musical critique for the Intro, concerning a Beatles song we've mentioned once or twice already this past week, namely "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds", which does begin with You The Audience taking a trip downriver in a boat. We shall fondly imagine that the river in question is neither the Irk nor Irwell, which for much of their lifetimes have been little better than sewage sumps oozing towards the sea. Art!
"Human! I wish to protest about the water quality of my river."
Hence we have this evening's title. Okay, let the roasting begin!
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
Lucy in the sky with diamonds
I say - is that Lucy, up in the sky, amidst a collection of allotropic carbon?
Of course there are some fearful cynics out there who assert that "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds" is in fact all about wicked evil drugs like LSD ("Lysergic Acid Diethylamide") because of the title, which is patently rubbish. Conrad can confidently state there is no such illegal substance as LITSWD and Lennon and McCartney were just very strange people.
Motley - do NOT drop acid! Or we won't have a floor any more.
A Snarling Return To Form
Yes! Conrad tackled a Codeword in the Oldham Times, which I only occasionally purchase, meaning that I'm less cognizant (another word you didn't expect to see today) with the compilers. BUT I STILL HAVE CAUSE TO COMPLAIN! O I'm so happy I have a Codeword to be cheesed-off about. Let the roasting begin!
"SARONG": SARONG IS WRONG! There you go, I made that up all by myself, can you tell? Conrad is but vaguely aware that this is a piece of apparel, worn in the Far East? Since his knowledge of fashion on his own doorstep approximates to 0.0037%, Your Humble Scribe is quite impressed he got this one EVEN THOUGH HE SHOULDN'T HAVE NEEDED TO. Compilers, you have been warned.
"FLUMMOX": Or, to bamboozle and bedazzle. No derivation in either Brewer's or my Collins Concise. Let me assail teh Interwebz. Ah - mid-19th century, possibly derived from the Midland dialect "Flummock", meaning 'confuse'. CODEWORD YOU FLUMMOCKER! actually I quite like that and may use it again.
"ZEPHYR": No! Not the car. A gentle breeze or soft winds. Conrad knew this one because it derives from (of course - obviously!) Latin and "Zephyrus", which equally inevitably comes from the Greek "Zephuros", meaning "West Wind", and I've come across it in crosswords before.
Yes yes yes, it's the car. Try finding a picture of a gentle breeze!
That's all the objectionable words for today. Maybe more tomorrow.
You'll be lucky, mate -
Sorry, currently listening to Blue Oyster Cult's "Mirrors", their not quite successful attempt to branch out from heavy metal in 1979. And I've just been listening to "The Vigil", as written by Donald "Buck Dharma" Roeser, where he plaintively expects benevolent aliens to descend from the heavens and save Hom. Sap. Hmmmm. Well, it hasn't happened in the past 42 years. When my starship invasion fleet gets here in 247 years they won't be exactly 'saving' humanity*.
A Bascule
I know, I know, it sounds like an insult in French: "You, sir, are a bascule, and so is your mother!"
Except not really. A 'Bascule' is a variety of bridge, believe it or not, and you will have seen at least one of them even if you're not aware of it. Art!
Tower Bridge. A bridge. With towers.
Bascule bridges operate on the counterweight principle, having relatively short spans, either single or double, that elevate to a high degree, meaning that ships of any height can traverse the clear channel between them. Tower Bridge is the most famous example in the world, and don't accept any Ruffian claims that dispute this because they're wrong**. I dare say we can dig up a schematic that shows what does which. Art!
As you can see here, the counterweight is moved to pivot the bridge upwards, allowing riverine movement, before being pivoted back downwards, allowing road traffic to continue again. The famous Pegasus Bridge in Normandy, one of the first targets seized by Perfidious Albion's paratroops on 06/06/1944, is a variety of bascule bridge. Art!
Hmmmm can't help but feel this is vaguely rude
Peggy feeling a bit down in 1944. Note glider wrecks in the background - this is how close the paratroopers landed in the early hours of 06/06/1944.
Finally -
Just to keep you up to date, I went through Historic England's search results for the term "Prosecution" and no, the list did not include any details of prosecutions against cowboy contractors. Conrad might try searching newspaper articles, although this is constrained by the fact that a national paper might not have deemed it an matter important enough to mention; local papers would, but I don't know which location Noisy Gobshute's construction company were working in. Keep watching this space, this one has legs.
* More along the lines of "enslavement via mind control and uranium-mine excavation". Just so we're clear.
** Because I say so is why.
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