The Saga Of A Soggy Stroll

SIT BACK DOWN!
For yes, I am going to be harping on about Staffordshire Regimental Museum again.  If you recall, it was a dismal day on Thursday, cold, wet and raining hard, with an unpleasantly sharp wind to boot.
     However!  First we will concentrate on one of the military vehicles parked outside the museum, a Sinister-era Armoured Personnel Carrier, which, if Art will emerge from his coke-induced stupor -

The MTLB

     This is the MTLB, a vehicle capable of towing various kit to the weight of 6 tons, as well as carrying 11 infantrymen.  Here is the rear view -

Egress and ingress doors.
(Please note: padlock has been added by museum staff - the Sinisters didn't actually trap their soldiers inside*)

     There isn't all that much to give a sense of scale here, but as you can see from the camera angle, Your Humble Scribe's head is level with the top of the superstructure here, and that information card says the MTLB was designed like all Sinister personnel carriers, with only 5' 4" headroom.
     Blimey.  Conrad stands at 6' 1" and would have extreme difficulty contorting his unwieldy frame into such a confined space.  Try to imagine 11 beefy Ruffians, with all their kit, packed into this sardine tin.  Or, if you will, 11 Iraquis, out in the noonday sun in a big metal box.  B.O. a severe problem one would imagine, as would be water discipline.
     Anway, on with the walk. Art?

Art's breakfast.  You didn't think I meant something else, did you?

     Sorry about our resident Neanderthal's eating habits having intruded.  Okay, Art?

Serendipitous.  Also, wet.

     The entrance to the trenches.  The receptionist had wisely suggested I tackle the trenches first, since there was a primary school party just about to go around the museum, which was a good suggestion.  Irony of ironies, the unpleasant weather lent an air of authenticity to the whole experience.  Unsurprisingly, I was the only person present.
  Art!

Revetted trench replica

      Here the trench walls have been revetted with corrugated iron, which prevents them from collapsing in wet weather or a thaw.  In real life this wouldn't be done to much trench-line as there were cheaper alternatives like timber or chicken wire.  Plus, someone would doubtless steal the CI for constructing a shelter of their own.  Next!

"R.A.P." - "Regimental Aid Post"

     This is the R.A.P. where casualties would be initially treated before movement rearward to ambulances and evacuation to hospital facilities well behind the front lines.  The trench name is "Baker Street", which may have been a legacy created by a London unit, as the North and South Stafford Regiments hailed from the Birmingham area.

An awkward shot of the R.A.P.'s interior.

      There were also speakers dotted about the grasses, which played appropriate sounds of gunfire and explosions.  Next!

The view across No Man's Land

      That's a Teuton "Mebus" as they were named, a contraction of the whole very long Prussian phrase.  Perfidious Albion called them "pillboxes" after the - er - boxes that were used to - ah - keep pills in.  Because nothing says "Reinforced concrete fortification" like a pharmaceutical accessory.

     Incidentally, there was frequently long grass growing in NML in the real thing, because nobody bothered to go out and cut it - obviously! - especially in the war's early stages.  It was a Dog Buns! nuisance as it hid the barbed wire laid earlier, and allowed people to sneak up on you.  A cloud gas attack would usually wither and kill it all off, which might be effective herbicidally but which is also rather bad for Hom. Sap.
     Okay, that's enough of my initial encounter with trench.  We will come back to this, O by Jove, Michael Gove!

Jupiter.  A.k.a. Jove

     Let us now see what happens when a motley is fired from a torpedo tube!

     

     Wow, that Intro has taken up nearly the whole article.  I do go on a bit, don't I?**

Apropos Of Nothing -
You may not know it, but that word "Jovial" does indeed derive from "Jove", and in Holst's "Planets Suite" you get the subtitle "The Bringer of Joy".  Not only that, Ken Dodd - Art?

Ken, that is a VERY rude gesture in Turkey.

 - used to have a catchphrase of "By Jove!" before he would rattle off a stream of one-liners.  This is actually a reflection of the Roman tendency to swear on the name of Jove as a measure of sincerity and honesty in dealings with others.  Conrad still occasionally uses it as an expostulation.***

Finally -
Sticking to both the martial theme and Jupiter, here is a picture of the destroyer HMS Jupiter -

By Jove indeed

     At which point I shall cease and desist, since I want some tea and it's getting late.  

     What ho!


*  Probably.
**  There is no right answer to this.
***  Wash your dirty minds out! No, this is neither swearing nor rude.