A Morning Of Meh

I Hope That Gets People's Attention
"A Morning Of Me" would perhaps be more accurate, yet less interesting.
     It being Saturday, I forwent my usual lie-in and decanted from bed at 8:30, dithered about a little, had breakfast and then set forth for Babylon-lite (Oldham if we're being formal).  It was about time for me to get a haircut, but! -

Peppi's on the left.  The cafe has now closed down.

     Unfortunately for me, Peppi is now booking his male customers in on Saturday, and I hadn't booked.  Next appointment wasn't until 11:00, so I had an hour and twenty minutes to wait.  Meh.
     Well, making the most of the delay, I hied myself hence to the beating heart of Babylon-lite and Sainsbury's, for this is the only place you ca'n buy loose-leaf Darjeeling tea, except WHAT'S THIS?  Art!  Portray the full horror of the situation!

Tea bags!  Dog Buns TEA BAGS!!*

     No loose leaf Darjeeling, not even the branded Twinings stuff - clearly that dispute in India is either still rumbling on, or the anticipated 6 month delay in production is in effect.  Meh.
     I just checked the news via Google, and yes, the strike has been resolved, but too late to save this year's harvest.
     Mind you, I did pick up a jar of pickled ginger, pricey yet nicey.  Your humble scribe loves this stuff, and the condiment pots of it at Yo! Sushi are always empty after I've been for a visit.
     There was further bad news.  I was going to pop into That's Entertainment as it lies along the route to Sainsburys, but - no.  It's closed down.  Art?

The week before

     Another Dog Buns! moment.  The staff in there knew their music.  Meh.
     The niobium-lining to this event was that I popped into The Works, where they had scads of military history books going cheap, so let Art display The Haul.  Art?

     So, no new CDs but 6 new books, which will have to be added to the Military Book Barn.
     Oh, and to finish off, I got back to Peppi's with time to spare, and this is the end result.  Art?

Happy, happy Conrad

     Not, you must admit, a face made for smiling.
     Now, let us see if the combine harvesters move faster in first gear than the motley can run!**

 The Midas Touch
You remember King Midas?  The mythical king whose wish was granted, and who turned everything he touched into gold.  I bet Auric Goldfinger would swap places with him in a hot minute.***
     Conrad always viewed this myth with considerable suspicion.  For one thing, if you go around turning everything into gold, you're going to depreciate the price considerably.  Gold has a nominal value thanks to scarcity, so if it's as common as sand or coal, it won't be worth any more than silicon dioxide or allotropic carbon.

Thus

     I mean, it's not as if it has that many uses apart from decoration.  You can't make glass from it, nor fire a power plant with it.  So, it would behove Ol' Midey to be very sparing with what he turned to gold.
     You may also remember that Ol' Midey got all snivelly and penitent when he turned his daughter into gold, after getting thirsty and hungry because his food and drink - you're probably ahead of me here - turned to gold.
     This is because he was an idiot.  Gloves, man, gloves!  Even if they turn to gold, you'll still be protected from touching anyone or anything.

Thus

     Of course, I may be overthinking this a bit ...

When Bad Means Good
The Beeb appears to be jumping on a bandwagon that Conrad has been riding since the mid-Eighties: films so bad they're good, usually for reasons that the original film-makers were unaware of.  They have a list of 7 recommended for your viewing <ahem> pleasure, and here is the link:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/4SYrbXr2ct5SSt3mvd995qt/the-seven-best-bad-films-ever-made

     This is, of course, an utterly subjective listing.  Conrad fondly remembers watching the Channel 4 series "The Worst of Hollywood" in 1983, where Michael Medved (author of that hilarious classic "The Golden Turkey Awards") introduced and discussed films.
     So, Beeb, why are neither "Godzilla versus the Smog Monster" or "Robot Monster" on your list?


     Godzilla is clearly outmatched here.



*  I'm not going to apologise for using TWO exclamation marks here.  This is serious.
**  They can't, but the motley doesn't know that
***  A South Canadianism, but apt.