Chocolate And Guiness

No!  This Is Not About Me Binging
For one thing, as you ought to know by now, Conrad is not big on chocolate, unless it's wrapped around something interesting like turkish delight or mint fondant.  I did have one last week, but only because Laura offered it and it would be rude to refuse.
     Nor am I big on Guiness.  It looks interesting, that contrast between black and white, but the taste is faintly repellent.

The enemy, en masse

     I would drink it on a dare, or to empty the bottle when it had been opened, and that's it.
     No!  This is about a cake.  Couldn't you guess?  Art?

Chocolate and Guiness cake

    This one is from the Hummingbird Bakery Cookbook, and as I've said before, their recipes are more elaborate and fiddlier than others.  Especially this one!  I had to sieve the sugar, because it had caked in the tin thanks to moisture, and sieve the cocoa powder, because that clumps the instant you open the packet, and sieve the Guiness and cocoa mixture, as that clumped as well, and sieve the final batter, because that clumped, too.  Though I've no idea where the clumps came from that time.

A portal from another dimension?

     It was popular at work, however, as it flew off the plate.  So much so that I had to put a slice aside for Ania.  Well, not "had to", more along the lines of "a British Gentleman is always considerate".*

You're Gun-a Regret This
I have mentioned the "In Range" team before, Ian and Karl, and their - er - instructive videos over on Youtube.  You know, about melee weapons of the First Unpleasantness, and eating a Ruffian pre-packed military meal only 5 years past it's sell-by-date.
     Well, the latest bit of tomfoolery that they posted involved frying eggs.  Art?

What it says on the caption

     Karl had ordered a shipment of 'Fireclean', without explaining what it is.  From context - and Google - I discovered that it's gun lubricant.  Art?

Presto

     Our two heroes then decide to see if you can use $20 bottles of gun lubricant to - er - fry eggs.  Karl heats up a small frying pan and proceeds to do just that, and both he and Karl tuck into the eggs.
     The verdict?  Edible, if bland (and expensive).

The Trouble With Tribbles
Sorry, with First Bus.  I just couldn't resist it.  As you may know already, Conrad is engaged with a ceaseless battle against the forces of chaos, malice and evil, better known as First Bus.  I decided, after the 24 failed to turn up last week, to simply take the first bus that came, expecting it to be the 409, which I can take into Oldham bus station and then catch the 83 into Manchester.**

My hero!
No - wait - it's only a bus.  Sorry.

     Of course, since then the 24 has regularly turned up first.  It's a different matter in Manchester, because on Wednesday the 24 that turned up was not only a single-decker, it was one of the short single-deckers.  It was instantly standing room only and left loads of people at the stop.
     First Bus:  if they were in charge of inventing the wheel, we'd still be walking everywhere (although that might still be quicker ...)

Test-Driving A Teapot
Conrad's weekend routine always involves drinking copious quantities of tea, brewed in a large teapot.  Without a tea cosy this means the tea at the bottom of the pot gets cold before I reach it <sad face>.
      However!  Art?

Hay Pesto!

     Yes, this is me re-using that old photo - it's called 'recycling' don't you know and is quite the done thing - to illustrate.  Success!  Which is pretty much guaranteed, since it has no moving parts, doesn't require power and compresses down to fit in your pocket.  The last cup to come out of it was a bit stewed, to be honest, which is okay as it was still piping hot.

So!
Conrad took advantage of his cosmopolitan compatriots, Karolina (who is Lithuanian) and Damian (who is Polish), to ask about 'Kabaczki', which Google translates as "squash".  Poor Karolina was confused, as to her 'squash' is what you dilute to make a flavoured drink.  Damian was better-informed and brought up a picture on his mobile phone.  Art?

Also Kabaczki

     It transpires they are Courgettes, not some arcane variety of root vegetable only obtainable from Polski Sklep.  I may pop down into Royton later to acquire some.



*  Doesn't apply to aliens-in-disguise, though
**  This may be more detail than you were expecting, but I like to keep you, the audience, fully informed.