BOOJUM!: Deep Purple: Burn

If You Have A Good Memory -
- and recall June 2017, then you'll recall a post that was entitled "Deep Purple". There you go, that's me being honest, I could just have kept quiet about it.

A cyborg carrot. Somewhat worryingly, I thought this would be a no-go on Google.
It wasn't.

That post was about the dye known as "Tyrian Purple", which was a much-prized and very, very expensive dye. It was produced by the Phoenician city of Tyre - no jokes about wheels, please - and was produced by laboriously crushing and processing thousands upon thousands of shellfish called "Murex". Art?

An example

Here an aside. This is a bit of an experiment, as I am typing this whilst watching "The Monolith Monsters", a Fifties sci-fi thriller with an intriguing premise - the monsters here are gigantic crystals, rather than anything giant and bug-like. It'll probably slow down producing this paricular BOOJUM! but you can't hurry perfection.*
Back on track, or as much as we ever care to round here. The purple dye produced by Tyre was of a notable kind that did not fade over time, so the colour remained deep and purple. Yes, so Tyre was surrounded by tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of dead, rotting shellfish. Allegedly, you could find your way to the city blindfold, as it reeked so much.

Since no blog ever can generate a smell, use your imagination

Now, your humble scribe has a sensible solution to police and process these many tons of stinking goo: burn them! Burn the whole lot, which might generate a short-term smell but removes your long-term pong.
What's that? You wanted to know more about "The Monolith Monsters" or at least get a picture? O go on.

Being all in your face and monolityh-y

There you are. Happy - what's that? You thought this was going to be about an album by a heavy metal band, which, by AN AMAZING COINCIDENCE shares today's title? Pshaw! Get out of here, you're making this up!
Right, time to roll the motley in flour and dip it in the deep-fat fryer!

Tyre-d Out
Still no jokes about wheels, I'll have you know. The other thing that Tyre was famous for was being besieged and stormed by Alexander the Great, back in the Fourth Century BC. Alexander, who was taking a little time off from battling the Persian Empire, had made his way down the coast of what is now Lebanon and, wouldn't you know it, those pesky Tyrians refused to bend the knee.

Siege in progress

This was spectacularly unwise. Alexander had a few singular qualities: he never gave up, and he never lost a battle. Tyre thought it would be able to say yah boo sucks to Big Al' because they were a city based on an island.
I used the past tense here, because eventually the Greeks built a causeway that reached out to the island, before construction was halted. Eventually, after building a navy, the city was stormed and it did not end well for the inhabitants.

Tyre today

Conrad is reminded of a quote by General Plumer before the battle of Messines Ridge began: "I do not know if we shall change history tomorrow, but we shall certainly change the geography." And so it was with Big Al's hoplites and Tyre.

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Although you have also incurred The Wrath Of Conrad, which is something small nations and Third World dictators cringe at.
"Has he been at the cooking sherry again?" I hear you ask. Apart from pointing out that sherry is the Devil's cough-syrup, I shall explicate. Art?

Image result for elvis costello and the attractions pump it up

Mr. Declan McManus

Conrad has been around long enough to remember Elvis Costello first time round, when he and the Attractions burst onto the scene. EC is quite the talented musician, has done the odd acting gig and is a fan of Philip K Dick, too. Conrad rates him.
So! I was rendered rather grumpy when viewing television (which I normally avoid) and witnessed a car advert that utilised the above single as it's soundtrack.
Except I cannot for the life of me remember what model the car was.