Congratulations!

Remember Goldfinger?
     "No, Mister Bond, I expect you to die!" as spoken by Auric Goldfinger.  Imagine the opposite of that.
     Remember "Phoenix Nights", when Dave Spikey's character dances across Chorley because his biopsy came back negative?  Imagine that also.

     A touch of that today, gentle reader.  Conrad sat on his glasses and broke them - a natural conclusion given his size and weight - and thus had to venture forth to Specsavers, where he needed to undergo an eye test.
     Splendid.  No trace of diabetes, glaucoma, high blood pressure or "floaters". 
     Glasses still a bit crap, though.

Multiply x2 for full effect.

OWWWW!
     Today Conrad was tidying his Upstair Lair, looking to render it affable for the Gas-Pipe Engineer* who will be coming to fix leaking pipes later this year, before this year becomes 2014.  Later on he feels that there are small stones in his sock - takes it off, shakes it, moves on.  Still later he feels the return of small stones - are they fans of mine? - and takes off Crock to shake it out.  Yet later still the annoying, irritating feeling returns and Conrad wonders about soles and feet and spikes and -

That yellow dot is the bottom of a drawing pin

There you go. That's Mike Lloyd's "The London Scottish In The Great War" next to it, if you care to know.

LIghts!  Action! Music!
     Just to ensure you regard BOOJUM! with artistic awe, I am currently listening to Andraas Schiff playing the first four of Beethoven's piano sonatas - with Mssr Schiff's commentary about each sonata.  This is culture with a capital "C", six miles high.
     After that, we will be moving on to "The Raid" - an Indonesian film about police  SWAT teams attacking a hi-rise filled with armed villains.  Rather less elevated.
     After that, we will be moving on to "Revelations", a first draft manuscript by - oh! by Conrad.  What a surprise!

Conrad's fan base.

Righto, time to go.  That zombie novel - ah but you already knew!

*Potential name for our Darling Daughter prior to birth.