Which Is The Name Allotted To Taking Edna On Trotties
Principally because there are no distractions in terms of books, comics, DVDs, Codewords, Cryptic Crosswords, remaindered food needing to be consumed before it turns toxic and explodes or that Pagoda Five SASCREW team tramping across the roof.
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| MAKE SURE YOU WEAR SOFT SOLES! |
Thus, I observed - I know because they leave bootprints in the snow - a taxi being driven into Woodland Park, which we here at The Mansion know as 'The loop' as that's just what it is. Art!
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| The loop in question |
Which got me thinking - always a worrying issue - about whether 'Taxiing' is the only common word in English with two 'i's not at the end. I mean, there are CROCII, GENII and RADII, but they're not exactly in common usage.
Which, of course - obviously! - led me to wonder about the word TAXI itself. Get ready for a lesson in some French. Art!
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| The hay-munching variant |
This is a French fiacre, a four-wheeled horse carriage which was hired out by customers, and which had a 'Taximetre' mechanism installed, which calculated the payment, or 'Tax', per 0.6 miles (or kilometre if we have to use the horrid metric term),. They were in existence long before the internal combustion engine and motor vehicles came into play. Art!
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| The petrol-swilling variant |
This is the British taxi-cab, as they came to be known. Allow me to boost the Word Count and use my Christmas present: "A car, usually fitted with a taximeter, that may be hired, along with the driver, to carry passengers to any specified destination." This led to the existence of 'TAXI RANK' also known as a 'CAB RANK', where taxis would queue to be hired. Heaviest usage Friday and Saturday nights.
Back to the 'Collins Concise English Dictionary' and I'm delighted to see the word 'TAXIING' present. Once again: 'To cause an aircraft to move along the ground under it's own power, especially before takeoff and after landing.' Art!
That's Ginger, flying the Polikarpov biplane, shooting down a Nationalist aircraft. There's a lot to unpack here that I'm not going to unpack - aren't I a stinker! - because I remember a scene from the novel, where Ginger has stated to the Glaswegian Jock McLannock, a pilot in the Republican air force, that he, too, is a pilot. They take a plane out onto the taxiway ("A marked path along which aircraft taxi to or from a runway, parking area, etc.") and Jock begrudgingly admits, on the taxiing alone, that Ginger is indeed an accomplished pilot.
ANYWAY whilst still on the subject of taxis and aircraft, we have the Brylcreem Boys 'CAB RANK' of later Second Unpleasantness. This was an array of fighter-bombers stooging around the battlefield at 10,000 feet, loaded for bear and waiting to be called down upon hapless Teuton stubble-hoppers by a Forward Air Controller. Art!
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| Someone downstairs is in for a very, very bad time |
With that internecine guff out of the way, let us look at TAXI in the field of entertainment, which is what I originally intended this Intro to be about, instead of diverting off on a dozen different tangents. Sue me if you want. Art!
Conrad has never seen an episode, only occasional clips, which means my judgement on how good or bad it was is a little skewed. It did last for five seasons and win Emmys, so it was doing something right. You may recognise the cast above: Judd Hirsch, Danny de Vito, Marilu Henner, Tony Danza, Andy Kaufman, Christopher Lloyd and Randall Carver. Of whom some went on to bigger and better things. Not Randall, they wrote him out after the first season.
Art!
This gawky 14-year old is Vanessa Paradis, who had unwonted fame and success with - you may be ahead of me here - "Joe Le Taxi", a song about - you may be ahead of me here again - a taxi driver. Not a fiacre in sight. Here's a Comment from Youtube.
Tempus fugit, mate, tempus fugit.
If you've been following the blog for any length of time, you'll also be aware of Conrad's love for 'Taxi Driver', which is nothing to do with the Robert de Niro film - an excellent if grim early outing for Martin Scorsese - and everything to do with Korean television series. Art!
Now you know the Hangul for 'Taxi Driver'
The premise is interesting: a philanthropic billionaire gives people who have been wickedly wronged a chance at revenge/justice/mercy <delete where applicable>. If they choose Option 3, nothing happens. If they choose Option 1 or 2, then his organisation, operating a taxi service as a front, swings into action. Their team consists of the morally ambiguous business owner, Jang Sung-Chul; mechanics and artificers Choi Kyung-Ku and Park Jin-Eon; accomplished hacker Ahn Go-Eun; and whipcord lean ex-707 Special Mission Group Kim Do-G, their enforcer. Art!
That's Kim. attaching the battering ram the mechanics designed, to his luxury taxi. He can batter anything less than a tank off the road with minimal paint scratches, and put it back into the boot with no tools needed.
I could go on, as the taxi and it's driver are iconic across the globe, but I feel like holding back for a later blog. I bet you can hardly wait.
Whoops, long Intro, let's wheel on some images quick smart. Art!
Speaking Of Korea -
In order to make room in the fridge, Your Humble Scribe heated up the 'Bento Wasabi Korean Fire Chicken' and ate it last night. Merely licking the fork I stirred it with incurred spicy distress, so I emptied what was left of the sour cream into it. Art!
It was STILL Dog Buns hot, to the point that eating it was a challenge over mouth-melting meat magma, or the bin. Conrad, greedy scoffer that I am, managed to finish it off. Rather to my surprise, my insides are fine.
Pink Pupper Place Provided
Edna in her fluffy pink dog nest, as she's a female dog. The 'B' word is not allowed to apply to her. Since the rest of the clan have returned, Conrad is packing up his dog-sitting duties, which have not been that onerous, to be honest. Venturing forth into wind and rain for trotties has been the worst of it.
Talk About Timely, Coincidental And Apt
Conrad was looking at his news items to see if any had hideous depictions of Donnie Dorko looking as if he was ten minutes past his appointment with The Grim Reaper. What did I find? Art!
I know nothing about this so allow me to dig a little.
Aha. So, a music festival featuring artists I've never heard of - allow me -
Arapu, Chaos In The CBD, Priku, Us Two, NTS tastemaker Moxie
- which was advertised and promoted as being in 'Greater Manchester' is in fact close to the Welsh border at Bolesworth Castle. Near Chester. Which is not Greater Manchester at all. Art!
Tickets cost £80, and the minimum cost for a bus ticket back to Manchester - if there are buses running when the festival ends - is another £30. Or you could book accommodation near Chester, adding another £100 to the cost. Or you could sell your tickets and not bother going to an event organised by chiselling scammers featuring artists nobody has ever heard of (at least in The Mansion).
Oooh! Oooh! Another One!
As you should surely know by now, BOOJUM! is pretty much the opposite of a fan club for the Saggy Sepia Senile Sackbut, which makes me baffled at all the MAGA cult members who Follow me on Twitter. Perhaps they are all FSB officer bots, keeping abreast with our satirical takes on life in Mordorvia and creative insults about Putinpot?
Maybe not. ANYWAY I have another unflattering photo of Pumpkinhead. Art!
He appears to be suffering from a prolapse of the mouth, an image so disgusting I laugh at the fact that you cannot now unsee it.
Finally -
Conrad not recalling any of the 'Falling Skies' second season episodes so far. Old age and gin taking their toll.
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