Maltese Cross

Don't Worry

I know we here at BOOJUM! sometimes breach our code about indulging in Politics and Current Affairs, but rest assured we are not going to get into the third exclusion, that of Religion.

     Having said that, I dimly recalled that there was a relevant page in my "Brewer's Dictionary Of Phrase And Fable" which featured illustrations of the various types of crosses that there are.  Art!

     Twenty-one of them.  In an item on the page opposite, it mentioned that there are 285 different types of cross used in heraldry, and I pity the poor soul who had the thankless job of cataloguing all of them.  There are only 12 used with regularity, these being SIT BACK DOWN! the: 1) Ordinary cross; 2) Cross Humetté; 3) Cross Urdé; 4) Cross Potent; 5) Cross Crosslet; 6) Cross Bottonné; 7) Cross Moline; 8) Cross Potence; 9) Crossy Fleury; 10) Cross Patté; 11) Cross Fleché; 12) Maltese or Eight-Pointed Cross.  Art!

     Here's a Teuton warplane of the First Unpleasantness, probably a Fokker Triplane to judge by it's surfeit of wings, and what is it adorned with?  Why, the Maltese Cross.  This sigil gradually fell out of favour as it took ages to paint onto a plane, and was replaced with the Balkan Cross, which you can look up yourselves if curious.  Art!

     The Maltese Cross is derived from four barbed arrowheads with their points meeting in the centre, and was the symbol of the Knights Of Malta.

     Now, you and I both know that the intro to an Intro is usually a tangent to the real story, which is what's happened here.  You see, I was reading the stories of a Youtube Reddit titled "When You Finally Got Revenge On The Bottomhole From School" and came across a British tale, which is unusual as they are normally all South Canadian.

     Our Teenaged Narrator - hereafter OTN - was on a school music tour abroad, with his party composed of 15-year olds.  Art!

A generic school with 6th form

     This party included a bully who had been picking on OTN at school for years, along with a couple of servile minions.  Bullying Bottomhole - hereafter BB - decided it would be amusing to throw things at OTN whilst travelling by coach.  OTN collected all the thrown objects, patiently waited and then threw the whole collection back at BB.  Strangely enough, BB did not appreciate this returns policy and punched OTN on the arm, after which OTN punched them, as hard as possible, in the chest.  BB stifled a tearful response.  All of this drama was conducted out of sight of any teachers, so there was no intervention.  Art!

     BB and servile minions rashly carried on their feud and raided OTN's room, stealing food, which success seemed to go to their heads, as they tried to raid the room again.

     Surprise!  OTN and his compatriots had barricaded the door shut, snuck out over the balcony and sought out a teacher, who caught BB and minions (servile) trying to break the door down.

     Oooops.

     In a stunning turnaround, BB's room was searched by the teaching staff to recover OTN's stolen goods.  They found alcohol - illegal as they were underage - drugs - also illegal just to be clear - and a completely destroyed toilet.  Not to mention the room had been completely trashed.

     Damage caused = £5,000.  Thus BB and minions (servile) had to pay for the damage and I'd love to have overheard the phone conversation they had with their parents.  They were all suspended and banned from any future trips.  Art!

     This all took place on Malta, meaning that the bullies couldn't exactly be sent home to mama and papa.  Were the Maltese cross?  I should say so!

     As proof that BB and slavish cohorts were not very bright, they tried to attack OTN and friends on the last day of the tour, when OTN and company had hired pedaloes.  Given how aggressive and stupid they had already been, it was a given that the teaching staff would be keeping a weather eye on them, so a teacher on a jetski instantly intervened.  Art!

     

     Matters back in This Sceptred Isle once they returned from Malta got even worse for BB and cohorts (slavish).  Being in the 5th form at school, they would normally expect to move into the 6th form and continue into Further Education, studying for 'A' levels.

     Not any more!  They were banned from the 6th form.

     Ooops again.  You see, education in the UK is compulsory up until one turns 16.  After that, if you apply to a 6th form or FE college, it is entirely up to them as to whether they accept you or not.  Having "I was banned from my 6th form" on your college application is not going to sit well.

Actions, Meet Consequences

You may have recently heard about Ruffian tankers and freighters 'accidentally' severing undersea cables in the Gulf Of Finland.  The third of these events was the cutting of an undersea powerline between Finland and Estonia, by the Ruffian vessel "Eagle S".

     The Finns were not impressed.  Not one bit.  In fact, they were extremely angry.   Art!

     I plan to watch this later as it's 30 minutes long, and we'll see what Sal has to say about what's happened.

     The Finns, you see, rather than make noises and wagging fingers, sent their Police and Coastguard Rapid Response Unit to storm the Eagle S's bridge and take control of it, before the crew could do anything.  The ship has now been diverted to Finnish waters and is being investigated.  Art!

Under new ownership

      Force majeur indeed.

     Not a squeak out of Moscow about this.  All the state media will be waiting to see what BB and minions (slavish) say about it, for they dare not express an opinion themselves.

"The War Illustrated Edition 200 16th February 1945"

You're not getting the full picture from these editions, I confess, as I don't bother covering any of the Sinister Union's mentions or photographs, bar a couple of cover illustrations.  Gee, ain't I a swine!  I do it because it makes Dimya go cross-eyed with rage, always an amusing sight.  Art!

     Yes, they did that 'faux colour' thing with this chaps accoutrements.  Conrad also noticed that he's wearing puttees, a very First Unpleasantness thing.  This photo dates from the time when "Sudan" was a single country, rather than the two which exist in the 21st century.

I Never Knew That

Apparently, Oldham has a Mountain Rescue Team.  Art!

     Before you rush to judgement, no, she wasn't out on the moors in sandals and shorts.  She broke her ankle whilst hiking with a group on Dovestones, which I've been on.  Very picturesque but bleak bleak bleak, especially in winter.  Art!

Dovestones in summer

     OMR and Holme Valley Mountain Rescue both helped to provide first aid and stretcher her to the ambulance, which couldn't get any closer than Dovestones Reservoir.  

     Not exactly a great way to spend Christmas Day, but Three Cheers! for the valiant volunteers of OMR, because being on a hospital ward is better than getting hypothermia on the moors.

Finally -

Your Humble Scribe got a belated Christmas present of Marmite-flavoured crisps, which had been put somewhere so safe that they were completely forgotten about.  I like them.  They go well with Marmite-flavoured peanut butter and a hot drink of the brown stuff itself - or Sainsbo's Reduced Salt knock-off version.

     That's all.  Chin chin!