Then You Might Think I Was Whanging On About Food Again
Not an unreasonable conclusion, given that it's one of my favourite topics for consumption, after beer.
Then you might jib a bit, thinking that it's December and nowhere near March, so has Conrad been at the cooking sherry again?
Hardly. Conrad would rather drink Mam Nuoc Fish Sauce from the bottle than sip sherry, it's disgustrous stuff and I remember the horrid milkshake it made back in the Sev
ANYWAY Art!
Food on a table, and it might very well be in March. Art!
Ah, so it was. Art!
I've never heard of it, but it does claw (sorry) part of the way towards the theme of today's Intro. Because - Art!
Er - not sure what's going on here. However, it is undeniably a sword, and that completes the second part of our Intro's theme, that of 'Pen and Sword'. Yes, it took a long time to get there and I'm not sorry one bit.
Because again we're going to be looking at staff work, the dull necessity that underpins any major military operation and plenty of small ones, too. For this we have to thank "AfricanStalingrad", who posts on Twitter about the campaign in Tunisia during the Second Unpleasantness. His mancave makes mine look neat and empty.
I shall attempt to make this as illuminating and even entertaining as possible, which is a daunting task: Conrad is willing to be folding money that there aren't websites dedicated to the typewriters used by HQ staff of any combatants.
Art!
This documents 'lines' seem to be made up from typed horizontal and vertical keystrokes, which must have needed the precision of a watchmaker.
There's a lot of information to unpack in this document. As you may guess, it's a table of organisation and timings for a military formation - a march table. Staff work of this kind is essential when large formations move in concert, because otherwise all you get is a gigantic traffic jam and utter confusion. Art!
The dates are for the 4th and 5th of April 1943, and mark the movement of an armoured brigade - about a third of a division - between offensives by the Allies in Tunisia. Ol' Affy didn't mention which brigade, so Conrad looked closer and noticed a unit name - "2nd Lothians". Working backwards, that meant this was 26th Armoured Brigade, of the 6th Armoured Division. Art!
2nd Lothians in Tunisia
Observe those tanks. They are moving to a timetable drawn up at Divisional or Brigade HQ, observing the 'Density' instruction of 15 'Vehicles To The Mile', meaning they are too spread out for air attack to catch more than one or two vehicles at a time.
I also know that this was a move between positions, not the preface to an assault, because - completist that I am - Your Humble Scribe went over these dates in Volume IV of "The Mediterranean And Middle East" and the 6th Armoured Division is not mentioned in any of the battles around that time. Art!
One of the rare colour photographs of the British in Tunisia. No, Dougal, it is not a tug-of-war between those men and the tank. They are 'reaming' the gun barrel, to clean it out and get rid of encrusted sand or cordite.
ANYWAY if we return to the march table, you'll see all the different units noted down, e.g."10 R.B. + Tp 153 AA Bty", which is incomprehensible gibberish to most of you but speaks volumes to either staff officers or milnerds.
"10 R.B." means "10th Battalion the Rifle Brigade" which is an infantry battalion of an infantry regiment.
"Tp 153 AA Bty" means "One troop of the 153rd Anti-Aircraft Battery". This was a 'Heavy' anti-aircraft unit, using the whacking big 3.7" AA gun. A battery would usually consist of 6 guns and a troop of 2. Art!
The beast in question
You can see the number of vehicles involved in moving this formation - 150 of them. The Rifle Brigade and 153rd Battery being present, and how many vehicles it takes to shift them, doesn't appear magically on a chalkboard at HQ - the staff there have to be up-to-the-minute on what units are where and in what strength.
Please bear in mind that these 582 vehicles are only one-third of the full strength of 6th Armoured Division and imagine how many typewriter keys will need to be hammered - and really hammered, as this was before the days of electric or digital keyboards.
What A Difference Four Hundred Years Makes
Over on Twitter (ha, take that fork up your fundament Elong Tusk!) Shaun Pinner asked a question his (Ukranian) wife asked - why on earth does the English language have the word 'Defenestration' in it? She was puzzled that we had a word so very, very specifically about throwing people out of windows.
Well, you know Conrad and words. Let me consult my "Collins Concise Dictionary". "Defenestration: the act of throwing someone out of a window. originating from C17, from New Latin 'De-" + "Fenestra"". Art!
Behold! This is the 'Defenestration Of Prague" which dates back to 1618. The mob you see assembled are actually the Bohemian National Council, and the two unfortunates about to be propelled through the window are the two primary Roman Catholic members. Those doing the propelling are the Protestant members.
For those concerned, both members landed in a moat outside the building, so were merely bruised in body and dignity.
Today - <leaves pregnant pause>
Back To Bernie And Our Journey
I think the outstanding take away I have from Bernie's artwork is the sheer unfairness that he portrays with his art; all the unfortunate victims who end up disembowelled or dismembered or otherwise discombobulated, through no fault of their own. Even the young lady who went trespassing in "Mausoleum". It's not as if you'd expect to find a pack of feral skeletons lurking in there, is it? Art!
Take a gander at #51, "The Very Devil" which, for once, doesn't feature disembowelment or dismemberment. And more an imp than a demon, it seems.
A Social Media Channel You Never Knew You Needed
It's not been a good week for the Ruffian merchant navy. You are doubtless aware by now of the three Black Sea tankers that have turned the beaches of the Black Sea as charcoal as the name. Well, that's not all that befell the orcs at sea, because a floating crane also sank in the same storm that scuttled the tankers. Art!
I am minded of a quote from Admiral Beatty: "There seems to be something wrong with our Dog Buns! ships today."
This update on the most recent Black Sea submarine fleet was mentioned by Jake Broe on his Youtube channel - you may be ahead of me here - "Jake Broe", courtesy of another interesting Youtuber going by the title "What Is Going On With Shipping?" which I am definitely going to check up on. Anchors aweigh!
No "TWI" today, we've had enough of matters martial.
The Heart Of Darkness
In a very real sense. Conrad, being a grumpy old man, has been complaining of late about how early in the afternoon the shades of night begin to fall. Should the skies be overcast, then you need the house lights on by 15:00. Art!
Conrad is pretttty sure this is how "30 Days Of Night" got started, with the original writer and artist thinking "What if ....." and working from there.
Finally -
Wonder Wifey was gloasting about having made a jacket potato by using the Convection function of our new microwave, so Conrad is going to sit down and study the instruction manual to see what it says about chicken drumsticks. I'll let you know.
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