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Monday, 9 December 2024

Excelsior!

It Sounds Great, Doesn't It?

Despite being Latin <hack spit>, meaning "Higher" although it's not clear if this is simply a case of standing at the top of the stairs, or holding the moral high ground.  Once again, one of those words that just pop up in my mind for no good reason, but a gift for content creators, thanks Steve and Oscar.  Art!

A moment's silence for Stan, ta

     Of rather less import (around the hallowed halls of The Mansion) is the fact that New York State has adopted the name as it's motto, which is pithy and saves money on printing costs.  Where did they get the idea?  From a poem of the same title, by Longfellow.

"A youth who bore, 'mid snow and ice

A banner with the strange device,

Excelsior!"

     There are grammatical quibbles about exactly what description the word correctly has, and that the poet got it wrong, thus being Wrongfellow, and I'm not sorry about that pun one bit.

     I'm typing this addendum in long after the paragraph below was typed out, since Longfellow's verse brought on another attack of the recalls.  "With the strange device" just reminded me of another novel's title.  Art!


     The cover illo is completely inapt, because the novel has nothing to do with sci-fi, and everything to do with murder.

     Of course - obviously! - this wouldn't be an Intro, nor would I be Conrad, if we left things there, because another memory came unbidden from the past, about the character "Nemesis The Warlock" from "2000AD".  Art!

 


     Ol' Nemmy is about as anti-hero as can be, locked in perpetual conflict with Torquemada and the Termight Empire, for in his universe Hom. Sap. are verrrrry definitely the bad guys.  One thing he has going for him is his sword, 'Excessus', for Lo! in this far future people (if you stretch the term to it's elastic limits) still run around with edged weapons in order to hack each other about.  Art!


     That's Olric, who was despatched upon a quest by Torquemada himself; to track down and retrieve Excessus, because it - er - had high re-sale value?  My cunning plan was to link another item about steel with this sword, except Excessus is made out of 'tcham', a material derived from a sun.  Shot me down there, didn't you Nemmy?  Hmmmmm <Conrad ponders> we can call it 'star steel' and get away with it, ha-ha!

     Jumping tracks abruptly, allow me to illustrate, if Art will put down his bowl of coal -



     I had that single many moons ago.  "A Person Isn't Safe Anywhere These Days" is an absolute belter of a track, it practically leaps out of the speakers and punches you in the ears.  In a good way.  Right! time to do A Little Musical Critique, watch out Chameleons!  It will all make sense in the end.

As she parts her greying hair
Lucky her, Conrad's thatch is white as sea-salt
Voices on the stair
Location uncertain: inside or outside?
When she turns there's something there
Frankly, creepy.  Is this a person or persons or what?
Like a nightmare from the past

To the sound of splintered glass
Watch out, that was expensive!
Dance the monsters in the mask
Word salad, this bit.  Why are monsters wearing masks?  Fear of ridicule?
Man of steel
Man of steel
This is not a good thing because we are not talking Kal El here

     Given that this sounds like a gang breaking into a house and assaulting the elderly female resident, 'Man of steal' would be more appropriate.  Except that wouldn't allow me to riff on Excelsior! and Excessus, so just ignore that bad pun.  

     There you go, I think I was quite merciful there, nobody's crying and nobody needs a hanky.


"The War Illustrated Edition 199 2nd February 1945"

As Dr. Caddick-Adams explains in his "1945 Victory In The West", one factor utterly beyond the control of both sides in the European theatre was the weather.  The winter of 1944 - 1945 was especially horrid, thanks to the bad winter, and because so many men in uniform were out in the cold and wet all day long.  Art!


     Heavy rain and snow was exacerbated by the Teutons very unsportingly breaching Dutch dykes and letting floodwaters create problems for the Allies, as in the top picture.  The 'vessels' you see here are really vehicles, being the M29 'Weasel' amphibian tractor, which could cope equally well with deep snow, floods or mud.  Art!


     The lower picture shows what you might call Herr Schickelgruber's anti-aircraft at work, because he gambled on low clouds preventing Allied airpower from intervening.  It frequently did.  Just not always.


Looting Is Bad, Okay?

Do not loot.  Not only is it a bad look, you can get arrested, tried and be given a prison sentence, which will really mess up your plans for the weekend.

     However - O my beloved word! - context is all.  Art!


     He'll have to let that fridge sit upright and unplugged for a good few hours whilst the coolant settles, bec

   ANYWAY Conrad did a bit of quick arithmetic and worked out the average Syrian salary comes to $12 per month, so you can understand people getting bent out of shape with The Chinless Wonder having multiple palaces all over the country.  His tight-fistedness seems to have also extended to not paying his army, which is right up there in the list of Dictator Mistakes Not To Make.


South Canadians And Their Love Of Weaponry

Notice how carefully I used that blanket term instead of 'Guns', because the next item from our collection of DANGEROUS toys of the Sixties beggars belief.  Art!


     Erk!  Yes it's all Robin Hood fun and games until someone imitates Harold Hadrada and the morgue gets a new arrival.  Conrad's hasty internet search didn't uncover any fatalities caused by these darts of the Devil, probably because modern versions have a rubber sucker instead of a sharp piece of steel.  It's not clear from the photograph above if the arrows have fletchings upon them, because if not then they are going to be wildly inaccurate.  Just what parents need; high-velocity metal-tipped projectiles flying around at random.


Thank Heavens For Armoured Underwear

Because the Coincidence Hydra is looming once again.  You will recall our Intro that mentioned "Magna" in Sheffield, the 'science adventure' place.  I had originally confused it with "Eureka", which is a much smaller children's endeavour, often taken in as one part of a two-event day by parents, who end up at the Piece Hall.  Whilst Your Humble Scribe was purchasing a packet of crisps today from the Co-Op in Royton, one of the jolly female assistants was talking about seeing Placebo in concert at - 

     The Piece Hall.  Art!


     This just seen on the feed page.  No, I'm not going to click on it, because they want me to do that, which is why they didn't specify either act, the rascals.  Nor whether they are musicians or actors or dancers or a combination of all three.  Away with ye and yer click-baityness!


Finally -

Better take the flask of coffee I had yesteryon down to wash it out.  Nothing stinks quite so appallingly as old used coffee bags, as I have discovered to my disgust.  If you have any idea why then the Comments are always open.






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