Ahoy Yesteryear!

It's That Time Of The Weekend

Where we cast an eye backwards o'er the fields and forests of the past, and wonder how Conrad can wibble on endlessly yet not repeat himself, except for the second post on Sunday evening.  It's because I am endlessly creative.  

     Not a few of you may be wondering what on earth happened all those months ago when the Motley suddenly stopped being mentioned?  Art!

This might be the Motley.
Or, it might not

     The World Motley Council placed a moratorium on BOOJUM! whilst it deliberated on whether or not what we'd been inflicting on it was 'Cruel and Unusual Punishment'.  The trouble is, they work slower than the South Canadian Congress and have only just gotten around to permitting the Motley to be variously belaboured, belittled and belambasted.

     So, Motley, let's begin the Curare-Dipped Catch Dart game!

2023

BOOJUM!: We Sink To The Depths (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2022

BOOJUM!: The Music Of The Spheres (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2021

BOOJUM!: A Monster Mix (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2020

BOOJUM!: If I Were To Say "River In The Sky" (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2019

BOOJUM!: The City That Likes Bikes (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2018

BOOJUM!: More Of Mars (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2017

BOOJUM!: The Man Who Stole The Moon (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2016

BOOJUM!: Us Bad Boys (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2015

BOOJUM!: Bake Off Take Off! (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

2014

BOOJUM!: Today Has A Theme - No. (comsatangel2002.blogspot.com)

The Prime Of Miss Jean Helmet

I Needed A Way To Wow You

And here we are.  This Intro is another example of how Form Ferrously Follows Function, and since I'm making it up as I go along, we shall see how long I can witter for.

     Conrad has not read the novel, seen the film nor watched the television series, and has no intention of doing so, because I am horrid like that.  Art!

     Hmmmm not convinced about this AI art-generator.

     ANYWAY let us now turn our attention to - HELMETS!

     That was surely no surprise, it's in the title.  Okay, when the nations of Europe and This Sceptred Isle went to war in 1914, they had one thing in common: ineffective headgear.  I doubt I shall get a single image of all the major combatants, so let's prod Art into action.

Men of the British Expeditionary Force 1914

     Note the heads protected by the mighty peaked hat, which could successfully withstand even the heaviest downpour.  Rubbish at protecting the head from things like spall, shrapnel or bullets, mind.  Art!

     This bunch of rascals are French poilus of 1914 vintage, also equipped with a kepi that kept out wind and rain and not much else.  Conrad, because that's how his mind works, notes that nobody here is clean-shaven.  The tash abounds!  Let us transition from the M8s and see if we can find an equivalent with the Teutons.  Art!

     Don't be fooled by the pickelhaube second from port, it was made of leather.

     As the First Unpleasantness became both protracted and relatively static, all parties realised that their chaps in the trenches needed more sturdy headgear, since a piece of fabric or leather had little stopping power against lead-antimony shrapnel balls.  Art!

     Enter the Brodie pattern helmet, hence today's title.  The Teutons used to describe them as 'soup-bowl' helmets, which is a pretty fair jibe.  Originally they weren't issued in sufficient numbers to equip the whole army, and were treated as 'Trench stores'.  Production did get up to speed eventually.  Art!

     

     They must have been of some utility, as Perfidious Albion continued to use them for the whole duration of the Second Unpleasantness.  No, I'm not going into detail about the Czechs in British service in North Africa, go watch the film "Tobruk" for a bit of an education.  The South Canadians adopted it in the First Unpleasantness and were still using it when they joined in the Second one.   Art!

     Being cocky colonials, they tended to wear theirs at a jaunty angle that would have had the sergeant-major down on the neck of whichever hapless Tommy dared to emulate.  That still is from the excellent "They Were Expendable" which is an unsentimental depiction of the early months, when the South Canadians were getting a can of whoop-bottom opened upon them.

     So.  The Brodie helmet, designed to protect the head, neck and shoulders of the wearer.   This is where FFFF comes in, since a thought rose unbidden in the mucky mire of my mental mendaciousness yesteryon: "Haven't I seen something similar to the Brodie in depictions of medieval warfare?"

     Why yes! yes I had.  Art!

     There you go, Form Ferrously Following Fashion.  Bear in mind this is a good five hundred years before trench warfare and shrapnel rounds.  The kettle helmet, as it was known thanks to it's resemblance to a cooking utensil (or soup bowl), was easier and cheaper to make than other types of helmet, nor did it obscure the wearer's vision or hearing, as an enclosed helmet would.  This is a serious issue if there's an opponent looking to turn you into human kebab.  If you were a humble infantryman then it gave protection from cavalry, who would be using a cutting downstroke.  It was also jolly useful in siege warfare.  Art!

     Again, as it would five hundred years later, the kettle helmet protected the head, neck and shoulders from projectiles fired or dropped from above, a common occurrence in siege warfare.

     There you go, not a bad witter for being encapsulated in a single thought.  Well done Conrad!

The Times They Are A-Whirling

Our old washing machine was reliable in that it could be counted on to break down once every two years.  This last time The Mansion had a meeting and decided to go all out and buy a Bosch, which costs more, admittedly, yet which comes with a manufacturer's five year warranty.  So, Wonder Wifey used her superpower of driving a bargain and had a chap not only purchase the old Indesit but take it away.  Art!

     Test run.  Note the amount of froth.  This machine requires half the detergent of the old one.  Teuton technology!  Art?

     It is remarkably quiet in operation, certainly compared to the JUMBO JET IS TAKING OFF level of noise from the old machine when spinning at 1200 r.p.m.  Also, it's clever enough to detect the mass of what you're shovelling into it and will curtly inform you that careless Hom. Sap. has overloaded the machine.  Which, come to think of it, is a bit Skynetty.

Pining For The Fuds

If Conrad, ensconced in his Sekrit Layr, opens a packet of crisps, or tackles food with a knife and fork, Edna is immediately there.  Her dog-nest in the hallway allows her to hear any potential food noises from lounge, kitchen or Conrad's man-cave.  Smart puppy.  Art!

"As if by magic, the Edna appeared"

     She has learned by experience that the long, wistful gaze is a winner.

A Catastrophe!

As you should surely know by now, Conrad refers to and annotates various vlogs put out by "Joe Blogs", who makes economics interesting.  Joe had 1,000 videos up, put out over three years, and 360,000 subscribers.

     Yes, 'had', past tense, because scummy hackers hijacked his Youtube channel.  They have now been ejected, but YT has also removed ALL Joe's content.  He is currently appealing this and rightly so, since this is how he makes his income.   Art!

Joe Blogs - YouTube

     That's the link to his new channel.  If you feel up to doing a good deed today, please Subscribe.  He's had to start from scratch and is restricted in what he can upload.  Art!

"City In The Sky"

We jump from Australia to America, where sinister skullduggery is afoot.

    At the same time, three Americans dressed in camouflage fatigues were observing a delapidated shack on the outskirts of New Orleans, a city battered and depopulated even before the Big Crash.  Most of the city’s tiny population were concentrated towards the port area, and only the odd hermit, Wanderer or criminal lived on the outskirts.

     The three were from the Carlsbad Crew and consisted of Colonel Boyce, Signals Specialist Werner and Boyce’s ADC, Captain Mower.  All three were armed, Boyce carrying an induction pistol and the two others with induction rifles; Mower also carried a hi-spec pair of digital binoculars that he watched the shack with.

     ‘Definitely weird,’ he muttered to the colonel.  ‘I can pick out the Chief on infra-red, but that other guy doesn’t register at all.’

     “That other guy” was apparently a voodoo priest, according to the two other district residents the soldiers had questioned earlier that day.  Solitary and strange, the priest still had visitors who came to see him.  And yeah, one of them was a soldier.

     The Colonel’s initial impulse when Washington called him was to snap angrily at the suggestion that an insider had carried out sabotage; as with the Veep, he’d later called his hasty response into question.  Given that there had been sabotage, a suspicion he’d been careful never to actually state aloud, then – if this bizarre story of alien infiltrators was correct – the saboteur had to be someone who’d gone off-site, and on a regular basis.

     Gosh, whatever could be going on?

     Dog Buns, I made the mistake of reading on from where that extract ends.

Finally -

I am having to keep a weather eye on the skies, as a load of my washing is out on the line, and today seems changeable.  It's still cold, and windy, just not raining yet, so March might end acceptably.   We'll see.  Also, April is my next Dry Month, so today's ale-quaffing will be the last until May.

A Deep Dive Down A Rabbit Warren

This One Is Going To Meander

Incidentally, the noun above comes from the Greek for the River Maeander, which had a very convoluted, winding profile.  Art!

     Okay, let's crack on.  About 50 years ago my grandmother, visiting from South Canada, left behind a couple of paperbacks she'd brought over.  One of these titles hadn't bothered my consciousness for a good 50 years until Friday afternoon, when the name bobbed to the surface of the sea of septic sewage that constitutes my mind.  Sorry if you can't unsee that image.  Art!

     In case you were wondering, that cover illo has no relation to anything in the novel.  Conrad can still remember parts of the text as he read it so many times.  It concerns an assassin working for the Ruffians, who is tasked with assassinating President De Gaulle in Paris - hey, every man's got to have a hobby - and who may - or may not - be the long-missing brother of a South Canadian doctor.  The CIA are involved, and it begins with 'Eric' involved in dodgy combat at the fag-end of the Second Unpleasantness.  To wit, he gets stuck in a culvert.  Art!

A culvert

A Calvert

     They used to say 'You can never go back' but that was before the days of teh Interwebz, and Your Humble Scribe resorted to a quick search on Abebooks, to find - Art!

     They are taking the mickey with the £3.25 shipping, it's a small paperback book, not a hardback trilogy.
     ANYWAY much to my surprise, there is a background to the author, Lucien Agniel.  Thanks to the website "Mystery*File" for filling in gaps.  First of all, the publishers for CNI were 'Paperback Library', who were an imprint of 'Coronet', and that's who held the copyright.

     Why is this significant?  Well, because it implies that 'Lucien Agniel' was not a real person, rather a pen name or, more likely, a house writer, i.e. a hack being paid by the word to belt out product.

     But no!  Art?

     To top this list off, Art!

     M*F does a better job of tracking down the elusive Agniel than I did, discovering that he did, indeed, serve in the Second Unpleasantness, earning a Bronze Star in the process, then went on to work for a newpaper in South Carolina, and was also involved with Radio Free Europe.  Equally interesting are the comments from former colleagues of LA, and relatives.  I shall here append an extract for veracity (and to up the word count!)

1. Tony Wyman Says:
   November 4th, 2013 at 12:18 pm

   Lucien Angniel was a professor of mine in 1983-4 at Davis and Elkins College. He was a wonderful human being who was as entertaining as he was kind and generous. I think about him often and regret having only known him for a brief time. I hope to be as elegant as he was in those last years of his life.

     LA popped his wooden footwear back in 1988, and these replies are mostly dated 2011.  As his daughter adds:

He loved writing his “spy” novels. I remember when I was in high school he would get up at the crack of dawn during the week and write for a couple of hours before going to work. He had a lot of fun with these books and it’s nice to see that they haven’t been entirely forgotten.

     Now BOOJUM! brings them to a whole new audience.  You're welcome.

     Dog Buns! I'm beginning to wonder about that Abebooks entry and ordering it anyway <wallet squeaks in anguish>.

     From a river in Turkey to a South Canadian literature professor, you cannot say we are not eclectic here on the blog.

"The Thing" Is -

Conrad came across a brief article on his browser feed about John Carpenter's magnum opus "The Thing", which had a couple of items I knew not wot about.  Firstly, Kurt Russell had to have training to use the flamethrower, which seems to have mostly consisted of not setting everyone else on fire, and only torching what had to be torched.  Art!

     Second, the character Childs was played by Keith David, whose first film role this was, since his background was theatre.  Unfamiliar with filming techniques, he was 'over-projecting' during rehearsals, which was pointed out to him by Richard Masur, after which he lowered the volume.

     John himself described the end result an an 'enormous failure, and I got fired'.  Well, yes, but attitudes to the film have done a complete 360º since it's release and people now see it as a classic.  The budget was a whopping $15 million, which was whopping in 1982.  Art!

     With promotion & advertising plus distribution, it likely didn't even break even.

If You Think That's Bad -

To nick a line from Douglas Adams - there is a film now on release called "The American Society Of Magical Negroes" - this has made a lot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move.

     Have I seen it?  No.  Will I ever see it?  No.  To those who criticise me, you don't need to lick a **** to know it'll taste like ****.*

     What is remarkable about this film is the enormous budget.  The studio tried to keep it a secret but details have leaked about it, and since it got a tax break from the UK, the whole story will eventually be published.  Art!

      The numbers are that the original budget was $277 million, with a $50 million tax break rendered by HM Government, so it's total is only (!) $227 million.  That's still a staggeringly large amount.  What does "Box Office Mojo" have to say about it?  Art!

     So it's made back 1% of it's budget BEFORE we add on P & A and distribution.  After you factor in those it may make back 0.75% of the budget.  Nor is this merely the first day's takings, this thing has been out for two weeks.

     This is a turkey of epic dimensions.  In fact, in real life it would be a turkey as big as the Empire State Building.

"City In The Sky"

The Doctor returns, with an ally.

     Mike and Billy were sitting by a fire, outside the wrecked town, roasting a fish clad in clay.  Mike’s burns glistened with a slathered layer of goosefat that could be smelt even at a distance.

     ‘Blood and sand!  Doctor Smith!  You’re alive!’ blurted Mike, jumping upright in surprise.

     ‘Is that a dingo?’asked a worried Billy, more to the point and pointing, too

     ‘An ally,’ explained the Doctor.  ‘In future they may return to warn you if the Lithoi attempt to move out or attack.’  The silent dingo stayed behind him, pressed against his legs.

     ‘You can’t trust ‘em,’ opined Mike.  He got presented with a paper bag containing strangely-coloured and shaped objects.

     ‘Jelly babies.  Good for establishing trust.’

     So saying, the Doctor pitched one at the lurking dingo, who snapped it up in mid-air and then vanished into the shadows.

     ‘Still no time to explain?’ gibed Mike.

     ‘Time’s running short as we speak.  I know the Lithoi are planning some dreadful retribution and we have to act before they do – or everyone now alive will stop being so.’

     The way the little man rolled his “r”s when he said “Dreadful retribution” would have sounded silly in another person.  Mike didn’t want any more details about what this dreadful thing might be.

     And with that, the small traveller disappeared into the night, off to his strange blue box.

     An ally of sorts.

So Much Text!

Let's bring in a graph.  Graphs are great.  Unless, in this case, you're Ruffian.  Art!

     Down from ₽92.45 yesteryon, which I did not expect, as these graphs don't usually change over the weekend.  Expect Peter The Average to demand more gold be sold to prop up the third-weakest currency in the world.

Finally -

O!  A touch of either serendipity or synchronicity here.  I was idly trawling my browser feed for artistic inspiration to round today's blog off, and what do I find?  Art!

     "The Thing", "Escape From New York", "Big Trouble In Little China", "Escape From LA" and "Elvis", which I've never seen.

*  "Lime" and "Acid".  What, did you think otherwise?

Bivacco Gervasutti? Hold My Beer!

You Ought To Recall, If Ye Be Not Goldfish

That Conrad did a long Intro about the Italian 'bivouac' in the Aosta Valley, which sits at 2,800 metres elevation.  It is, essentially, a small hostel with sleeping and cooking accommodation for up to twelve people, sitting on a narrow rock ledge, powered by solar panels and airlifted into position.  Art!

     It really is as bleak and isolated as it seems, and what might look like water in the background is actually a glacier.  You get those at 2,800 metres elevation.

     If you have been following BOOJUM! for any length of time then you will recall that we occasionally cover mountaineering, not because we like it or would ever (EVER!) want to participate, more along the lines of horrified fascination as to what Hom. Sap. will endure to achieve.  Well, I did notice in passing that there was another Youtube vlog about spending the night in a refuge at height.  Art!

     Or, if you want to put it in proper measurements, over two and three-quarters miles high.

     This is another Roman site, going back to all of 1893, when it received the royal seal of approval, because Queen Margaret of Savoy overnighted there.  I'm not going to get into the history of the Roman aristocracy and monarchy as we have a 1,200 word count here, not 120,000.

     My next question was, obviously - of course! - how on earth did it get built?

     The answer is refreshingly simple: on the back of mules and men.  They are the ones who transported supplies and equipment up Punta Gnifetti, to hammer and nail the lodge together.  Art!

     This looks Dog Buns! dangerous.  The bloke to port is hanging over a drop where it would take him whole minutes to hit the bottom, and he doesn't seem to have any retaining harness or rope.  Art!

     This looks pretty formal, so I'm guessing one of those ladies is Queenie.  Note the modest scale of the Capanna.  Conrad is guessing that this is the Latinate equivalent of the Hispanic 'Cabana'.  Cabin, to you uncultured louts.

     Here enter Bruno Pisani.  Ol' Brew is an Italian mountaineer, one of that breed of people who endure drawn-out desperate discomfort to beat the elements or Nature or both.  Art!

Brew

     He speaks excellent English with only a slight accent, and there are people here in This Sceptred Isle who are less couth than he.

     Brew and a couple of mates decided that they were going to ascend the Punta Gnifetti, overnight in the Capanna, wake with the sunrise and take pictures, then head back home.

     There were one or two problems.  One, the Capanna was closed for winter season.  This means you don't have access to: "HALF BOARD ACCOMMODATION INCLUDES: dinner (2 first courses, 1 second course with side dish, bread and dessert), overnight stay, sweet & salty breakfast buffet, tea thermos, tourist tax. Free wi-fi access.

BED & BREAKFAST ACCOMODATION INCLUDES: overnight stay, sweet & salty breakfast buffet, tea thermos, tourist tax. Free wi-fi access."

     TUTTAVIA - which is 'HOWEVER' in Italian - their 'Winter Room' is available all year round, so Brew and crew knew they'd be able to shelter there.

     Two, they were going to ascend the mountain in one go.  To reach such a height without any acclimatisation along the way means suffering minor health problems.  Art!

     There's no transition from green and pleasant to grey and icy in this vlog because Brew and crew kind of cheated, and caught the cable car up to 3,200 metres elevation.  Their intent was to ski their way to Regina Margherita, taking a shorter route than most parties, who walk their way there.  Art!

     They arrived well after nightfall, at about midnight.  What you see from here on in are the 'winter rooms' which are open to all regardless of season.  As Brew admitted, all three were tired, thirsty and hungry.  Art!

      We've encountered these provisions before.  The trio melted snow on the gas hob to boil water, then added that to these dried ration packs, and then undoubtedly enjoyed them as if they were the finest of fine dining.  Yomping across snow for six hours will do that to your appetite.  Art!

     This is a stunning beauty shot Brew got at 03:00, before he went to sleep.  You can see clouds below the Capanna, and the moon, and an electrical storm in the distance.  Conrad can understand remembering an event like this, you don't get too many in one lifetime.  Art!

     Pre-dawn drone footage.  No, that's not mist; the refuge is sitting inside a cloud.  Note the guard-rails, because as mentioned about the artisan creating this building in 1893, if you fall off it's a long way down.  Art!

Daylight drone depiction

     Having spent the night and got their dawn photographs, Brew and crew headed down the mountainside.  This is where skis come in, as they made it in a fraction of the time that humble clod-hoppers would have done.

Overnight in the Highest Hut of the Alps | CAPANNA MARGHERITA 4556m (youtube.com)

     Bruno's full video if you want to experience it.

     Wow Conrad The Verbose strikes again, bring on a few picture-heavy items.

Currency

I shall make this as short and painless as poss.  You may be dimly aware that the Ruffian economy is not in the best of health, thanks to sanctions, Ukrainian drone attacks, their blue-collar workers all being dead (or maintaining infrastructure) in Ukraine, and enormous incompetence and corruption.  Yes well.  Art!

     From this you can see that the ₽ is not looking too healthy, and has been on a slide for the past three weeks.  In 2023 it had bounced back to ₽88 to the dollar, nothing like that now.

     Why is this significant?  Well, because a weak ruble means migrant workers see Ruffia as a less attractive destination.  Thus there exists a significant deficit between the number of blue collar workers wanting to work in Ruffia, and the ones actually working there.

     Yes, there is a whole sub-tranche here about the recent Crocus City Hall attacks and the fallout from same, which we may cover.  Art!

Ruffia the worker's paradise

Here's A Cleanse For The Mind

In "Wayne's World" they described it as a 'sorbet', and we have a Wayne's World comic in the archives somewhere ab

     ANYWAY let us now illustrate <coughs deferentially> 'Popradska Okruzne' because life goes on.  And on.  Art!

     "Crossroad ERFNERF FNERFNERF" or somesuch.  From the map it seems to be a road from Slovenia to Croatia.  And you're welcome.

"City In The Sky"

The alien 'squatters' are frothing with rage at Hom. Sap. not being either dead or disobedient.

Arkan 22 had his own concerns.  The panic meeting had been an unseemingly quick resolution to their problems, only eight hours long.  Against that, nothing in the way of missiles or launch systems could be deployed outside until the plain had dried sufficiently because the low-caste workers would suffer terminal shock if they had to manoeuvre on ground that visibly contained water.  Then there was the mysterious asteroid impact itself.  It had occurred hundreds of kilometres south of them, nowhere near the base, so he felt right at having dismissed it as a natural occurrence, despite what Miskan 54 might think.

CHAPTER TWENTY ONE: Take A Chance With Me

     The Doctor made his way back across the plains to New Eucla, with the dingo trotting behind him, seemingly now his best friend after he’d tossed it a couple of jelly babies, which had been devoured with a great deal of slobbering and chewing.  Away to either side, occasionally visible in the gathering dark, a couple of other dingoes kept up with them.  The Timelord reasoned he’d have trouble with this distant escort if his accomplice weren’t present to warn them off.

     Doctor and dingo.  Classic double-act.

Finally -

Your Humble Scribe had recourse to take a trot into Lesser Sodom this afternoon, since I shall be nailed to The Mansion's greensward on Saturday, thanks to the new washing machine arriving.  We have no idea when.  Art!

     Brand new livery, all-new signage, they still didn't turn up for 50 minutes in Lesser Sodom this afternoon.  As reliable as ever.

     Once again, how the Dog Buns! did we ever create an international empire?

A Very Small City In The Sky

Ha!  Sometimes I Amuse Even Myself

You ought to be familiar with the fan-fiction excerpts I have been posting here, from my "Doctor Who" back catalogue, which currently tell the tale of the Arcologies in Earth orbit.  These are self-sufficient space-stations that house a selection fraction of the human race, waiting for the chance to return to a post-apocalyptic Earth after things have cooled down a lot.  Well, 'self-sufficient' up to a point, as they've been stuck in orbit for far longer than intended.  Food is running short, things are breaking down and wearing out, and only a strange little man with a straw boater and his riot Grrrl companion can save the day.  Art!

     None of that has anything to do with the Jorasses mountain ranges in the Aosta province of Italy, a geological feature that has probably never bothered you before.  Me neither, until I came across a reckless Roman mountaineer and his chirpy lady friend: Bernardo and Chul.  It was their sworn intent to hike and climb up the face of said mountains in order to reach the 'Bivacco Gervasutti', which is Roman for 'Bivouac Gervasutti'.  Named after the famous Italian mountaineer Gervasutti.  I shall take that on trust.  Art!

     This is the bivouac as it was, re-built, in 1961.  Very modest, I'm sure you'll agree, because all the materials were carried up by mountaineers.  

     Some 40 years later, the local Alpine climbing club got more like a swarm than a single been in their bonnet, and decided that what the Aosta valley needed, above all else, was a new bivvie.  It would be large, it would be modern, it would look, in Conrad's opinion, as if an aircraft had crashed onto the mountainside.  Art!

     No, the structural components were not carried up on the backs of sweating alpini, it was airlifted into position.  Frankly, you'd not get Conrad in there under any circumstances, it looks far too flimsy and barely-secured.  Not so for Bernardo! O no, he was determined to get up there and spend the night.  His journey began in the foothills of the Aosta Valley.  Art!

     First obstacle was a rather testy river.  Bernardo didn't know that there's a crossing point further up the valley where a bridge crosses the frothing torrent.  O well, he'll know better next time.  Then it's up a trail that is quite poorly-defined, where the job transitions from walking to hiking to mountaineering.  Art!

Waaaaaaaaaay up there

     

     From what I could see and what Ol' Bernie said, those ropes are permanently positioned, so that anyone wanting to climb the mountain doesn't have to bring miles and miles of it along.  This is the point at which Your Cowardly Scribe would have happily turned round and gone home.  Art!

     I've had to put this in as Extra-Large, as otherwise the bivvie is invisible.  It's the small, circular red-outlined object just south of dead centre in the picture above.  Let's get an enlarged Snip.  Art!

     By this time our intrepid pair are above the treeline and soon all the vegetation vanishes, with only rock and ice around.  Ol' Bernie enjoys the solitude at this height, which he is quite welcome to.  Conrad not persuaded.  Art!

     No green, only grey.  Plus a glacier.  Well, I suppose the chilly white massif breaks up the boring monochrome landscape.  When our daring pair up in the air arrive at Bivacca Gersutti there is a moment of panic as they wonder if the front door is locked.  Of course - obviously! - it isn't, because what thief would think of a six-hour hike and mountain-climb with a ton of gear, across treacherous ice-field and a raging river, in order to steal a few blankets and pans?  Art!

Kitchen

Bedroom

     

     There is power to the hob and electric lighting thanks to the solar panels you can see attached to the rockface above, plus a computer able to broadcast an emergency signal if the worst has befallen you.  The whole Bivacco accommodates up to twelve people, making it perhaps the smallest city ever, yet undoubtedly in the sky.  Ol' Bernie and Chul had the unparalleled pleasure the next morning of having to climb all the way back down, the lucky things.  Art!

FYI, "EE" is not that demanding

     Yes, the Bivvie sits at 2,870 metres elevation, or one and three-quarter miles in proper measurements.  You think that's high? 

Mock It, The Rocket

As you may be dimly aware, the Ruffian military juggernaut has proven to have feet not only made of clay, but interlarded with lead, too.  They are only able to maintain their forces in Ukraine by emptying out the old mothballed vehicle parks, with equipment 70 years old being sent to the front lines.  Even then, there are gaps, such as MRLS vehicles.

     Not only that, they have been creating "Frankentanks" that blend weapons and chassis together to birth unholy hybrids.  The only people who appreciate these chimerae are wargamers and modellers, who love novelty.  Art!

     Behold the monstrosity that is an RBU 6000 Anti-Submarine Rocket Launcher, mounted on a GAZ truck.  Even as I type, wargamers will be tastelessly working out the stats for range, accuracy and points cost.  These things have been created because - well, the Ruffian Black Sea Fleet is currently hiding in port, not cruising the high seas, so they can afford to donate a few shooty-shooty items.  Art!

     There you see the RBU 6000 in it's natural habitat, where it operates in conjunction with a fire-control system.  The - not sure what to call it - Muck-a-Truck? - operates in conjunction with the Mark One Human Eyeball.  I'm sure it comes across as very 'MacBeth' - "Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.'

I May Have To Check This Out

As you should surely know by now, Conrad likes his music.  At this very moment I am playing The Mars Volta's "A Zed And Two Naughts", which is a very glorious free-form racket.  That percussion!

     ANYWAY I happened across a musical reference on Twitter from user 'Grandpa Yurko', who seems to be a genuine Uke, and whom suggested a potential soundtrack to A Single Unfortunate Event.  Art!

*Ukarinian ethno-gothic band "Sugar - white death" (Цукор - біла смерть) from late 80's till early 90's.*

     

     I shall let you puzzle out the Roman and Cyrillic alphabets yourself.

     Irony piled upon irony, sugar is indeed white death for Conrad, him being a diabetic and all.

     Currently playing "Echoes" so SWD will have to wait a minute.  I'd no idea it was Rick Wright singing the vocals along with Big Dave.

"City In The Sky"

A proper city-sized population up in the heavens and then some.  

     Later that day, deep in the machine shops of the Lithoi’s base, Orskan 94 hissed and seethed to himself.  It was all very well Arkan 22 giving orders like “no rest” but in practice that meant unwilling shifts of the low-caste workers making mistakes thanks to exhaustion, very probably making things less successful than if they worked normally.  And he was supposed to carry out both projects simultaneously!  Which meant both went slowly, and doubtless Arkan 22 wouldn’t like that, either.

     Nilkan 34, having a higher caste status and a correspondingly higher position in the ship, had his concerns, too.  He could cook up some frightful disease, certainly, and do it quicker than those lower caste spanner-wielders could build a flying eye, and that was the problem; they’d end up storing a deadly viral agent aboard their baseship.

     Well, necessity made it so, he reasoned.  They had done it before, with their original created disease, the one that humans called “The Phage”.  After all, there was simply no way humans could damage the baseship, even if they knew where it was .....

     Yes, well, being aspiring world-conquerors comes with a whole lot of baggage I'll bet you never thought twice about, did you?

Remember FTX?

The crypto-currency scamble that put a serious dent in all those bright shiny hopes of the get-rich-quick crowd?  The only one of the guilty - sorry! - allegedly guilty quintet of leaders who pled Not Guilty, Sam Bankman-Fried, has just been sentenced after being found guilty months ago.  Art!

     That's an hideous sketch!  He looks like an orc in a wig!

     He may now be regretting that he didn't plea deal when he had the chance.

Finally -

It's best not to consume gin on an empty stomach, so time to scoff a whole shelf of remaindered food in our fridge.

Laterz!