Sometimes I Amuse Even Myself
Not sure if today is one of those days. We'll see.
Right, to make this Intro make as much sense as it ever will, we need to dig down deep into the murkier history of the Second Unpleasantness, specifically to do with the Teuton occupation of France. No, we are not doing anything about can-can dancers you fearsome perverts. Art!
Except, perhaps, putting up a picture to tempt the passers-by.
ANYWAY back to Occupied and Vichy France. I have found an excellent illustrative map to show what I mean. Art!
You see, in November of 1942 the Allies landed in French North Africa, to the gobsmacked bewilderment of the Teutons, who promptly invaded Vichy and brought it under Teuton control, apart from that green-tinted bit, which was occupied by the Italians. When Italy switched sides, the Teutons occupied that bit, too, probably feeling that the world didn't love them any more. Art!
Including Cannes. Remember this, there will be a test later.
Let us now abruptly jump back in time to the year 1940, when the British were facing down the Fascist Italian army on the Libya-Egypt border. This was an engagement where fuel was almost as important as water, and the British used an item known as the "Four-Gallon Flimsy" to transport their fuel around. Let us poke Art awake with this needle-sharp 4H pencil -
This item was used to allow vehicles to be fuelled, as it was just light enough for one man to carry and pour. It was intended to be used once and thrown away, and was incredibly shoddy in manufacture as a result. The seams, either rolled or welded, frequently split, especially if flimsies were stacked atop one another, causing major leakage. There is an anecdote in "The Sands Of Valour" about being able to follow the path of a fuel convoy, because the flimsies leaked so copiously.
Then! Enter the Teutons. The evil goose-stepping swine did have some decent kit, which they brought to Africa, and here you don't get pictures of Panzers swanning across the Trigh El Abd, because one of their most valuable items was this - Art! O stop whining or I'll run a current through it next time
Respect to the Jerrican, as it was nicknamed. It was made out of pressed steel, was robust and could be used many times, stacked easily and, most of all, DID NOT LEAK. The British army fell upon any they captured with glee, and the design was recognised as such a quantum improvement over the tawdry Flimsy that it was rapidly adopted and used in vast numbers. Sending one thousand gallons of petrol in flimsies meant only seven hundred gallons might arrive, or five hundred on a bad day. Sending one thousand gallons in jerricans meant one thousand gallons would arrive, bar a couple that fell off the back as a tank regiment passed by waving bottles of whisky and jam. Art!
I was trying to find images of the Teutons in Cannes, of which there are none, so instead I thought I'd show a pictures of the Allies liberating the town, and above you see an M10 Tank Destroyer (identifiable as such by the slanting side armour), which that legendary officer Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart scorned as a 'tin can'. Then, after Art had worked his magic, what did I espy? Art!
YESSSSSS!
In a case of sheer serendipity, Conrad was watching a Youtube vlog by "Military History Not Visualised", none of whose content has come up recently, thank you very much algorithm. He was dealing with the 'logistics' and 'ergonomics' of Soviet and current Ruffian military. I use quote marks because neither is really applicable. What does he have in his end summation? Art!
I cannot reproduce his splendidly-accented English so Conrad recommends you go have a look at one or two of his vlogs.
Which Is It?
Glenn Kirschner, the bald, bespectacled and impeccably well-spoke ex-Federal prosecutor, posts a regular vlog on Youtube called "Glenn Kirschner" with the inevitable tagline " - because Justice Matters".
His most recent - O alright. Art!
Glenn's mocking commentary was directed straight at Donald Buck, because he had sent his lawyers pleading for more time and a reduced payment, which we mentioned yesteryon. Glenn showed a press cutting where DJ Tango had requested that he only pay $24 million, because - well - because - er - trust me bro. Recall, if you will, the invective that Bloated Bafune Biffer Boy directed at Judge Kaplan, all through the trial, to the media and on Truth Social; and now he expects said judge to contort himself into a human pretzel for Trump's convenience?
Don't forget, nine years ago Agent Orange was boasting that he was worth $14 billion with an annual income of $362 million. So paying out 0.6% of that colossal total would be hardly noticeable, would it? Even with the $455 million lumped on top, that would only come to 4.2%.
O EXCEPT HERE COMES REALITY!
The true total is really $2.5 billion. And it's all in property, not cash. And it's all mortgaged or surety for loans. Which is why he's - in the words of one of my favourite aphorisms - wriggling like a worm on a hook to reduce those payments. Art!
And in a British legal case he lost, he now owes the defendant full legal costs of £600,000 or about $750,000. Which will offend his sense of dignity more than his wallet. They'll also have to join the queue.
Creative Conundrums
Sorry, still not come up with a nickname for the Italians.
AHA! The lightbulb of illumination strikes - "The Romans"!
I may have to come up with a nickname for the Romanians, mind you.
What was the Roman name for Romania?
Aha! "Dacia". We've got a winner here, world. Art!
And Another Consistent Content Creating Creature Cavils!
No, I'm not telling you, go look it up.
By now you may be aware that Vladimir Putin is not, in fact, a 4D chess master, and in reality could barely beat a 9 year old at tiddlywinks. As proof I will prod Art into sentience with this steel skewer. Don't worry, I put a cork on the end.
Several Teuton officers of the Luftwaffe - the politically-correct contemporary version, not the one that the RAF gave a right shoeing to - were discussing the facts that they knew British and French soldiers were actually on the ground in Ukraine, helping to operate missile systems. One of them used an unsecured phone, and got eavesdropped by the FSB.
Of course - obviously! - Peter The Average had this trumpeted across all the media the Ruffians have access to, and hideously embarrassed the Teutons, which serves them right. Loose lips sink ships, as do Ukrainian marine drones, after all.
O EXCEPT HERE COMES REALITY!
"City In The Sky"
We rejoin Ace aboard the very same City In The Sky, Arcology One.
CHAPTER NINETEEN: If There Is Something
Arcology’s One’s orbit would eventually bring it back into range of the Doctor’s radio transmitter after several hours, so Ace was startled to be woken from sleep by the device buzzing furiously at her, less than thirty minutes after having lost the signal.
She had been assigned an empty bunk in
So she reluctantly elbowed herself upright,
grabbed the radio and clicked the Receive button.
‘Hello?’ she croaked.
‘Ah! Ace! Splendid!’
‘Doctor?’
The voice was faint and distorted, yet there
was no mistaking that Scottish burr.
‘Yes, it’s me. Alive and whole.
More than can be said for New Eucla. Between flood, giant crocodiles and
alien ray-guns, it’s looking a bit battered.’
The young woman opened her mouth to ask how he
could transmit beyond the curve of the planet below, then shut her mouth
again. He’d managed it; that was enough.
Finally -
An image to go out on, lifted from the BBC News website. Art!
The blurb below says that the number of guard posts has increased from 40 to 6,500, so The Only Fat Man In North Korea is worried about his slaves running away. Because people do not desperately try to get into Norkland. There was that South Canadian soldier, who lasted all of a couple of weeks before begging to be sent to a South Canadian prison as he missed things like food and water.
Laterz!
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