Or, Part 2 Of 'MalCom And Bus Factor One'
I shall recap a little, both to educate yourselves, gentle readers, and up the Word Count, for I am a chap of few morals. 'SISTA' is the Solo Integrated Systems Technical Admin, the only IT person working at Move ENhancement logistical brokerage, or MEN. He had been running IT alone for 7 years before CTOOL arrived. Technically he was the Chief Technical Officer, but our hilariously satirical acronym is Colossal Twod Of Off-putting Liability, CTOOL hereafter. Art!
Eighties sci-fi cover vibes
I put 'CTOOL' in and this is what came out. Don't blame me.
After CTOOL proved themselves to know nothing whatsoever about IT, merely spending money to provide their chums with chances to pimp their businesses, he fired SISTA, throwing $5 at him as severance, and hand-writing a note confirming the firing. Art!
HR react with horror at their legal liability
Ostensibly, the firing was because SISTA refused to cancel his previously approved Christmas leave. CTOOL had not run this past HR nor arranged for any transition period, two major omissions that would come back to gnaw on his gluteus maximus later.
So! SISTA went home and informed his (absolutely furious!) wife that he was now fired. They ignored that salient fact and enjoyed their Christmas break out of state at his parent's house with their children.
Meanwhile -
2 days after his firing, the dispatch server - which I feel like capitalising - the Dispatch Server at MEN crashed, and a self-proclaimed 'PC expert' did a hard reboot of the server, which made things much, much worse. It needed to run through a specific start-up sequence - which nobody else knew apart from SISTA. The process had been documented, except PC Expert didn't bother reading the script. Ooops. Art!
Consequentially, the Transport Management System did not work. When the core part of your business is 'Transport' this is a major flaw. Next day the E-Mail Server crashed. You see, SISTA had the passwords and codes to carry out manual maintenance on all MEN systems, and without him there, or any substitute nominated and trained by him to take over, things began to fail. 'Manual' you ask? why yes because CTOOL had refused automated systems as requested by SISTA.
On day four after his firing, the payroll system collapsed, a week before Christmas. The tracking portal that allowed customers to follow their cargoes failed. The MEN phones began to malfunction, because - you may be ahead of me here - their licensing server had been maintained by SISTA, who was no longer present. Art!
On day five, the carrier payment files corrupted for 300 carriers, who thus were not getting paid. EDI - which SISTA had warned was elderly and needed replacing - failed for 3 major clients. Computers were not talking to other computers, nobody knew what was where or when.
Then the security system began throwing errors. Once again, it had been maintained by SISTA until he was fired. Without maintenance, impossible without the codes he held, the system defaulted to 'Safe' and automatically opened all doors in the warehouse and office complex. Stock was lost to external theft; not internal as staff knew there was a security camera system in place.
Ooops.
By day six of his firing, the Chief Executive Officer, or Number One in MEN, was calling SISTA with increasingly desperate messages. Whom forwarded them to his employment attorney. Art!
This is what happens when you allow an unqualified, inexperienced amateur to interfere with critical systems and whom thinks buzzwords and Powerpoints are the way forward.
CTOOL retained an emergency IT company to come and save the day. They charged $50,000 to just look at the problem and would take at least two weeks to fix it. How's that getting rid of SISTA going, CTOOL? And did we ever find out why your previous start-up collapsed?
What happened next is that costs escalate as penalty clauses from carriers are activated, and the failure to pay staff turns into a State Labour Board complaint. MEN suffers $300,000 in direct losses and $200,000 in indirect losses. Art!
I swear down, this is 'State Labour Board' as per AI Art Generator.
The CEO, by now realising that his buddy-hire CTO is more toxic that a plutonium enema, calls an emergency meeting of the board, investors and owners. They review CTO's documentation and e-mail trail as provided by SISTA, deciding that they are responsible and fire them on the spot.
Coda One: after enjoying their Christmas holiday, SISTA arrives back and solves all the problems in 2 days.
Coda Two: CTOOL tried to fight the sacking. Their attorney looked at the document trail and told them to walk away.
Coda Three: CTOOL is now doing 'sales consulting', or in plain English is unemployed and pretending not to be. Running up a $500,000 debt at your previous employer will do that.
Magyarking
I apologise for those amongst you who neither recognise British slang or the Hungarian for 'Hungary', which is 'Magyar; and our native British sentiment of 'complaining loudly' a.k.a. 'yarking'. Art!
This is the incoming Minister of Health, who does a splendid dance across the stage when Peter Magyar gotten sworn in as Prime Minister. The vatniks are horrified at his cavalier attitude. As others have observed, the number of vatniks squawking across Europe has abruptly fallen since Loser Orban got ousted, making it possible that Hungary was their entrepot into Europe.
We can thank J D 'Judge Death' Vance for 'helping' here, as everything he touches, includrump-friendly European nations, dies on contact. The political equivalent of 'Roundup'.
Is This A 'What On Earth'?
For reasons that escape me, Facebook continues to promote guff that I do not want nor have any ever wanted to own. I've already commented on 'Portable Lumber Mills' and 'Log-counting software' and now we have - Art!
I think they like to reprint novels with a slip-case, so that suckers will pay $75 per volume. Not quite sure what's going on here, apart from matey not being able to bring his overdue library books back again. Yes, I have read it, ages ago, and in fact it may be time to order a cheap paperback copy from Abebooks, because PKD's works do not end up on the shelves in charity shops.
Progress Report
Just to let you know that I'm about 1/3 of the way through 'The Chieftain's 'Myths Of American Armour' vlog from 2015 that I've threatened you with before. It looks like being a long enough annotation to make up a BOOJUM! and a half, so it will probably get split up into bits. Too much of a good thing and all that. Art!
Mr. Moran in person. How he contorted his 6' 4" frame into an M1 I have no idea, still less how he managed it for other older tanks for his 'O No The Tank Is On Fire' emergency evacuation drill.
This Is Definitely A What On Earth
On occasion Your Humble Scribe's brain will function as it's supposed to, despite age and gin, and I remember to get evidence of WOE. Art!
What the Devil's Dog Buns is this supposed to be advertising? Is 'Immunogenicity' a real word? What about 'mNEXSPIKE'? Why is it mostly capitalised? Are they trying to sell me something or just provoke a scare?
What on earth indeed. Bah!
Finally -
Going out with a Biercism.
"Prescription,n: A death warrant."
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