For Lo! We Are On About Stonehenge Today
I did warn you. As one of the most famous megalithic structures on the planet, and as we have been covering megaliths already, it would be remiss of me not to go on about the 'Henge. The word 'Henge' itself is Old English for 'Hanging place' as the locals so dubbed it - hence today's title. This is Chapter 29, since Chapter 28 was something boring like 'How A Flint Knapper Works' or similar. Art!
It's an impressively large structure, built when the constructors used muscle, stone tools, timber and rope to assemble it. No, I can tell what you're thinking: horses were not domesticated in Britain until 2500 BC, and the 'Henge was built in 5000 BC, which means it pre-dates the Pyramids.
Here an aside. But it's an educational aside so that's okay. The 'Henge has lent it's name to other megalithic structures, notably ones made out of wood, which were retro-dubbed 'Woodhenge'. Over the span of 5,000 the timber structures had rotted away completely, so it was archaeological inference that built replicas of them. Apart from one - 'Seahenge'. Art!
Normally covered by the sea, this site has been preserved by being immersed in water. That oddly-shaped object in the middle is an oak tree, except it's upside down and those are the roots you can see.
ANYWAY back to the 'Henge. Art!
'Night Of The Demon' is the British title, which was amended to the more technically correct 'Curse of the Demon' for South Canadian release. The opening scenes feature the 'Henge, and chilly and atmospheric they are, too, filmed in black and white from odd angles with a sonorous voiceover. The 'Henge doesn't really have anything to do with the rest of the film, yet it makes a great backdrop, was free and imbues a sense of ancient times and knowledge. Art!
Another educational aside. Conrad remembers an issue of 'Eagle' where Doomlord is trying to avoid getting scragged by a couple of other deathlords, as he has gone rogue and is protecting humanity, not destroying it. He cleverly stages their duel at Stonehenge, using one of the sarsens to ricochet an an energy bolt to destroy one deathlord. He lat
ANYWAY AGAIN the stones of the 'Henge are of two types, the smaller ones being 'bluestone' quarried in Wales, which is a distance of 150 PROUD IMPERIAL MILES from the 'Henge site, leading to obvious questions about how stones weighing up to 4 tons were moved. No, Vulnavia, teleportation was not involved. Art!
130 volunteers were. Previously it was thought the stones were moved by rollers. In this re-enactment, a greased sled was used, after the stone was levered onto it and dragged by those sweating volunteers. As a proof of concept it worked splendidly, proving that moving the bluestones this was was quite efficient; on the flat or downhill they could average 6 miles per day, and even managed over half a mile on uphill stretches. Go 'Henge builders!
That's the smaller bluestones. The much larger sarsen stones, which weight up to 40 tons, may seem more problematic, requiring an enormous expenditure of effort. Not quite. They were quarried locally and only needed to be moved 30 miles. Hmmm yes, easy enough for Conrad to say 'only' when he's not hefting the things. Art!
Another question people have pondered is how the horizontal stones were lifted onto the sarsens, as they mass, again, up to 40 tons, which is rather beyond the unaided lifting capacity of Hom. Sap. The most up to date theories involve raising the sarsen stones on wooden 'scaffolding' as timber was a plentiful resource in ancient Britain. Art!
In the 1994 reconstruction works, a mock lintel was hauled by ropes up an inclined ramp, to be deposited atop a pair of mock concrete sarsens. The event organisers took pains to use modern scaffolding rather than trust to timber, because ten tons of lintel not crushing anything beneath it is the preferred state of things. Art!
The trusty volunteers are all out of shot to port, sweating mightily. Those people standing under the lintel display a touching faith in scaffold integrity.
The other question of what Stonehenge was for? Who knows.
You Can Never Get Too Much Railway Artillery
So here we are again. The last time Conrad was wittering on this subject, I made a lot of noise about 'Boche Buster' and 'Scene Shifter', enormous 14" artillery pieces that delivered an awful lot of good news to the unfortunate Teutons on the Western Front in the First Unpleasantness. Art!
What's this? How did their calibres shrink by 0.5"? O I thought you'd never ask! The original barrels were scrapped in the Twenties, but someone with either mistrustful eyes on the Teutons or a habit of hoarding made sure that the mountings were kept in storage. Come 1940 and the BEF's rather inglorious exit from Europe, the Admiralty generously gave them 3 surplus 13.5" barrels from storage, which were close enough to the 14" predecessors to be fitted into the old mountings. Thus 'Scene Shifter' rode again, on rails, in the Dover area, where their range enabled them to engage Teuton guns in the Calais area.
Our old and dear friend 'Boche Buster', given an 18" howitzer barrel and deployed for coastal defence, in case the Teutons came calling.
Conrad Is ANGRY!
Pretty much my default state, to be honest. I usually fly into a rage and then find something to direct said Frothing Nitric Ire at, and today we focus on those war criminals of the word of words, Codeword compilers.
CUBISM: How the deuce is one supposed to deduce this one? 'CUBISM' for those unaware, is that ghastly art form as practiced by Picasso and Braque, where they try to replicate art in 4 dimensions simultaneously. Or something. Art!
I'd weep if I looked like you, matey
DYSLEXIA: This one really threw me. I had the 'A' and 'S' and at first wondered if the solution was DYSTOPIA, or perhaps HYSTERIA. Nope. Only my immense wisdom and skill and sheer persistence solved this one. Dastards.
How AI interprets 'DYSLEXIA'
ZINC: Another little swine. How many four-letter words begin with 'Z' or end in 'C'? Precious few!
LUTZ: This one REALLY buzzed my melon. I had the 'Z' as the last letter and was puzzling as to whether it was 'RITZ'. Well, it wasn't and I didn't see the solution until the whole Codeword. 'LUTZ'. What in the everlasting fires of Hades was LUTZ? A variety of polish used by jewellers to keep their stock clean? Famous Austrian 18th century baroque composer? A breed of dog?
Nope. It's so obscure a term it isn't in my 'Collins Concise Dictionary' and I had to resort to teh Interwebz <hangs head in shame>.
'Kingpin'
I know what you're thinking and no, this is not about the villain from 'Daredevil'. I'd never heard of it before one of those Reddit Youtube tails about rage-quitting just when a business needs you more than ever. Art!
This chap quit his 18-wheeler haulage job after being threatened with being fired for insubordination. What was his egregious crime? Refusing to operate illegally and quoting safety regulations at management.
So, he used the type of lock above. You see, the kingpin is the cylindrical component that mates a trailer to the tractor unit. Art!
The kingpin
With a kingpin lock in place, his ex-employers wouldn't be able to move the trailer he left behind with a verrrrrrrrrry expensive freight cargo aboard. Unless they cut the lock off, which risks damaging the kingpin itself. Plus, I bet kingpin locks are pretty resistant to being cut.
He could have added a call to the State Labour Board, who would love to hear about employers trying to break the law.
And with a leap and a bound, or a gimpy hobble, we are done!
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