Actually That Might Be A Bad Analogy
Conrad is unsure if angling has escaped charges of needless cruelty towards worms. Perhaps the RSPCA's more - ah - fringe members are even now cooking up an animatronic, waterproof worm substitute that costs only £50 a throw. Art!
Meet a set of soft plastic worms. Yeah, but the RSPCA one wriggles so realistically!Sorry, I just had to check
ANYWAY this Intro is nothing to do with angling, though perhaps including fishing is not altogether incorrect. For I refer to the very recent decision by an organ of South Canadian government, the House Ways And Means Committee, to release into the wild a set of partially-redacted documents.
Ho-hum, I hear your bored response. Hmmmm, okay, let me just say that these documents are the tax returns of Citizen Trump from 2015, before he was Prez, until 2020, when he stopped being Prez. Art!
A hanky for the Tribble-Topped-Beer-Keg-In-A-Suit
These are the tax returns that Don has been fighting to keep secret since 2016, wriggling - hence today's title - like a worm on a hook. He's gone through every delaying tactic imaginable, apart from dementia or death, and he might have to resort to those when this info gets out.
Don't panic too much about the 'redacted' bit, because the documents have to have any kind of personal reference deleted, because DPA*.
So, what might these records reveal? David Pakman, a Youtube vlogger probably seen as The Radical Left in South Canada, and Slightly To the Left Of Centre in the rest of the world, did an excellent short breakdown. Art!
Dave, possessor of a great Noo Yawk accent
1) He's not as wealthy as he claims to be. Michael Cohen, the sleazy yet amusing 'fixer' for Trump, says that he and others were told by Trump that he wanted to be worth $10 billion, go and see to it. Art!
Mike, possessor of an even better Noo Yawk accent
2) Conflict of interest. Meaning that Prez Trump's relationships with, ooooh, say a foreign power inimical to South Canada might come out. Or his business deals might clash with his duties as Prez. Art!
<lips zipped>
3) Tax fraud. This one is almost guaranteed, given The Trump Organisation's guilt in this area. Art!
4) Abuse of charitable funds. Covfefe Man already has a history of this with hos own charity, which he used as his own spending money. Charity begins at home, right, Don?
5) Hidden assets. Because, you know, Citizen Trump is not known for being honest, open and forthright about anything, ever. Remember how he claimed to have been 'secretly knighted' by HM Queenie? I rather imagine she'd have beaten him black and blue with a sword blade rather than en-noble him.
STAND UP FOR QUEENIE!
Sit down for Trump
No doubt Citizen Trump is weeping into his ketchup-slathered steak at this news, being the victim in his head and vowing that, if he ever gets to be Prez again, David Pakman (amongst others) is going to be first in line for falling out of a window. Obviously inspired by - well, who can say?
Conrad remembers how one of the defendants in the Guinness Trial got off: by pretending to have dementia. Once he got off scot-free, he made a living by giving speeches to businessmen. Citizen Trump ought to get together and compare notes.
Shades Of Liverpool Ballfoot Club
Yes, I can hear you gasping at this invocation. Don't worry, I've not been replaced by a sinister doppelganger; I know about the anthem "Walk On" being the signature tune of Liverpool fans because Sir John Peel was an Lpool fan, and it's on as the fade-out of a Pink Floyd song. Art!
What brings this on? The visit of another Prez, to another Prez. Art!
Prez Z may not be physically big but Good Lord Aloft, does he have testicular fortitude! Only a day before this he'd been visiting the troops in the front lines near Bakhmut, where you can hear incoming artillery while he hands out medals to Ukrainian soldiers. Whilst Peter The Average -
ANYWAY Ol' Joe told Zelly that he - and Ukraine - would never walk alone. This is good news for Ukraine, because South Canada can bankrupt the Ruffians simply by supplying weaponry to Kyiv. Like the very sophisticated (and expensive!) Patriot anti-missile missile system, which has really irked the Ruffians.
On a more tangential approach, this visit to South Canada is a first for Prez Z, since he's been a tad busy meantimes. You can bet that security was tight; the Secret Service and Z's own security details and probably the FBI, with drones and overwatch teams and plainclothes police. Art!
A good bodyguard never looks at their principal, only outwards at possible threats.
"The Sea Of Sand"
Our human fugitives are busy discussing how to warn off anyone approaching the aliens who now hold the FSD at Mersa Matruh.
Sarah shrugged in silent
acknowledgement of the other’s argument.
‘How
can we warn anyone about anything?’ asked Templeman, taking a sudden interest
in the topic when everyone had assumed he was asleep.
‘We
can’t,’ admitted the officer. ‘Not
unless we get north of the depot and intercept them. The problem is that I don’t know which
direction they might come from.’
El
Agheila, Benghazi, Mechili, Tobruk, Bardia, Sollum – half a dozen places
covering a full one hundred and eighty degrees.
‘And
we’d need the Sahariana,’ added Roger, looking again at Dominione. ‘I don’t fancy running into any of those big
glass monsters in an unarmed truck.’
Surprisingly
enough, Dominione was easily persuaded to lend “his” vehicle, with the proviso
that the gunner, Torrevechio, went with it.
Roger agreed, and Corporal Mickleborough drove.
Roger
had a solar compass, a relic of his days at the dig before the outbreak of
war. His plan was to head out of the
wadi, then travel north and gradually curve over to the north-east, either
intercepting the hopefully approaching convoy or at least picking up it’s
tracks and following them. Whilst the
corporal drove he would scan the radio wavelengths for any traffic. Privately he doubted that he’d pick up
anything. The alien’s radio-jamming was
pretty effective.
Their trek northwards amounted to a long, tiring slog across gravel and sand, bogging down in soft sand several times and needing to resort to sand-channels. The sole canteen of water got passed around sparingly.
A solar compass, I should explain, is nothing like the more complex mechanical version, and if I can prod Art into sentience with this white-hot pitchfork -
More Of The 'Bright Lights'
You know, the BBC photographic competition. Art! O stop fussing and put a bit of Sudofed on it.
Courtesy Harri Holmberg. This, apparently, is a lightshow in Stockholm, Sweden, celebrating the life of Alfred Nobel. Yes, that Alfred, the one who is responsible for the Nobel Prize. And dynamite. Mustn't forget the dynamite. Good on the Swedes for not being shy about that, in addition to his creation of the Bofors armament works. If you study any photographs of the Second Unpleasantness featuring anti-aircraft guns, you are sure to find a Bofors 40 mm in there somewhere. Art!
* "Data Protection Act", not "Donald Postures Annoyingly**"
** Although he does.
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