Zoinks! As Shaggy Would Say
Conrad was a tad unsure as to whether he'd do a blog on Christmas Day, but I've got enough background and items for three normal-length posts, so I have to allow this flood of content to be either curated or sluice-gated, depending on which metaphor one chooses. Oscar*!
Hmmmm not sure lava flow equates well with liquid water.
ANYWAY You may recall many months ago I posted clips from the Youtube account of 'Post 10', a South Canadian vlogger who is an unsung hero of his community. Armed with a digital video camera and a rake, he goes about righting wrongs, the wrongs being blockages in water maintenance. Typically culverts. Taking a quick look at my Collins Concise, a culvert is: "a drain or covered channel that crosses under a road, railway, etc." so if these get blocked it can lead to backed-up water flooding the road and/or pavements sidewalks. The only pay Ol' Po gets is the monetization on Youtube. Oscar!
The big picture here is the lower end of a culvert. The inset at top port is Post 10, walking on the ice formed over backed-up water, where the higher end of the culvert has become clogged. Oscar!
Here you see Ol' Po smashing a hole in the ice, then dragging the blockage away with his Mighty Rake. This allows the miniature lake beneath the ice to drain away, and you can tell because the unsullied pristine white ice at the lower level ends up besmirched - not a word you expected to see today - by the dirty upstream water. Oscar!
Watching this kind of blockage removed and seeing the waters flowing freely again is kinda Zen (or 'Son' in Korean). Eventually the force of water - and Ol' Po's boot - breaks up the downstream ice. He states on camera that he'll be back in a few days to check on how the drainage has finished up.
So there you have it, an assault on an icy blockage, which is where today's title comes from.
Motley, I fancy a gin and tonic. Make it with plenty of
Christmas Temporarily Postponed
Darling Daughter and Quiet Tom aren't coming up to visit The Mansion until tomorrow, so the opening of presents won't take place until then, if Wonder Wifey can resist the urge to allow her itchy fingers free reign.
One To Wince At
A department of the Saint-Musse hospital at Toulon was evacuated when a 75 mm artillery shell from the First Unpleasantness was discovered at Accident & Emergency.
The thing was, it was discovered stuck up the rectum of an 88 year-old man, who had arrived to complain that it was impossible to remove.
Explosive Ordnance Disposal experts were called, and confirmed that the shell was inert. Having ensured that the operating room would not blow up and the staff with it, said shell was removed. The patient, who was not named, explained he'd found it at his brother's house. Oscar!
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| 9" of - well, I leave that up to you |
He did not explain how it came to be where it was. Conrad is positive that it was a ghastly accident, because the thought of DELIBERATELY inserting a possibly LIVE ARTILLERY SHELL where the Sun doesn't shine is surely up amongst The Worst Decisions Ever Made. Oscar!
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| The original article |
Aha! Realisation dawns! It was the shell casing that had been inserted, because this whole shell is about 14" long. The medical staff wouldn't have been able to see if the explosive shell itself was present.
It still brings a tear to one's eye**.
Let's Have A Few Bright Lights
Just to get our minds out of the gutter after that last item. Yes, we return to the BBC's photo exhibition on said theme. Oscar!
Courtesy Jerry Olivas. This was taken in Southern California at sunset, with that Michael Bay-filter sky plus traffic and lights in the dusk. Quite evocative, Jerry, give yourself a pat on the back. And - did the local county have a surplus of traffic lights going when these were put up?
"The Sea Of Sand"
I know, I know, not very 'Peace on Earth, goodwill to all men' kind of stuff, skip it if you're feeling that pacific.
As you should so surely recall, the surviving humans from the FSD had ventured into the desert to try and intercept any vehicles coming to see what had happened to the garrison.
After nearly three hours they
spotted evidence of the passage of a large number of vehicles – tracks in the
sand, including what looked like caterpillar treads. They set off to follow, stopping to check
ahead for likely routes the presumed British convoy had taken. Despite losing the trail occasionally on
stoney ground, the Sahariana made good time, catching up with the vehicles they
were following to the extent that Roger could see them in his binoculars.
With
startling speed they caught up with the convoy, Roger realising that the other
vehicles had slowed down.
‘Find
higher ground,’ he ordered Tam. ‘We’ll
see what’s slowing them down.’
That
meant a short detour south-west, leaving them half a mile from the now halted
convoy. Roger counted an open staff car,
three Bren Carriers, five trucks and two armoured cars – Daimlers, he noted,
mounting a two-pounder gun. Thirteen
Corps took threats to their depot seriously.
‘Sir,’
warned Tam, pointing southwards. A
scattered arc of black dots were out on the desert sands, but at such a
distance that it wasn’t possible to know if they were advancing or not. The head of the convoy must have seen their
opponents too, and stopped to decide what to do. The convoy started moving again, just as
Roger decided to try catching up.
Without
warning, a sudden enormous ripple of heat swam upwards from the sands,
temporarily obscuring the convoy in a vast bubble of hot air. When visibility
cleared again, none of the vehicles were moving.
‘Slow
down!’ hissed Roger, not understanding what was happening and not liking it one
bit.
He is wise to be suspicious.
The Answer To A Question Nobody Asked
Because Conrad's temp work involves dealing with - er - 'Mulysatoof' stock, he has come across multiple mentions of a 'beanie' hat or cap.
Having to wait at the bus stop for the 409 naturally leads to pondering the big questions: are we alone, where is Judge Crater, why is it called a 'Beanie'? Oscar!
The only explanation that makes sense is one from Quora, where they say the early versions at the beginning of C20 had a bean-sized button on top to gather all the threads together. I can go with that.
THE TOYS OF TERROR!
The last one from Legal Eagle's list of toys that were too dangerous for children yet which got sold to them. Try this one for size: the "Gilbert Atomic Energy Lab", which was intended to fire children up with enthusiasm for nuclear energy and fission bombs. Oscar!
Right. Kids and small glass containers. What can possibly go wrong?
Nothing terrible, it transpired, because the Lab was pricey, the equivalent of about £500 nowadays, and thus sold only in small quantities. Parents everywhere breathed sighs of relief.
Finally -
Heyyyyyyy sunshine! Dog Buns. We know what that means, don't we, Edna?
* He's depping for Steve, who's on leave and who was depping for Art, who's on leave.
** Laughter or pain, either will do.
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