Thanks To A Rocket-Rigger
Technically there were several such riggers, except you can't rhyme "riggers" because there's no such word as "biggers". We don't usually jib at making up words from scratch here on the blog, but we do have some principles*.
So, tonight we go bottom-first into that memoir of the Second Unpleasantness, "Armoured Guardsmen" by Robert Boscawen, because what I am about to discuss comes almost at the end of the book. Art!
The howlingly ironic "Tulip" being prepped
Boscawen was responsible for getting hold of these rockets and their launch rails from the RAF, and procuring the Brigade's Light Aid Detachment of fitters and fixers, who welded the whole assembly to tank turrets. At first it was just two, one on either side, until they added another two, which improved stability. They were codenamed "Tulip" because deathflower their warhead resembled that particular bloom. Maybe you have to squint to see it. Art!
They weren't especially accurate, nor did they have much range, neither of which were really relevant, since their purpose was as a response to ambushes in close terrain. The Guards Armoured Division (of which Boscawen was a member) were going to be encountering a lot of such terrain as they motored into the land of the Teutons in March 1945. If engaged in an ambush, the tanks would throw flowers, hopefully to the discomfiture of the enemy. Art!
Yes, these were the same HE rockets as used by the Boche-busting brylcreem boys of the RAF. I can't find any decent pictures of the explosions these delicate blossoms make when they go off; trust me, they are huge. Because - quick physics lesson here - the rockets that launch them travel relatively slowly. The HE shells that Boscawen's squadron of tanks fired contained only 1.5 pounds of HE, with the rest being made up of metal, because of the immense stresses placed upon the shell thanks to explosive acceleration.
Planting flowers?
The RP3, on the other hand, was all HE, 60 pounds of it. Thus when Boscawen's squadron ran into an ambush, they replied with over a ton of ordnance immediately. Teutons faced with this kind of response did not enjoy it, one captured officer ranting that it ran counter to the Geneva Convention. Yeah. Perfidious Albion being all - perfidious.
I wanted to share these facts with you, gentle reader, since I have read elsewhere about these rocket-armed Shermans, yet knew little to nothing about the how or why or even where. So now we are all better informed.
Motley! You can be the train and I'll be the Typhoon, and we'll use cricket balls for rockets and four paintball guns for the cannons.
Teetering On The Edge Of Decency
As you ought to know, Conrad has a tendency to clickbait viewers with science fiction magazine covers from the Thirties onwards, which, at least until the death of the pulp magazine industry in the mid-Fifties, needed to adhere to a code about how much skin you could show. Men could be topless; ladies could not. Both genders need their lower portions covered. There could be fighting but NO ABSOLUTELY NO fornication!
Of course, Hom. Sap. being Hom. Sap. you know some artists are going to try and get round these sanctions. Enter Frank Kelly Freas. I didn't dare use this picture as a clickbait intro because - because - well, if you can't tell then you're a robot. Art!
Slowing Down A Little
It can't all be hectic military history and young ladies in swimsuits, we have to moderate things to avoid over-exciting you. Enter more books. Your Humble Scribe has, in an experimental kind of way, moved the big mobile bookcase around and is now able to look directly at - Art!
That's the one: "The History Of The Second Division" because Conrad remembered getting a softback version of Volume 2 of this history, and never being able to find Volume 1. Art!
I don't know whether to pass it on to a deserving cause, or file under bin, especially since I've gone through the whole thing and carefully marked entries and paragraphs in highlighter. Art!
What do these mean? I've got no idea. The past is another country, and I don't have the right visa. Sensible suggestions in the Comments, please.
You Will Have Seen This One Coming
If you were Googling today. Google often has a promotion mentioning someone incredibly obscure, who is responsible for designing the widgets that cause chickens to jump higher in games of cricket, stuff like that (usually less applicable in real life). Art!
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| "Dr. Wu-Lien's 143rd Birthday" |
Doctor Who?
Ah, you knew that was coming. So I'm not going to apologise.
Serendipitous Screening
This afternoon, and I am not sure entirely how, Your Humble Scribe stumbled across a channel on Youtube by "Professor Stick", in which he was taking to task a video uploaded by a Flat Earther. Imagine "How To Cook That" but with spacecraft instead of sponges. Art!
The video was staggeringly stupid, in fact so stupid that Conrad would have honestly believed it was a satire, except the good Professor is familiar with these efforts and - it's real. I shall go back and get a few screenshots to entertain all. Truly, this bloke is living proof of that assertion from Abraham Lincoln: "Better remain silent and be thought a fool, than speak and remove all doubt."
The bloke could multi-task
Conrad used to think the 9/11 "Truth" Movement were the very acme of stupid; well, they may be deposed from that nadir by the Flat Earthers. We shall see.
Finally -
Dammit, Steve! I was looking up a word last night, which I'd only just typed in the blog, and - can I remember what it was? NO I cannot! <sighs> hang on while I check out yesteryon's post -
HIATUS! that was it. Meaning a pause or break in a manuscript or chain of events or circumstances. From the Latin, of course <hacks and spits> "Hiare" meaning "To gape".
There, I think we're all glad that was settled and it didn't cause an hiatus.
Chin chin, all in! We are done done done!
* I think. We did last time I looked, which was, admittedly, several years ago.
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