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Wednesday 9 September 2020

Edgehill

 There Are Some People -

Whom one would not trust with a ball of string and a bar of soap.  They think they know better, and, not only that, that they simply have to push against convention, authority and common sense.  Also safety.  There is a reason why the category "Darwin Award Winner" exists.

     Lest you be unaware of the DAW, let me explain.  There is a website where idiots are nominated for a Darwin, as they render the human gene pool a purer, better place by removing themselves from it.  Some of the stories beggar belief (although excess ingestion of alcohol is frequently a theme).  Take this one, for example.  Art?

Cave Gardens Sinkhole, Mount Gambier, Australia
     You can get an idea of how deep this thing is thanks to the puny humans for scale: at least a hundred feet.  Our DA Winner decided to do a handstand on the guard rail.  His momentum carried him over the edge and that was that.

     Now, please do not be jealous that an Australian has won a DA, because here in This Sceptred Isle we also raise a breed of proud idiots.  Art?


     As you can see, this cliff is *technically* the edge of a hill - bear with me, this is important later - and yes, there's a young lady lying across the gaping chasm, posing for a picture.  The coastguard have warned about how undercut the cliff edge is here, and how it could give way without warning.  Art?

Note how seriously undercut the top is.

     It's a case of when, not if, and nobody would survive a 150 foot fall onto the rocks below.  There are permanent warning signs up about how dangerous it is to get close to the cliff edge, which sense of hazard merely compels the DAW lemmings forward, it would seem.
     Bah!


Edgehill: The Aftermath

No!  Not a giant pile of chalk with some feet sticking out from beneath it <I warned them!>.  I refer, of course - obviously! - to the first major battle of the English Civil Unpleasantness, which took place in October of 1642.

     I have covered the battle itself in outline.  It was effectively a draw, with neither side fancying their chances the next day, so both sloped off, Essex (Parliamentary commander) being neither bold nor bright thus yielding the battlefield to the King, who handily picked up seven Parliamentary guns they had abandoned.  Art?

Not sure which side this lot are on
(It could be this hard to determine same in real life)
     Prince Rupert, whose staple diet seems to have consisted of amphetamine sulphate and rage, attacked the Parliamentary baggage train the next morning after.  Essex, or his commissary, had blundered and it left Warwick last, meaning it was defenceless and easy prey.  There was much plundering and looting and spilling of blood, and most interesting of all, Essex's correspondence in it's entirely fell into Royalist hands.
     As I said, Essex was not the sharpest tool in the box, and had been corresponding with a Roundhead spy in the King's camp, who had been supplying inside information about the King's counsels.  Essex, of course - obviously! - used his real name: "Blake", which allowed the Royalists to track him down and hang him the next day.

"Loose lips sink ships.  Loose pen, hangs men."
     The King here missed his chance, grievously, because when Essex retreated to Warwick, he moved north and Chas One could have marched on London, to the south on open roads.  Fortunately for the Roundheads, he dithered, and was beaten to the capital  - but that is a story for another day.

Bendis Recommends -

I hope you appreciate the work Conrad puts into the list that Brian M. Bendis drew up ages back, sorting through the internet to outline the story, illustrating it with artwork examples, chuntering about whether I like it or not <wallet squeaks in fear>  Yeah, yeah, ignore Mister Wallet.  What's next?

"The After Realm"

     Hmmmm the picture formatting seems a little off.  Might try to redo it.  You may not be able to read the credits there, so - artwork by Michael Oemin, story by Taki Soma.  This looks to be a Norse-saga take on things, with that character above being Oona, an 'elven ranger' (not to be confused with an 'eleven ranger'), who is poking around in the world after Ragnarok, which if Conrad guesses right is the apocalypse by any other name.  So, a post-apocalyptic drama couched in terms of the old eddas - interesting concept!

     It's only been going since earlier this year so no great feedback in terms of reviews yet.  We shall see.  I'm not going to put up another picture as the formatting has definitely gone weird.

Or has it?


Meanwhile, Back In Normandy Post D-Day ...

Yes, another thrilling insight into how the Allies created dozens of landing strips and airfields against the clock and under fire.  First things was, they had enormous amounts of kit to work with; secondly, they had specialised construction 'Wings' (in the RAF) and '"Engineering Aviation Battalions' (USAF) whose job it was to create and then maintain these airfields.  Art?

With puny planes for scale
     That's the South Canadian St. Pierre-du-Mont, which was in action within seven days of being virgin fields.  And you'd better believe if there ever had been a "Mont", the 834th EAB would have flattened it pronto.

     One other interesting aside is how these things were surfaced.  You couldn't just leave them as bare earth, which would erode away under the impact of weather and thousands of aircraft sorties and associated vehicles and even the humble human boot.  So, you could cover it with Prefabricated Bitumenised Surfacing, a thick textile impregnated with tar; this was the pilot's favourite as it completely eliminated the problem of dust.  Art?

Mat laying
     Another alternative was Pressed Steel Planking, which was more robust but which took far longer to lay.  Art?

Also a bit dusty
     Finally there was Square Mesh Track, which was a grid-shaped net of steel wiring.  A lot lighter than PSP, it was easier to handle and lay, but the large gaps in it allowed dust to generate easily.  Art?

More mat being laid
     Dust in Normandy was a serious issue in the long, dry summer.  If you drove a vehicle (on either side of the front lines) you did it slowly, because artillery would be directed on dust raised.  On airstrips dust became a serious visibility hazard when aircraft took off, as well as shortening engine life and affecting wear and tear on other components.  Art?


     That in the above picture is not smoke, it's dust.

     Well, that's a glimpse into the background to events post-D-Day, which had been planned for long before 06/06/1944, and equipped and resourced accordingly.  What Jim Holland likes to call 'Big War'.


Finally -

As you should surely know by now, Conrad likes a bowl of porridge at breakfast.  This is the sort of thing that doctors recommend for diabetics, as it provides a steady release of carbs over a prolonged time.

     However!  If done in the microwave the stuff just keeps on cooking long after it's taken out.  So today I really soaked it in milk, and  - Art?


     Smooth, creamy and most of all, non-claggified! (Conrad's term for over-stodgy porridge).  These small triumphs help get one through the day!

   And with that, gentle reader, we are done.




     





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