My Weasel Is A Dalek, Doctor

Just Getting Your Attention!
   Actually it's a Mechanoid.  What's a Mechanoid?  O!  I thought you'd never ask.

"Can I have the next dance?"

That gives you a sense of scale.  The Mechanoids never took off as a popular Doctor Who villain, which gave their operators a sense of relief: the models were very big, awkward and heavy.  Also they had weedy little arms.

Asteroids:  Keep Off!
     I'm glad to report that a report about asteroids - link here to the mighty Aunty Beeb :

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-25716103

 - warns they may not be commercially viable in terms of mining.  Good!  I'd hate for some snooping human mine-prospecting satellite to come across my means of interstellar travel.  I'm not saying which asteroid it's hiding on, and there are millions of asteroids.

The astronomical equivalent of a garage.

Russia - Riddle Solved By BOOJUM!
     Old Winston* put it well:"Russia is an riddle wrapped up in an enigma inside a mystery".      Well Conrad is here to demystify Russia and the Russians.  All part of that rounded education that BOOJUM! likes to supply, didactically.
     Firstly, remember that winter in Russia lasts for 11 months and temperatures regularly get to -50 Degrees Centigrade, with windchill lowering it further.
     Secondly, Russia is mostly Siberia, which is all tundra and pine trees, with the occasional frozen mammoth (apparently quite tasty when roasted).
     Thirdly, given the above, the vast majority of Russians stay indoors by preference.
     What follows from these facts?  Well, the average blood content of the average Russian is at least 50% vodka, vital in preventing their body tissues from freezing solid.       During the brief Russian summer, everyone has the hangover from Hell.  This explains why invading Russia outside the winter months is a Very Bad Idea, as the locals will tear you in two for making ungodly loud noises with guns or bombs.  Vodka, a word derived from "Voda", Russian for water, flows freely in a river network across Russia, except in summer, when it dries up.  This, in the past, has caused immense armies of Russians to move west, looking for more vodka in the summer, a movement frequently mis-interpreted as "invasions".
     Given the existential bleakness of Siberia, Russians are a gloomy lot.  You would be, too, if the only thing you had to look forward to was a thaw that turned the ground muddy.  Hence you get authors like Gogol and Tolstoy, no stand-up comedy but a big Buster Keaton fan club**.
     Oh, and staying indoors?  If you are rude - and daft - enough to invade Russia and demolish their wooden houses - all their houses are made from logs - they will follow you back to your home and do the same to you, after inviting themselves in to see if there's any spare vodka hanging about.
     There you go, the true facts about Russia!***

The Moscow Corps of Traffic Wardens.  Capable of conquering small nations.

So - Tanks?
     Oh, alright.  Have at this:

A Dada Weeble

It's a German "Alkett Minenraumer", intended to clear mines by boldly - this concept really skirts the envelope - driving over them.  I wonder where they got the crews to test this ugly beast?

And Before I Get Some Tea -
     I've decided that insulting mighty Greek gods is a tiny bit dangerous, especially when they can back up traffic from Manchester to Rochdale.  So, I'm going to pick on Maia:

You look like a girl!  Ha!  Pwnd!

The Greek godess of flowers.  A lot safer to denigrate than Hermes, because after all, what harm can flowers do ...




*  Winston Churchill!  Tch.  The youth of today.
**  He never smiled, you see.
*** "True" in this sense meaning "beyond the truth horizon and waaaay down the rabbit hole"