Came The Frankennuke
Hmmm one supposes that, as usual, BOOJUM! has to stand back and explicate things. Okay, before exploring both of the terms above, we need to establish a baseline<picks up 'Brewer's'>. 'Frankenstein', from Mary Shelley's influential Gothic horror novel, is the surname of the young medical student Victor, who cobbles together a 'man' from bits of dead bodies and animates it with electricity. Things go horribly wrong, of course - obviously! - and the monster turns on it's maker. Art!
We can do no better than to illustrate Frankenstein with one of Berni Wrightson's artworks and one wonders how many hours he spent creating this?
ANYWAY by a process of creative osmosis, 'Frankenstein' is frequently used as the name of the monster itself, so often, in fact, that we now get the prefix 'Franken-' for various motley items. Hence we get the 'Frankentank', a term used of the Ruffians when they cobbled together bits of armoured vehicles because they were running out of proper ones. Art!
No, they were not designed to mount rocket launchers
Case in point. Still, less embarrassing than donkeys, nicht wahr?
Now, allow me to cut back to 'Jake Broe' and his penultimate Youtube vlog, whether you like it or not, since I annotated it. Art!
Source: Euromaidan Press
This was Putinpot throwing his toys out of the pram after France and the UK stated they were up for sending peacekeepers to Ukraine in the event of a ceasefire. Jake theorised that Peter The Average is afraid of responding to, or even mentioning, the South Canadian decapitation strike on Venezuela, so instead he's trying to scare Europe. Art!
Thus we have an Oreshnik strike on the Ukrainian city of Lviv, chosen as the largest Ukrainian city on their western border. You know, next to Europe. This is supposed to be so pant-wettingly terrifying that the collective might of Europe grovels in fear and surrenders.
Except not quite. General Ben Hoges, speaking to Pyotr Kurzin, pointed out that this is performative art rather than strategy, His Ukrainian friends were more worried about Kinzhal missiles rather than Oreshnik, which was originally designed as an anti-ship missile and is not seen as a big deal. It's real payload is a propaganda one, the term 'nuclear capable' being thrown around - what Pyotr mockingly called Putinpot's 'annual theme' as he threatens the West with atomic armageddon each year. Art!
That's CNN reporter Nick Paton Walsh, and he's poking around the innards of the Oreshnik - Ruffian for 'Hazel Tree' - missile fired at Dnipro in 2024. No, Vulnavia, when a missile explodes it is not vapourised, there is always some wreckage to be recovered and analysed. All the more so as neither this one nor the one that hit Lviv were carrying warheads, instead using inert dummies. Which is why the Euromaidan Press headline chided them for being ineffective. Art!
Sound and fury signifying nought From a year ago
This is the missile that Putinpot was bigging up, claiming that it was the next level of ballistic missile technology and it was impossible for The West to shoot down and it could even walk the dog and make you a morning cuppa, shizzle like that. As if he knows anything about missile technology!
Nick, on the other hand, spoke to Ukrainian technicians who very much did know what they were talking about, which is where the 'Frankennuke' jibe comes in. Art!
That's a gyroscope he's pointing at, and Gagarin flew in the Sixties, just to be clear. Art!
This one's a puzzler. For one thing, I very much doubt it's a 'lamp' because I see no reason to have a small light bulb inside a ballistic missile, and Conrad suspects the translation's not all that. On the other hand, it might be a vacuum tube valve, except they were rendered obsolete by 1970 thanks to the transistor. Mind you, valves like that are immune to transient electromagnetic pulse generated by an above-ground nuclear explosion. Regardless, if it's Soviet then it's over thirty years old. Frankennuke, you have earned your name. Art!
Like Conrad!
In case you were wondering, the Cyrillic text on Serhii's cap says 'EXPERT'. Art!
That, gentle reader, is the inert dummy used instead of a warhead. I'm sure there's a joke in there looking to get out.
As is my wont, Conrad did a bit of digging into this cobbled-together Victor Von Frankenstein missile. There have only been 7 launches since 2023, 5 of which crashed and burned en route before hitting their target, an embarrassing fact that the Kremlin avoids mentioning. Since they cost $40 million each, that's $200 million wasted in the most inefficient way to plough a field ever. According to Prez Zed, the Ruffians can only produce a handful per year and have a stockpile of only 20, of which perhaps 3 will be able to actually hit a target.
Well, there we are. I was a tad bothered that we might not have enough for a proper Intro but we did and without padding. Go me.
Thyme Travel
NO! that is not a typo. One of the simultaneous banes and boons of having a mind like a skip with a volume of several million cubic PROUD IMPERIAL yards is that stuff bobs up all the time from the depths.
As yesterday. "What was that book where young adults manage to travel in time, utilising different varieties of thyme?"
Well, Google is your friend. Art!
All I remember is that one of the lads goes rogue and uses commercially available thyme, which causes all sorts of problems thanks to it not being magic. You're welcome.
The Biter Bit
Move swiftly along if you don't want to read more about misery in Mordorvia.
ANYWAY the Ruffian's cannot advance on the battlefield, so their go-to strategy is to try and freeze Ukrainians by blowing up their power plants.
Up until mid-2025 the Ukrainians had stoically sat and taken this punishment, after which date they began pasting Ruffian power plants. Art!
There are now blackouts in Belgorod and Oryol after Ukrainian missile strikes, with 500,000 orcs now experiencing what Ukrainians have for four years. This is on top of lots of previous drone and missile strikes. In fact things are so bad the regional governor of Belgorod is asking residents to leave the oblast and go elsewhere.
That video about an Ukrainian family eating their hamster in frozen darkness is really, really funny now, isn't it?
O just to rub it in - some of the blackouts in Mordorvia are because these power plants are breaking down, thanks to all the maintenance workers being sent off as sunflower-fodder.
Further Frustrations Of The Flabby Fraudster
Just to keep you up to date. Art!
As you may recall, DJ Tango had a hissy fit with the original architect for his ballroom and fired him, doubtless stiffing the firm on services rendered to date. Now another delay has been added, since he fired the original members of the Commission Of Fine Arts, who oversee events like ballroom construction, so he could appoint a few lickspittle toadies in their place and rubber-stamp the approval process. Except the Senile Sepia Sackbut has forgotten to appoint those same minions, hence another delay.
O and the price has now climbed to $400 million. BOOH won't pay a cent himself, expecting it to be paid by people paying bribes contributions and if there's not enough of those, the South Canadian taxpayer will be on the hook for it.
Defeoted
NO! That is not a typo. From the Youtube channel "Actors, How Do You Feel When You Know You Are Working On A Bad Film?" I append this tale. Almost uniquely the poster, 'keystonemoon', names the names. He had been hired by Peter Defeo to write a film script. He describes Defeo as a 'maniac', running International Artist Studios in Philadelphia, and warned other aspiring film people off. Art!
When it got to payment time, Defeo started making excuses, claiming that the studio head, Harold Kushin, was refusing to pay keystonemoon.
The intent was to bully the scriptwriter away, penniless.
Instead they took Defeo to an arbitration court, where a death certificate for Harold Kushin was produced in evidence by keystonemoon , proving that Kushin had died two years previously, long before any work on the film began.
keystonemoon not only got their original money, but also a pile of fines and penalties as Defeo had been caught committing fraud. Tee hee!
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