Constructive Cruelty

Yes, There Is Such A Thing

One person who conducted it on a regular basis was Vlad Tepes, whom you might be more familiar with as Vlad The Impaler.  O what a lad he was.  The one activity he loved above all else was impaling people, and I mean, every man's got to have a hobby.  Art!

     That's a pretty serious moustache statement.  Go on, tell him that his long hair makes him look like a sissy, I dare you.

     ANYWAY at one mass impaling - the trick was not to kill people immediately but have them experience as much suffering as possible, because medieval barbarity* - one of his noble kinsmen protested about the smell, which was A Very Bad Idea because that meant you were indirectly criticising Vlad, a chap with a big ego and a bigger temper.

     So!  He had the noble kinsman impaled, on a stake significantly higher than those of the hoi polloi - to keep him away from their frightful odour.

I'm keeping this small for a reason

     Don't confuse him with Vlad the Impala, who lives at Whipsnade Zoo and is a gentle and lovable creature.  Art!

     ANYWAY Conrad has another tale of torrid <thinks> tumultuousness thanks to Youtube, and a Commentary on another's tale.  These are often just as interesting as the Original Poster's vlog, and this one was no exception.

     Picture the scene: the aftermath of an office Christmas party.  Original Poster is a Designated Driver and thus utterly sober, and has a group of people in his car that he's dropping off, one by one.

     The last person is a - well, let's call her a female, because she was no lady, and indeed probably has DNA from yesteryon's 'Trailer Camp Tramp'.  She makes a play for OP, apparently desperate for a bit of <ahem> rumpy-pumpy, only to be shot down.  OP tactfully neglects to mention if she's hot or not or even if he's straight or not.

     Next day - O what a surprise.  Conniving Female makes allegations of extreme and unwanted and entirely non-consensual hanky-panky.  Because, you see, she and OP are going for the same promotion.

     Ooops.

     You see, OP had internal cameras in his car, and he shared their recordings with everyone who heard the dastardly allegations, which shot the whole sordid saga down in a single morning.  CF was demoted, not fired, and OP got the promotion.

     Imagine OP's relish when CF is assigned to his team.  He won't recommend she be fired, because for the next three years he has her doing all the vilest admin functions there are to be found**, whilst making it seem that these tasks are being equally shared.  I told you, constructive cruelty.  And CF has to suck it up and stick it out since she couldn't afford to resign.  Art!

"You have a 16,000 line spreadsheet to check.  In bright red font on a dayglo green background."

Lord Peter's Crossword

Don't fret so, we're about three-quarters of the way through, and just think of all the interesting Latin and Greek and biblical knowledge you're acquiring!

  Let's look at the next - er - 'clue'.  

     "We heap up many with toil and trouble. And find that the whole of our gain is a bubble (3)."

     Are you ready for the answer?

     SUD

     That is, the singular of SUDS, which is a bit of a cheat, since whomever washed the dishes and found only a single bubble present?

There are 67 here.  Go on, count them!

Apparently I Erred

No!  Not about thermonuclear weapons design - as if!  My temporary employment end date.  Conrad was convinced it was 13/01/2023, until informed that, no, it was 29/01/2023 - yesteryon.  Until, upon enquiring further, it turns out to be 01/02/2023.

     Which means no lie-in on the 30th, and a need to perform ablutions on the evening of the 29th.

     MULYSATOOF you are on notice.

"The Sea Of Sand"

And we whiz back once again to the bio-vore's home planet, dubbed 'Wasteworld' by the Doctor, because it is.

Twenty One:  Boxing Clever

 

Unlikely as it might seem, Farmer Imgelissa had again been paired with Nurbonissa to haul bottled algae.  That made at least a dozen times the duo had been allocated to each other, something that would not normally have been tolerated, let alone repeated.  Allowing a rapport to develop between the Farmers was frowned upon by the Overseers.  Somebody wasn’t paying attention to schedules.

          Imgelissa waited until the sled was well on its way before broaching the subject of Warrior awakenings.  He didn’t want anyone overhearing things, not if it could be avoided.

          ‘So, you’ve heard about Sur petioning for more Warriors to be woken? What do you think of that?’

          Nurbonissa wasn’t stupid or slow.

          ‘One of two things.  Either so many Warriors have been lost in this adventure that replacements are needed urgently, or the target world has such an abundance of resources that more help is needed to cope with it.’

          Imgelissa snorted in disbelief.  More help indeed!

          ‘Can you see Warriors undertaking menial work like collecting minerals or live flora?  If bio-morphic resources were there, we’d be there too, harvesting.’

          “Pillaging” would be nearer the truth, if I were being completely honest.  “Harvesting” is too tame a word.  Target World Seventeen will be drained dry once we arrive in force, turned into a bad copy of Homeworld.

          They dragged the sledge in silence, both thinking.

     Hmmm it seems that things are brewing under the surface, and they're not things that the bio-vore aristocracy would like or endorse.

Conrad Is Unsure

As you should surely know by now, Your Humble Scribe is a very sad man, who spends long minutes in the beer, wines and spirits section of Morrisons, seeing if there are any interesting cans or bottles that might serve to provide blog content.  I did discover one such recently and haven't brought it into the cold hard light of day until now.  Art!

     I have no idea what 'Tiny Rebel' is or was, nor why they chose a numerical title for their ale, unless it was because it's pretty close to 'SOS', which isn't really a positive association you want people to make with your beer.  'Drink this and die!' doesn't really have a lot of advertising merit.

     I'll let you know when I drink it.

I Say Jay

Conrad is unsure if this will work or not, here goes anyways.  You may recall that I was trying to manifest an air of sophistication by looking at early medieval Korean architecture, and failed to find any "Chongnim Temple"?  I suspected the problem might be in translation from Korean to English, so I tried 'Jongnim Temple' and got a few hits under 'Jeongnim Temple'.  Art!

     We even have a puny human for scale!  So glad of that, they've been missing from other architectural posts here.  This site is definitely in Korea and appears to have been constructed in the seventh century AD, celebrating the victory of the Chinese Tang and Korean Silla dynasties over the local Baekje kingdom.  Note that it is made out of stone, rather then the more traditional wood, which is probably why it's still around.  Pretty elegant, hmmm?

     And with that, Vulnavia, we are done.  DONE!

*  European civilisation, hmmm?

**  Probably data-cleansing gigantic Excel spread-sheets.  I've done this and it's miserable.