A Mighty Big Canoe

O Irony, Thy Name Is BOOJUM!

If you've been reading this blog long enough then you'll be aware that Conrad is frequently guilty of sneering at other folks whom O so obviously have too much time on their hands.  Recall the Star Wars ATAT made out of gingerbread?  Yeah.  That.

Now you're just being silly.

     Your Humble Scribe was reflecting that we've not had much in the way of giant Lego sculptures recently, barring a brief flirtation with Lego dinosaurs, and did a quick search for ships, because - well, just because.

     Well, ask and ye shall receive, and then some.  Art?

     Egad, and also Gadzooks! this monster is a 1/35th scale replica of the South Canadian battleship "USS Missouri", coming in at 25 feet long and with 500,000 pieces to it.

The bow

Amidships

The stern

     That party you see assembled on the foredeck is a representation of the Japanese party come to sign the Instrument of Surrender that ended the Second Unpleasantness.  Pretty apparently the Miss served in the Second Unpleasantness, and also the Korean Unpleasantness, and during one of those internecine events in the Gulf.  The word 'Missouri' is a sort of Sioux word that can be interpreted in various ways, and the most apposite one Conrad found was "Those who have dugout canoes".  At 57,000 tons, that is indeed a mighty big canoe.

The 'Mighty Mo' on the go
(at over 30 knots, she ain't slow)

     The Youtube video has the head of Brickmania giving a guided talk of the model, including basic yet vital requirements like being able to fit the partially-disassembled model through an average doorway.  Also, in every move it makes, there is always some repair work needed as bits fall off or get knocked off.  What they'd like is being able to base it permanently in a fixed exhibition, so if you have a very large display space available, let Brickmania know, hmmmmm?

Before

     Motley, nice to see you recovered so well from Acid Paintball.  Do you fancy a bit of Nitroglycerine Paintball?

What Do Ships Float Upon?

H2O.  Lots of it.  Whom do we know who ensures the H2O doth flow?  That's right, post 10.  Normally this superhero unclogs drains and culverts with the Mighty Rake Of <thinks> - I'll get back to you on that.  Conrad saw him tracking down a badly-clogged culvert, where branches and gravel and stones had gummed the entrance.  Art?

      "We have to get in there," states post 10, as unemotionally as that.  "Cool, there's a corner."

     HANG ON A MINUTE DON'T INCLUDE ME IN YOUR INSANE VENTURE post 10 BECAUSE THERE IS NO "WE" HERE MATEY!

     You can't see in the picture above, but the roof and sides of this culvert have a generous sprinkling of spiders.

     "Black widows," observes post 10.

     DOG BUNS BLACK WIDOW SPIDERS?!  That grey blur was me checking out at speed.  As one commenter put on another insane culvert venture, this guy earns every penny he gets from the adverts on his channel.

     After about eighty yards of walking this Tunnel Of Spidery Doom, post 10 finds out he was mistaken.  Art?

"It's a door"

     Yes it is, and a door so heavy our hero cannot shift it more than an inch or so.  It's designed not to move unless there's a huge amount of water pressure forcing it.  So, post 10 ventures back down the Spidery Tunnel Of Doom and then to the other side, where he shows us the door.

    Quick, change subjects before those spiders come back -

Fun With Words

Not to boast, Your Modest Artisan got these crossword solutions and idly wondered where the words came from, because that's the kind of lexicographical (not a word you ever imagined reading today, hmmmm?) anorak I am.  You can make an educated guess that a lot will have Latin roots; there might be others with a Greek origin, and you can always cross fingers that some other, more interesting source like Indonesian or Persian will crop up.

     Anyway -

"Rhizome": a bit of both here.  It's a long, horizontal root that other plants grown from, and it has Greek <dare I say it> roots - "Rhiza", meaning "Root".

"Panacea": Meaning a medicine that cures all ailments, hence a mystery drug that we've not discovered us.  I bet it's from the Greek <checks Collins Concise> Yup.  "Pan" for "All" and "Akeia" for "Remedy".

This would also work

"Nacre": No, Vulnavia, spare your blushes, nothing to do with nudity.  It is the technical name for Mother Of Pearl, and derives from Old Italian, "Naccara" which it seems comes from YES FINALLY! the Arabic "Naqqarah", meaning "Shell".

     How hilarious am I.

     That's probably as much hilarity as the space-time continuum will bear for one day, so we'll move on to new and wonderful subject matter.

A Massive Movie Manipulation

Conrad, as you should surely know by now, likes the films of Stanley Kubrick, probably because rather than despite their tending to be chilly and intellectual.  Ol' Stan, having settled in This Sceptred Isle back in the early Seventies, declined to travel abroad by air, which meant that if he was making a film, it was very definitely going to be made here upon these hallowed shores.  Art?

Stan's pad

     So we then come to "Full Metal Jacket", which is set in South Canada and Vietnam, two locations on opposite sides of the world and nowhere near This Sceptred Isle.  Whilst you might be able to fudge an English location, dress it and have it mimic Parris Island over the Pond, Vietnam is a whole different ball game.  The hospitable South Canadians would probably allow you to film there if you managed to turn up; the Communist dictatorship in Vietnam would not.

     Well, reality, meet Stanley Kubrick. Stan - reality.  Charmed, I'm sure.

     First thing Ol' Stan does is to contact 'Palm Brokers', whom are then under contract to supply palm trees to the number of 200, and to keep them green and alive for nine months.  Ol' Stan not a quick shoot fan.  Art?

     Typically, Ol' Stan knew where every tree went and indeed knew every tree, to the extent that he knew immediately if one had been 'misplaced'.  Palm Brokers, in the absence of any tropical weather, had to irrigate each tree from the top down and used old fire engine pumps to do so.

     Well, I think that's enough verisimilitude for one day.  We shall continue anon!

Ah - Art says these are "old pumps".  
I'll get the Tazer.