Technical Trouble

If You Are Reading This -
Congratulations!  We made it through the night without the robots rising, the zombies amassing or the asteroid impacting.  Being alive is always a good way to start the day.
     Next, I have to apologise for not re-promoting the blog this morning.  Technical troubles, as the title informs.  My "Acer" laptop (an ironic appellation indeed) - Art?

This or close to it

     - decided, in it's spiteful, petty-minded way, to freeze in Power Off mode, which means having to resort to that IT Helpdesk classic, Turning It Off And On Again.  This means a 5 minute delay before you can get back into browser you were in; and another 5 minutes before all the tabs function properly.
     06:56  Realise there's a problem.  Reboot, cast a wary eye upon the clock.
     07:00  Get Browser back.  Cast an ever-warier eye over the clock.
     07:04  Browser tabs running slowly and freezing.  Openly swearing at Acer.
     07:05  Rain curses upon whoever designed this Acer, leave for bus, still swearing

Surprise!  The bus came on time!

     If I'd dawdled or gambled on First being late, as usual, then I would have been standing, lonely, at the bus stop.
     However, you lovely people have been reading BOOJUM! anyway, for which we, the editorial team, are truly grateful.
     This is probably a lot more information that you either wanted or needed, but I felt obliged to put you in the loop, and you're welcome.
     Now, motley, let us get in the hot-rods and race each other!*

But a man can dream ...

79th Armoured Division
I did mention this formation yesteryon, whilst wittering on about Perfidious Albion's armoured formations of the Second Unpleasantness; I hinted that it wasn't your average collection of tanks and scamps, and I shall now elucidate.
     Okay, for D-Day the Allies (although we are going to be concentrating on the British and the Canuckistanians) needed to overcome all sorts of beachfront obstacles, as planned and placed by the nervous Teuton defenders.  Art?


     The above are an example, but you can throw in mines, soft sand, beach walls, anti-tank ditches - you get the idea.
     How to overcome these?  Well, we aren't called "Perfidious Albion" for nothing.  For mines there was the Sherman "Crab", which is a curious name as there is nothing in the nature of cancer about this beast - Art?

CAUTION!  Not to be used as a torture implement.

     The idea is that the flails beat the ground mercilessly, detonating any mines in the vehicle's path, and it worked.  The Sherman above seems to be in a combat zone, as the turret is facing forward rather than backward as it would be in training.
     For soft sand, in which vehicles might bog down, the answer was the Bobbin, which is an extremely apt name.  Art?

Very bobbiny

     The Bobbin above unrolled a carpet of reinforced canvas, which must have worked because that Bobbin hasn't bogged-down; other vehicles would follow on afterwards over the canvas carpet, instead of getting stuck.
     There were more such ingenious contrivances, based on the Churchill tank, which was seen as an especially forgiving and adaptable chassis.
     "Yes, yes," I can hear your excited babble.  "But the '79th Armoured Division' stuff?"
     Ah, yes.  Well, all this specialised armour was grouped together in one division as an administrative measure, because they didn't operate together in a single concentration as other armoured divisions did.
     There you go - your factoid for the day.  And you're welcome.

And this is an Ark

BOOJUM! Reviews Films
Yes, again, do you have a problem with that?  We have a bit of a backlog, that's all, and you ought to remember how we review films here - we make it up as we go along.  Hey, if you want a proper film review, go look up Mark Kermode!**
     Okay, let the wildly-generalised insulting begin!
"Farmageddon": Hey, I do the tacky puns around here!  I bet some panel of Hollywood suits are all patting each other on the back - because you can't do it to yourself - at how clever they are in coming up with that one.  Judging by the fact that it's an animation and the poster's colour palette is bright, it's probably aimed at kids, and attempts to be a "comedy".
     Bah!

So - this probably won't happen

"Abominable": O what a gift of a title.  Your Humble Scribe is pretty sure this one, judging from the colour palette and that it's an animation, is a "Family Fun Film", too.  So, kids, YOU WILL ENJOY YOURSELF!  or else.
     Let me guess - the Abominable in question is a yeti, a creature that does not exist - sorry to burst your fantasy bubble, and it is so so so misunderstood and sad and then it makes a friend with a human child and there's a hunter and an avalanche and Abom (his nickname I just made up) saves the village and ice-cream and rainbows forever.
     There, now you don't need to see it yourself, so that's at least £5 and ninety minutes of your time saved, and you're welcome.

A much, much better film
(though definitely not for kids.  Sorry, kids)

"Doctor Sleep": This does not sound a mile-a-minute-madcap movie experience, does it?  Don't tell me, it's about the history of anaesthesia, or an especially important anaesthetist, or it's the world's dullest film except NO! -
     As the bus drove past me, I noticed that they had added a little insert to the front of the poster, about it being associated with "The Shining", because otherwise you'd have absolutely no idea - unless you can make the intellectual leap from a highly polished object to the important anaesthetist.

Okay, probably not very dozy, but Hey!  A Doctor's a Doctor.
(Also, I would hesitate to name my film collection as being "Rank")

Finally -
I'm going to halt the filmic fol-de-rol right there, as we've cleared a bit of the backlog.  Don't worry, there will be more to come, especially as I've got feedback from a couple of cinema trailers, what ho!

(Of course, the cover had little or nothing to do with the story within)

     Now, back in the day, these snowmen were truly abominable; see that they're trying to do to M.A.C.H 1!  (Man Activated by Compu-puncture Hyperpower).


*  Okay, okay, they're go-karts.  There.  Satisfied now?
**  He's a big fan of The Comsat Angels, you know.  A man of taste.