You May Be Ahead Of Me Here
Especially if you've been following the blog - and according to the lunatic traffic counter, 974 of you have already read it this morning, which surely cannot be accurate? - and our trawling the depths of the word 'Bridge'. Using ST allows me to put up an illo that is pure clickbait. Art!
This, gentle reader, is a proper 'Bridge'. Note it's stark and functional lines, with minimalist chairs, apart from The Big Chair which can surely take off and fly, it has so many controls, and they haven't put in the Battle Scanner either, which Sulu got to operate
ANYWAY please ignore the lack of chair restraints, cradles or seat-belts. I'm sure some eager fan has already explained this absence away, as in 'O the 'Constitution' class starships weren't designed to run into solid objects, that's what shields are for'.
So, that is a proper BRIDGE. Art!
This, I have to say, looks more like a furniture showroom of the future. Carpets? Subdued lighting? Elevator muzak? (guessing at that last one). Infants sitting in on the grown-ups job? Bah! Art!
Yes, these illos are from "The Expanse", one of the few sci-fi shows to get their physics right - the only MacGuffin they have that we don't today is viable fusion energy plants, and even th
ANYWAY the novels make plain that the 'Bridge' isn't that important in ships of this type; what really matters are the Engine Room and the Combat Information Centre, which is what you see in the first illo. CIC not bridge. Conrad rather suspects this mirrors how South Canadian naval warships operate contemporaneously, but don't quote me on that, naval warfare not my strong suit. Art!
From naval bridge to nasal bridge, how punny are we. DON'T ANSWER THAT QUESTION! Let me add in the proper definition, because completist and Word Count: "the hard ridge at the upper part of the nose, formed by the underlying nasal bones". Art?
The corking debut album by The Chameleons. The title comes from a quote by, I think, a studio engineer, whose command of English was not great, and who commented 'What is the script for this bridge?' Conrad suspects that the bridge at lower starboard is the one over the A627 near Elk Mill, and that the obelisk is the memorial at Tandle Hill Park, as the Chams were all local lads from the Greater Manchester region. Which brings us to the next definition.
"Bridge: a passage in a musical, literary or dramatic work linking two or more important sections"
Conrad hasn't the musical nouse to definitely confirm, yet I suspect there are several bridges in SOTB. Art!
Here we continue with the musical theme, and what you are seeing is a guitar bridge, as I'm positive The Chameleons played their bridges on 'Script Of The Bridge' and thus used guitar bridges. More formally it is defined as "A piece of wood, usually fixed, supporting the strings of a violin, guitar, etcetera, and transmitting their vibrations to the sounding board." Art!
This is a 'Dental Bridge', defined as "A dental plate that is containing one or more artificial teeth that is secured to the surrounding natural teeth." The artificial tooth is called a 'Pontic', because dentists like their little Latin puns ("Pons" meaning "Bridge" in <spit hack> Latin), and the real toothy teeth on either side are called 'Abutments', because if it's funny once, it's funnier twice. Or not. Art!
This is Frank Bridge, 1879 - 1941, a British composer of music, primarily chamber music, who also played the viola, which means he had to be using a bridge when he played one. Conrad is assuming violas have bridges, because they have strings. I have never heard of him before - thank you 'Collins Concise Dictionary' for broadening my horizons - and don't think I'll bother looking him up on Youtube as chamber music is far too finicky for my tastes.
Finally for this Intro, I cannot leave anything focussed on 'Bridge' without bringing in one of James Blish's finest creations, the monstrous 'Bridge' created on Jupiter. Art!
For the purposes of scientific research into gravity, in case you were wondering.
I think that's enough of bridges for one day.
"The War Illustrated Edition 209 22nd June 1945"
You may notice a different quality about the illos I'm going to put up from now, as taken of this edition's central page montage section, as they were taken under different lighting conditions. Art!
This was the last fleet engagement between the Royal Navy and the Regina Marina, because the Italians got a proper shoeing, losing three cruisers and 2 destroyers, and were sufficiently chastened that they never sought battle with the Royal Navy again. They were content to remain a 'fleet-in-being' safely in harbour, rather than risk mixing it with the nasty rough British.
I Think A Sub-Editor Needs Chastising
Your Humble Scribe felt aggrieved enough to copy a picture from his news feed, and if Art will put down his bowl of coal -
I must caution you, the "Daily Star" makes a terrific fish-and-chip wrapper of a newspaper, so one cannot expect the journalistic heights and aspirations of the "Daily Express"* or the "Daily Mail"*.
I think what they refer to here is a swarm of insects, not the four-footed horned animal that inhabits the African savannah. Though I could be wrong. Art!
Imagine the sheer unbridled chaos a herd of one million of these would cause, eating anything green and edible, stopping traffic and having courtship fights in the car-park of the local Wildberries.
Nature is telling Charlie Chipmunk Cheeks something.
"Biggles Hunts Big Game" By Captain W. E. Johns
Conrad has started reading this work, and cannot see how the opening chapter, which concerns very high-quality forgeries, squares with the list of illustrations, which include depictions of crocodile-infested rivers in Africa. Doubtless all will be explained. Art!
It was published in 1948 and Biggles, a touch morosely, wonders at the possibility of life on Planet Earth being wiped out by atomic warfare. Conrad doesn't think this was possible at the time, as the Sinister Union didn't acquire nuclear weapons until 1949. Poetic licence.
ANYWAY ANYWAY a bit of background on the organisational aspects of Scotland Yard's 'Special Air Police', which was created out of thin air by the Captain. We are informed in previous works that it is lead by Air Commodore Raymond (whom Biggles first encountered during the First Unpleasantness so pretty long in the tooth by 1948 and definitely aged enough to be a Commodore). Next down the chain of command is Sergeant Bigglesworth, and beneath him the three Constables: Ginger, Algy and Bertie. Art!
This is the edition I had. That sinister black cloud to mid-port is neither smoke nor mist, but locusts, and I thought it rather fitting in a blog yarking on about antelope swarms.
ANYWAY AGAIN, just pointing out that the S.A.P. muster only five men - none of that PC nonsense about women in 1948 <Conrad looks envious> - of whom only 4 go out into the wild blue yonder to render it less wild. They were efficient in those days, you see, and didn't tolerate layers of manglement, or HR, or Business Consultants who wanted to paint all the walls beige, and put in a beige carpet and have a Bring Your Infant To Work Day. STTNG I'm looking at you.
Finally -
My dog-sitting duties commence today, for a good ten days, some of which I'm on leave for. I'm working on Monday, so we'll see how Edna copes with being told not to bark whilst I'm on the phone. What a turnaround, normally it's me crabbing about callers who have their kennel of howling hounds huddled around their phone.
* Tabloids that are the Not-Quite-In-The-Gutter Press.
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