As You Should Surely Know
We here at BOOJUM! have been concentrating on the theme of 'burning bridges', not so much the metaphor as actually river-spanning constructions being set alight. Originally this was going to be a single Intro subject, leading up to a metaphorical description of a Youtube Reddit post, except it turned out to have a lot more legs than I imagined. Who knew! Well, not Conrad. Art!
These stalwart chaps are English archers, who are shooting the living daylights out of the mounted French nobility you can see in the middle distance. There are no photos, I'm afraid, as this was waaaay back in 1346 at Crecy. Just as an aside, note that they have a helmet alone, being absent armour anywhere else, because none of them could afford more. They wear leather studded with metal as a cheap substitute, which also allows them to be flexible and thus shoot freely.
The wooden stakes are there to keep at bay any cavalry that get too close, for horses will not charge into sharp pointed objects, having a certain degree of self-preservation. Note, too, the ready-use arrows stuck into the ground next to them. Don't worry, that's not all they have; part of the English logistics train was wagons full of arrows in bundles, which would be rushed out to them by young lads there for just such a task.
ANYWAY the English victory at Crecy was very much against the run of play, because their army was being tracked by a much larger French one, seeking to bring it to battle. Art!
Edward III sought to cross the Seine to it's north bank, to get away from his pursuers, which was difficult as the French had destroyed all the bridges, including the one above at Poissy. However - ah my favourite word! - as you can see, the stone piers were too massive to destroy. The English rapidly made timbers from local trees, bridged the piers with a few long beams, and scampered across to the north bank.
There is considerably more to the tale than that, which I won't go into here for fear of being accused of making it up, ir gets that intense.
ANYWAY AGAIN, here we are at the Reddit via Youtube tale of an unfaithful wife, and you'll understand about the 'burning bridges' metaphor by the time we're through. Husband, who will hereafter be Perceptibly Suspicious Individual or PSI for short, began to notice - Art!
- what we might call Typical Cheating Indicators on the half of his Burned Bridges Wife, hereafter BBW for short.
1) 'Working late nights'
2) Incredibly possessive and protective of phone
3) New clothes and perfumes
4) A lack of <ahem> conjugal relations
The real River Crossing Construction Set Ablaze moment came when PSI had arranged an anniversary dinner for BBW and a large party of friends, relatives and colleagues. In the middle of proceedings a drunken stranger turned up and lambasted BBW for being at the dinner and not 'working late' with them.
Welcome to Affair Partner Marcus. He really set that bridge alight, going so far as to show dinner guests selfies of he and BBW in restaurants, hotel rooms and other venues when she had been 'Working Late'.
That was the end of the dinner. Later on, BBW's sister texted PSI to say she had suspected Something Fishy was going on. Art!
PSI then got the truth: Marcus was a client of BBW's law firm, where she was a paralegal. The affair had been going on for 7 months.
It gets worse! BBW had been funnelling money from their joint account to fund her affair with Marcus, to the tune of $12,000, which is not small potatoes. Marcus turned up to harass PSI at work, violated a restraining order and got arrested, whereupon it was discovered that he had an outstanding offence of exactly the same behaviour.
Jail for Marcus!
Sacking for BBW! because, as you might expect, law firms take an extraordinarily dim view of their staff doing the naughty with clients.
Here is where more burning bridges came in, as BBW's family were very definitely on PSI's side. Why so? I mean, in cases like this the homeless cheater usually resorts to the Hotel Of Mum And Dad. Not this time. As PSI found out, BBW's had been disowned - by her own parents. In the past she had tried to steal their savings. She had also done over her own sister, who had lost a legal case against her. Art!
When the sister got married, who was invited to the wedding? Yes, PSI. Who wasn't invited? BBW. Who ended up living in her car.
Marcus ended up doing another 3 years in prison for embezzlement, trying to keep his affair partner happy. Very definitely all his bridges burned there!
Without A Bikini On Santorini
Ah yes, the bucolic and tranquil Greek island of Santorini, where one would be better off wearing a hazmat suit with bottled oxygen and a hard hat. Why so? Well, because for those living there, they are living on a volcano, in the most literal sense of the word. Art!
Santorini, whilst still in one piece
What you see here is the remnants of a volcano that erupted in 1600 BC, which rendered property values moot. The island has been stricken with earthquakes of late, causing wiser inhabitants to flee.
Meanwhile a British research ship, the 'Discovery', is poking around the seabed around Santorini, endeavouring to - you may be ahead of me here - discover more data about potential volcanic activity, in order to warn the Greeks. They have an agency that deals with volcanoes and earthquakes, the 'Civil Protection Agency', which sounds like the kind of quango that in the more settled geography of the UK would take up cudgels on behalf of customers mis-sold a meat and potato pie. Art!
This is Discovery's RPV - Remote Poking Vehicle - probing the seabed, which is a fetching shade of Land Whale thanks to the geothermal activity there.
It sounds exciting to be a Greek resident of Santorini! Just imagine the fun they'll have when an eruption is predicted any day soon.
The Statistics Of Sauron's Soldiery
Perhaps that's stretching the analogy of Ruffia as Mordorvia a tad, as Ol' Nine-Fingers was of a tall and imposing stature, whereas Putinpot is more akin to a dwarf in build. He also has an affinity for underground places. Art!
Rather a stark reminder of how Bunker Grandad keeps shovelling over a thousand orcs a day into the meatgrinder, they being the greedy military magpies who want money for service. At this rate they'll hit 1,000,000 total by the end of June, if not earlier.
For those who claim Ruffia is in this for the long haul, they've already had to officially announce their budget being re-calculated thanks to Urals crude oil falling to $56 per barrel, except that was last week, and things move fast in today's world, because Urals crude is now down to between $46 and $49 per barrel, which is perilously close to the cost it takes to extract it from the Siberian permafrost in the first place. Oooops. And also tee hee!
That Spurred Me On
A while back I noticed a sidebar article on my news feed, which mentioned Mount Spurr in Alaska, which was making threatening noises according to the Alaska Volcano Observatory. Gee, don't people in out of the way places have interesting organisations to ensure their delicate epidermis remains intact! At the time I couldn't find a decent picture of Mt. Spurr, a deficiency that has now been remedied. Art!
A cone of contrasts
ALASKA VOLCANO OBSERVATORY DAILY UPDATE
U.S. Geological Survey
Sunday, May 11, 2025, 11:45 AM AKDT (Sunday, May 11, 2025, 19:45 UTC)
SPURR (VNUM #313040)
61°17'56" N 152°15'14" W, Summit Elevation 11070 ft (3374 m)
Current Volcano Alert Level: ADVISORY
Current Aviation Color Code: YELLOW
Unrest continues at Mount Spurr volcano. Small volcanic earthquakes were detected beneath the volcano over the past day. No noteworthy activity was observed in clear satellite views. Clear web camera views showed a small intermittent vapor plume at the summit.
Although low-level unrest continues, no changes have been observed in the monitoring data to indicate that the volcano is moving closer to an eruption. Based on previous eruptions, changes from current activity in the earthquakes, ground deformation, summit lake conditions, and fumarolic activity would be expected if magma began to move closer to the surface. Therefore, if an eruption occurred, it would be preceded by additional signals allowing warning.
Imagine if this kind of monitoring and warning technology had been present at Mount St. Helens before it went bang.
In the case of Ol' Spurry, watch this space.
Finally -
That's all, pilgrims!
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