Or What Used To Called 'Holy Matrimony'
As ever, let us look at where 'Wedding' comes from, and HOORAY! not Roman or Latin for once, the source being Old English STOP RIGHT THERE WE'RE NOT GOING ANY FURTHER BACK THAN THAT 'Weddian', which means 'A pledge', wherein the chap giving the ring signifies that he's pledging he'll carry out his part of the contract. Art!
They're an English rock band who date back to 1985, whom I may have heard on the radio, or not, and that's about all I know about 'em. We will come back to their name, so stick a pin in it and we'll move on. Art!
You may or may not like Ol' Bill, but you cannot deny he has one of the best sneers in rock 'n' roll.
ANYWAY let us continue. No, I'm not going to define the etymology of 'Matrimony', far too much Latin involvement. Now, Conrad's experience of weddings is not great, all the more so since he has reached the age when funerals are becoming more common that people getting hitched, so what I observe here are details gleaned from Youtube's Reddit channels, especially those detailing "Bridezillas".
Here an aside. There is no entry in my "Brewer's Dictionary Of Phrase And Fable" for 'Bridezilla' so a short explication may suffice. It is, of course - obviously!- a portmanteau version of "Bride" and "Godzilla", meaning a bride-to-be who transforms into a jealous, greedy, entitled, abusive, controlling, interfering and overall hideous person. This transformation is usually a complete contrast to their pre-wedding behaviour, and can be so awful that the wedding is cancelled and the bride and groom break up, never to speak to or see each other again. Art!
One of the essentials in a modern marriage is a 'Registry', which, too, is not defined in my 'Collins Concise Dictionary', possibly because it's a relatively recent phenomenon and also because it's an hideous South Canadian invention that will, inevitably <heavy sigh> work it's way across the Atlantic to infest This Sceptred Isle. Art!
You can see the logic of this idea, because the guests invited to the wedding,
Here an aside. One Bridezilla used a Registry of high-value presents that she wanted to receive, yet was incautious enough that she admitted she'd be taking back the presents to exchange them for money. Her guests were a lot smarter - and more malicious - than she was, because she got cheap equivalents or presents with no receipts, hence no recompense allowed.
ANYWAY AGAIN let me first thank Edna, as I came up with this Intro whilst taking her for a walk this afternoon, when the weather still looked forbidding. Art!
A Honda Civic
This is where you get Malicious Compliance coming into play. According to the person relating this tale on Quora, the bride's registry listed that any extortions gifts had to be $500 or over, which is a pretty large chunk of change if you've invited 150 victims guests. Well, the dad of the narrator's friend went out and purchased a 1986 Honda Civic, the value of which came to $550, far less than the normal market value for a couple of reasons: it had no engine and the passenger seat was entirely absent. Ooopsie. Art!
"You can always use Flintstone propulsion"
The bride and groom were, reportedly, not happy. You can see why. Since they would need to hire a tow truck to get rid of it, and pay to have it scrapped, they may well have lost money on the deal. Ooopsie again. And that's the story about The Wedding Present.
Ain't married life wonderful!
More Big Bangs
It seems that Ukraine has switched targets within Modern-day Mordor, going from their petrochemical industry to ammunition depots, because once again a Ruffian storage site has gone BANG.
This is the 23rd Missile and Artillery Directorate storage site. Art!
This site houses only (!) 4 bunkers and 14 warehouses, located at Kammenyi in Krasnodar Krai oblast, and I wonder if it was 'modernised' under the aegis of General Bulgakov, the Deputy Defence Minister of Vice or similar, because - Art!
Not an expert, but to Conrad that looks like a dirty great explosion with countless cook-offs from rockets or missiles. Let me estimate another $20 million-worth of ordnance gone up in seconds, with Ruffians - yet again - being unable to defend against whatever the Ukes are using.
This won't win the war but it will make things much, much harder for the orcs. Putinpot seems to be having a bad weekend. Bring on the buckets of popcorn!
The Incredible Shrinking Fan
With apologies to Fifties black-and-white sci-fi films.
You know who else is having a bad weekend? Putinpot's biggest fan, Donold Judas Trump. The value of his 'Trump Media & Technology Group' stock continues to fall, and quite precipitately too. Art!
Meaning it has lost $65.83 per share since being floated, or about 5/6ths of it's value. This weekend marks the date when those who own the stock can begin to sell it, and no doubt DJ Tango will be looking to sell as hastily as possible before the value falls even further. Thing is, such an obvious dumping will cause the value to tank faster and further. Art!
That's not all the bad news for Pimpkinhead, either. He has failed to pay a lot of venues for his campaigning in 2020, probably because he lost and thus they don't count, or similar piffle in what passes for his mind. This also extends to airport fees, costs for police, security and fire safety, hire of mime artists and Bungo The Clown And His Magic Trousers. Thus he cannot go and campaign in the critical 'Swing States' because of these debts, which makes one wonder if he really is as wealthy as he claims, because what's a few millions to a billionaire? Art!
Courtesy "Verify"
These combine to $965,000 and since three states never responded, the true total is probably over ONE MILLION DOLLARS! Ooopsie.
A Moment's Silence, Please
David Graham, a noted voice actor, has just perished at the age of 99, so he had a pretty good innings, as they say.
Conrad is intimately familiar with his voice, thanks to watching "Thunderbirds" and the Beeb's premier dramamentary "Doctor Who". Art!
"Yiss, Miladee"
He voiced Parker, Lady Penelope's criminal-turned-chauffeur in the Anderson show, and to completely invert the trope of a lovable rogue, Art!
- he also voiced Daleks, the future's fascist fomentors of fratricide.
There was something about a Pig, which I'll ignore for now as I've no idea what the pundits are talking about.
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