All Completely Correct
If a little informal. The Ruffian currency, the ruble (South Canadian spelling adopted for cheap pun reasons) might be now called the 'Centurion' of currencies, not because it smacks of Roman non-commissioned officers or stalwart British tanks of the Cold War era,
Any excuse for TANK
but because it has now hit an unenviable target. I did save a screenshot of this, just to be certain I'd have mockery-material if the original vanished into the ether. Art!
For Your Information, the ruble at this time in 2022 was trading at about 50 to the dollar. So a single ruble is now worth a single cent, and is nearing parity on the cost of a sheet of toilet paper; yes, there is a metric out there measuring the two. Trent Telenko, South Canadian ex-logistics officer, pointed out it costs 0.04 dollars for a sheet of toilet paper (or four cents) BUT he is no doubt comparing luxury triple-ply quilted South Canadian toilet paper, not the sandpaper that the Ruffians use. Art!
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| That's Vanya's monthly wage spent in one go |
What does this depreciation mean for Ruffians and the rest of the world, especially the civilised bits? Well, it's not good, I'll tell you that. The ₽ has lost 62% of it's value in the past 12 months against the dollar and now stands at the worst position ever in the past 25 years, bar the mental spike immediately post-Special Idiotic Operation*. You may respond to that by saying "Mighty Tsar Putin wishes to avoid trading in dollars, and thus so it shall be, amen."
Bloaty Gas Tout can bloviate and bluster all he likes; international trade in oil and gas is done in dollars, the end. Nobody trades in rubles any more. Art!
"Dimya ignored his doctor's advice about risking a stroke."
The has lost 75% of it's value against the Euro, faring even worse than against the dollar. I believe it's now ₽106 to a single €, and the Euro is important because Ruffia imported so much from Europe, meaning that any imports still entering Ruffia are now much more expensive.
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| <blows kisses to Putin> |
When it comes to exports, if they are high in volume, then there is an increased demand for the currency of the trading nation. Conversely, if there is a decrease in exports, then the currency is treated as having economic lice. This is where the ruble and exports stand now; there has been a collapse in trade of 60% which is reflected in the ruble's linked demise of 56% averaged out over the four currencies named above. In a league of world currencies, the ruble enjoys such splendid company as the Turkish Lira and the Argentinian peso - the two worst-performing currencies there are.
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| The consequences of excess inflation |
Inflation in Turkey stands at 38% and a whopping 147% in Argentina. The Ruffians claim 2.3%, but are obviously crossing their fingers behind their back and hoping not to be struck by lightning.
Answers In The Comments, Please
There are more peculiar items going for knockdown prices on "The Daily Beast"'s pages, which Conrad can only speculate upon. Art!
That to port is blatantly a torture implement and doubtless comes with a disclaimer about "CONSENTING ADULTS ONLY" and making sure you sterilise it in an autoclave first. That to starboard? No idea. A Rotary Flanged Grommet Inducer?
Yes, I could just click on the link BUT WHERE WOULD BE THE FUN IN THAT?
"The War Illustrated"
Let us whistle up the cover of Issue 176, for March 17th 1944. Art!
The caption is a little hard to read, so allow Conrad to inform you that these are commandos in training 'somewhere in England' except one of the major training bases was at Achnacarry in the Scottish Highlands.
It's difficult to see clearly here, thanks to the smoke and frankly blurry photography, but these chaps are wielding the new '8.3 inch triangular bayonet', which was more like a skewer than a miniature sword, as the old 1907 pattern bayonet had been. Art!
The spike model was unquestionably a horribly efficient pig-sticker, saving a considerable amount of metal in production. The 1907, however, was calculated to instil the fear of God Almighty into the opposition when they saw the sunlight glinting onto it's blade, and the likely prospect of being in his company imminently.
"City In The Sky"
Ace and the Doctor have had a thorough nosy about the premier orbital space station 'Arcology One' and the Doctor is impatient to be moving on.
There were significant omissions amongst those selected in Arc One: no
military or politicians, no lawyers, no management or consultants. The Wardens were the closest thing to any
kind of armed force, and even they didn’t carry weapons – hence the unarmed
combat.
A call came in on Nat’s Tab, from Virginia Branson. Could Ace meet the Doctor back at the Tardis?
‘Is this goodbye?’ joked Nat, to a rueful look from Ace which hinted at
more than words could communicate.
‘Probably,’ she replied. ‘We tend
not to stick around for very long.’
The Doctor, predictably, bundled her into the timeship without much
fanfare. There were still local
residents watching the remarkably unremarkable blue wooden object after all,
who might be puzzled about how it vanished into nothingness and speculate
endlessly –
Ace peered at the Timelord over the central console. He hadn’t set the controls for any particular
location, instead triggering the dematerialisation circuitry before standing
and looking intensely at the rising and falling rotor, the Tardis’s wheezy,
aged operation running before him.
‘Perspectives,’ he mouthed, barely sounding the words aloud. He looked up at Ace, and his normally
twinkling expression displayed a sombreness entirely out of place.
The young woman cocked her head to one side, wondering if he expected
her to try and fill in the gaps, use her sense of logic and calculation the way
he always nudged her to –
Hmmm interesting to see what Hom. Sap. don't need in terms of survival skills, nicht wahr?
A Photo Begging For A Caption
You may be unaware of a criminal underclass in South Canada known as 'Porch pirates'. These are people who steal parcels delivered to other people's property, which have been left out in plain view since there was nobody in to take delivery.
Firstly, this is a failure on behalf of the courier, because parcels ought NEVER to be left in plain view of passers-by - this is a lesson I learned working at Footasylum over the Christmas period.
Secondly, some pranksters plant booby-trapped packages for these thieves - Mark Rober is the king of these.
Thirdly, sometimes the game's not worth the candle. Art!
This is where he went into the drain, after being spotted stealing the parcel and fleeing across a road, causing an accident. Way to rack up those charges, dude!
Since he proved reluctant to leave, the po-po put a police pooch down the drain, which focussed his attention wonderfully, and here you see him being extracted. Probably not what he anticipated whilst exercising his light fingers.
Finally -
Whilst watching "Ghostbusters: Afterlife" I tried to point my bendy desk lamp at the ceiling, to obtain a more general illumination. Like a comedy drunk, it fell over backwards - and promptly went out.
I know, I know, you quivering craven custards would have immediately sprung for the main lightswitch and called a priest after showering in holy water and hanging a noose of garlic around your neck whilst desperately looking for the silver bullets you put aside for Halloween.
Pshaw! Art?
Still, I'm not happy that I now HAVE to make a constitutional down to Lesser Sodom later this afternoon. In shoes, thanks to the rain.
Later, droogs!
* This and subsequent data courtesy Youtuber Joe Blogs.
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