Criminally Enterprising

A Revisit, Of Sorts
No!  Nothing to do with 'Star Trek' and their "Mirror, Mirror" universe starship.
     Here an aside.  That is one of my favourite ST episodes; however, I don't think a series set in that universe would last long.  Their interpretation of the Prime Directive appears to be "Do unto others way before they get an inkling of doing anything themselves, and if you can't make it permanent, make it hurt."

The Epitomy of rational evil

That space station infested with Tribbles?  Bang, photon torpedo, problem solved.  The two warring planets in "A Taste of Armageddon"?  Destroy one completely to cow the other into surrender.  These really would be very short episodes.     
     Anyway, what I really wanted to talk about was criminals running an entire planet - Tatooine being my example, from another franchise with "Star" in the title.
     Firstly, putting myself in the criminal's place, you'd need to wait - what?  No!  Not "Star Crash" - to wait until the planet had a unitary world government, for severely practical - NO!  Nor "Star Maidens" - practical reasons.

"Star Crash": of course, nothing with Caroline Munro can be entirely worthless.
(Not sure about Christopher Plummer's roast chicken impersonation, though)

     This is because - what?  NO! NOT "Starman" either - "Star Wars", you dullards: "STAR WARS".  Dog Buns, you lot really don't do 'subtle', do you?
<takes deep breath to calm throbbing vein in left temple>

No, Art, no - oh what's the use -

     This is because it would be hideously impractical to try and take over the multiple constituent nations of an entire planet.  Even here on your backward ball of mud there are something like 140 separate nations, so criminals who aspire to world domination need to have either some patience or political clout.
     Now, time to chuck the motley into a swimming pool and hurl globules of Chlorine Trifluoride at it!

Oh look.  Some <ahem> Star maidens

"Wehraboo" Part Two
Lest you be unfamiliar with the term, it refers to fanboys who insist that the Teutons of the Second Unpleasantness were so much better than anybody else that they won the war - except for the minor technical point that they didn't, which makes Wehraboos very cross indeed.  So I thought I'd post a little corrective.  Art?

"I say, old chap, you've left a fearful mess behind."

     This is the infamous Teuton 88mm gun, and I show a destroyed one for a couple of reasons.  First of all, it was designed as an anti-aircraft gun, not as a field gun or anti-tank gun, so it has a very high profile - making it an easy target to pick out.  Second, it was so enormous it came with detachable wheeled bogeys, which needed to be removed before action and re-attached afterwards, meaning it took a while to deploy and just as long to try and skedaddle; add another couple of feet to the above gun's height to get an idea.  When Perfidious Albion got hold of (reliable!) South Canadian tanks that fired HE shells, the life of an 88mm gun crew got - interesting.  Art?

A 17 pounder anti-tank gun, courtesy of Perfidious Albion

     This, as is immediately obvious, has a much lower profile, because it was designed for the purpose.  So, straight away, it's harder to hit.  The wheels are attached to the gun and don't need any mucking about with; thus quicker into action.  It has a muzzle brake, which reduces recoil and reduces wear and tear on the hydraulic systems.  It's shell was one pound lighter than that of the 88mm, but it could fire the frightening APDS shell at 3,900 feet per second, against the 88's humble 2,600.

From Strife To Harmony
Conrad today ventured into Gomorrah-on-the-Irwell for the Gobe Festival, an event celebrating Hungarian music, art and food - there were craft trinkets but I ignored those - all for free entry.  Art?

Dig those diacritical marks, baby!

      Of course, your humble scribe made a beeline for the food stalls, and ended up having that below.  Art?

"Surt Kolbasz"

     Spicy fries, a Big Sausage and the small round green thing is a green tomato pickled in brine, which the lady serving me threw in for free.

     It was a very busy event, with lots of those attending speaking Hungarian, which I take it means that they were Hungarian.  Can't fool Conrad, you know; perceptive chap.
     I did chinwag with a couple of stall owners for a minute, telling them that they were lucky with the weather (hot and sunny), at which the lady agreed: she'd lived in the UK for 7 years and was thus quite well acquainted with our weather.  I also confessed that the English were not well up on Hungarian culture; all we know are Bela Bartok, the biro (after Ladislas Biro) and goulash.
     "Ah, goulash!" they both chuckled.
     Best to go out on a high, eh?

Conrad now hungry

Finally -
There was this ghoul, see -


 - and he met a cop with a laser gun -

 - and now he's -


Ghoul ash.