A Profusion Of Pictures

If A Picture Tells A Thousand Words  -
- then today's blog will be coming at novella length, as there are plenty of pictures. Don't worry, Conrad will also be putting in lots of words, too, depending on what twanged his angry bone today.
     Yes, I know what you're thinking - "Tell us, Conrad, please - what is this curiosity known as a "novella"?"
     I can tell you're not up on your science-fiction.  A novella is a written work shorter than a novel but considerably longer than a short story - but don't go looking for a word-count definition since there isn't one.  Wiki gives several examples of a novella - John W. Campbell's terrifying "Who Goes There" is one, as is "The Crying of Lot 49" by one Thomas Pynchon, but it's only a novella by comparison with his other works, which are loooong.
http://www.goldenageofscifi.info/pdf/Who_Goes_There.pdf
I give you the link to a PDF of the Campbell story, but!  Don't read if you are alone, in the dark, easily scared or all three.  Also not suitable for ten-year old boys with over-active imaginations.

Ivor Novello.  Close enough.

This Is Novel
In the sense of "new", as it obviously isn't a book:

It is in a nook.  Does that count?

     Ah, doesn't it look deceptively lightweight?  Well it's not!  It masses at least 150 kilos and was extremely awkward to manoeuvre up the front steps.  Wonder Wifey has now rearranged the front room around it*.

Oh The Irony
If a dog can sit in a manger, then a cat may sit in a bed.  In this case, a dog-bed:

You're saying "Awww!" now, but wait till the dog arrives

     Actually Edna wouldn't bother at being deprived, she'd use the human bed that adorns the Upstair Lair, since she can now leap high enough to get onto it.

"Human Sacrifice, Dogs And Cats Living Together**"
Here is proof that both species can get on, even if only briefly, when all parties involved are a bit dozy thanks to warm sunlight:

30 seconds later Beej had fled ...

     This beatific panorama only lasted until Beej woke up and realised he had been, if not actually Sleeping With The Enemy, then the next best thing to it.  Consequently he slunk off the table and onto the chair below.

Edna The Impertinent Dog
Our Wunderhund seems a bit out of sorts and has turned her nose up at her dogfood for a couple of days.  "A bit out of sorts" seems to mean, in her mind, "Still up for human food!" as she begged at the table whenever I or WW*** had food of our own.  She didn't get to slobber up the dregs of tea that WW usually permits her, and sulked as a result.  Here we see Edna inching ever-closer to the cup, in the manner that Jenny has when nonchalantly getting accidentally closer to the bacon:

"Just a little bit close ..."

FOOD

Chicken Soup

We dined on roast chicken yesterday, and retained the carcass and left-over roasted veg for stock, subsequently turned into soup today - Conrad being on leave had time enough to manage this.

Anna, look away now -

     Alright, it's not exactly news, I admit.  Still, I took the photo so you can jolly well look at it.  Next!

Sweet Potato And Bacon Muffins
Part of the reason for making soup was that I'd discovered this recipe in one of the Co-Op seasonal booklets (novella length, I'll have you know) and thought it would be a good complement.  Yes, "complement" as in "Goes well with", not as in "Compliment", although Conrad is happy to take any of those that turn up.  Gluten-free, as well.

Nobody has tested them yet - the normal guinea-pig has moved away

Now, Conrad has made these, so even if they taste horrid he is still going to eat them - one of the underlying principles of all his cooking.  I'll let you know how they taste.

Malt Extract
I bought a jar of this substance, to use in making Malt Loaf, I think, and it's been sitting in the cupboard unused since then.  "Excellent on toast" boasted the label, and Conrad took that as a dare.

Malt extract: like Van Morrison (tricky to work with)

     Odd stuff, with a definite taste of malt, and also sweet.  It would probably spoil the taste of tea or coffee if you used it as a substitute for sugar; what the heck, I'll take it into work tomorrow and trial it that way.  As mentioned in the caption, it's difficult to spread as it has the consistency of treacle and generates extremely long strands =

- but it would work well for a cheap special-effect in a horror fillum, and who knows, perhaps this was used in "The Thing" which is a filmed adaptation of "Who Goes There?^"

Coca-Cola "Life"
Conrad doesn't drink the stuff because, being one to ever save his money in order to squander it upon books, books and more books, he objects to paying £2 for a bottle of carbonated water.
     Imagine his delight at seeing a bus poster referring to this loathsome liquid:

<rubs hands before getting stuck in>

     Ah, yes, green text and background.  Green, because green is ecological and we need to associate this drink with things the colour of - rot, pus and gangrene, actually.  "Natural sources" eh?  Well Amanita Phalloides is natural, too, as is Bacillus Pestis^^ but you won't see me gasping to consume either.  It's a very vague term, isn't it?  Why don't they stop being coy and admit what the sweetness comes from?
     It will be interesting to see if this stuff catches on.  BOOJUM! is watching.


Has that made you hungry?  Cookery programmes have the same effect upon me.  Anyway, I have now decided it is Beer O'Clock, so time to doff the keyboard and quaff the beer.

Chin chin!


*  Yes, again. Do you have a problem with that?  Then the exit door IS THAT WAY!
** Yes, I've nicked this from a film, and I'm not telling you which one.  Tee hee!
*** "Wonder Wifey".  Do keep up!
^  See?  Self-referential, that's BOOJUM!
^^ Plague.