How Very Nifty - To Be Shapeshifty

Hom. Sap Has A Long History Of Envying This

I mean a loooong history.  Consider Phlebas - sorry, thinking ahead - consider the mythlogical Greek god Proteus, who was associated with water and rivers and oceans.  He had the gift of prophecy, which is handy, except he was extremely reluctant to divulge said prophecies, perhaps because he thought the future deserved a sporting chance.  So he would shapeshift to escape any responsibility.  Art!

Yes, that's Ben

     If you've not seen the film then you are one step behind Conrad, who has also read Koontz' novel.  "Proteus" is actually a scribbled clue that helps point the few survivors of Snowfield, Colorado, towards the truth.

     One of the more infamous shapeshifty entities out there is, of course - obviously! - The Thing, from John Carpenter's horrifying documentary "The Thing", which is so well known, and so often referred to by the blog, that I only need a single image to illuminate.  Art!

Before

Most definitely after

     You can't tell the difference between the copy of Palmer and the real thing person.

     Then you have the character of Bora Horza Gobuchul, from Ian Bank's first 'Culture' novel, "Consider Phlebas".  Ol' Bo is a shape-changer, there's no arguing that; he can change his appearance to mimic another person (altered gender is not mentioned) but the process takes time, up to several days.  No instant transformations for Ol' Bo, which does create dramatic tension.  Art!

CAUTION! Structure about to be demolished.  Keep clear.

     Then we have the mutable machines.  One that I've mentioned previously is from "Hong Kong Phooey", that being the 'Phooeymobile', which is capable of transforming into different mechanical iterations dependent upon circumstance.  Art!

Finger crossed it doesn't rain, hmmm?

Flight plan?  Radar?  Pshaw!

Helmet?  Getouttahere!

Handy for costume changes

     Frankly, I could fill the whole of this Intro with the Phooeymobile's changes.  I shall be merciful and not do so.  Mind you, I would like to also emphasise that HKP is an absolute Klutz who gets into trouble opening a door.  How did an idiot like him get possession of a technological wonder like the Phooeymobile?  Nor do people seem surprised at a five-foot tall anthropomorphic dog walking around inside the po

     ANYWAY another cartoon car that transmorphed into pretty much anything the script called for hails from "Wacky Races" and is Professor Pat Pending's 'Convert-a-car'.  Art!

Base model

7-league boots variant

Blimp model (helium-filled for safety)

Liquid nitroborane-fuelled (CAUTION! exhaust fumes are toxic)

     One of the more famous shapeshifty machines is one that got stuck in a particular iteration: the T.A.R.D.I.S.  We all know and love it as a big blue Police box though it has occasionally defaulted to other appearances.  Art!

     Doesn't really 'blend in', does it?  Art!

     These are various iterations of the Master's T.A.R.D.I.S. since the Chameleon Circuit on his is fully functional.  Yes, 'his', were not bothering with any of that 'Missy' nonsense  here.

     Finally, we come fill circle back to Greek mythology and the thing that started this whole idea of 'shapeshifty' in my head.  Yes, we are back to "The Aeneid" again.  Conrad is currently reading Aeneas' account of the fall of Troy, and it's a real page-turner, even if I know how it ends.  Art!

     This is Venus.  Why is she involved?  Firstly, because this work is as much about the politicking and plotting and subterfuges of the gods of Olympus just as much as it is about Aeneas and his travails.  Venus did not trust Dido, Queen of Carthage, because Diddy was a protegé of Juno, and there was no love lost between the two godesses.  Secondly, because Aeneas was the son of Venus, having been the result of a liaison between the Goddess Of Love and his dad, Anchises.  Here Aeneas and his fleet of Trojan survivors are, cast upon the shores of Libya and the mercy of Dido.  Art!

     This is Cupid, another of Venus' offspring and a god in his own right.  Venus told him to take on the form of  Ascanius, the son of Aeneas, and meet up with his 'father' in the celebrations Dido had ordered.  Once there, his job was to make Dido inflamed with passion, under the guise of Ascanius, because - and the plot abruptly shifts to the fall of Troy.  I think the general idea is that Diddy goes cross-eyed with lust and is thus easy to manipulate.  All thanks to being shapeshifty!

     Which is where we came in.

"Neuromancer" In Real Life

If you haven't read this sci-fi novel, you ought to make the effort.  It's forty years old this year and the influence it had still echoes.  I can see it sitting in my bookcase from here.  There's a particular cover illustration that I like above all others, and if Art will put down his bowl of coal - 

     It was so popular that a real-world version has been done as well, which I only just discovered.  Art!

     Why bring this up now?  Because there was a Tweet posted on Twitter that I thought encapsulated "Neuromancer" in real life.  I now have to try and track said thread down, so hang on -

     What you might call the 'Drone Ranger', this Ukrainian soldier is using virtual goggles to direct a remote-controlled FPV drone onto Ruffian targets.  Mister Gibson didn't anticipate vaping, though.  That's the sort of thing Philip K. Dick would have imagined if he'd been around longer.

The Ruble Gets Rubbled

As we have mentioned earlier on BOOJUM! the Ruffian economy is having as bad a time of it as their front-line troops are, and it's only going to get worse.  What happened last week is that the South Canadians imposed a swingeing set of new sanctions that led to the Ruffian Ministry of Finance and Central Bank stopping all trade in dollars and euros.

     Oooops.  Art!

     This is the official exchange rate.  What the average citizen of Modern-day Mordor can get at their bank is quite another matter, and they'll have to physically travel to said bank as all on-line banking has been stopped by the Kremlin.  Art!

For all the lucky customers of "Norvik" bank

      Thanks to Jake Broe for putting this illustration up.  You may not know, but prior to the Special Idiotic Operation, Jake's Youtube channel was all about money and investing it, so he has a sound background in understanding what's going on here.

     Now, this is exceptional and not all Ruffian banks are charging in such a gouging manner.  Norvik will give you ₽50 for every $1 you take to them, BUT will charge you ₽200 for every $1 you take from them.

     Putinpot is still insisting sanctions make Ruffia stronger.  He also firmly believes in the Easter Bunny and Grandfather Frost.

"City In The Sky"

The Doctor has been taken prisoner, which is the worst possible thing the Lithoi could have done; you don't escort a prince of mischief into your inner citadel without consequences.

     The more elevated caste-members on duty on the Bridge didn’t realise at first what tribulations were afoot when the TARDIS arrived.  Firstly, the timeship was so far beyond the parameters of the baseship’s sensors that no alarms were tripped.  Secondly, the Lithoi’s arrogant assumption that no human being (or human-resembling being) could threaten them meant no particular worry about patrols or internal security, although the spy circuitry might have helped had they been disposed to use it.  Thirdly, when a critical fault indicator blinked into operation above “Prison”, they didn’t hurry to investigate.  Not until Art’s high-speed incomprehensible gibberish broadcast from the Commissary was followed by barely comprehensible gibberish did they realise subversion was underway and despatch a section of guards to capture the escapees.

     A greatly reduced guard section escorted the sole surviving captive to the Bridge, where the Lithoi looked on with silent amazement.

     ‘Bring it closer!’ came the order, and seven armour-plated guards crowded the Doctor towards their leaders.

     Danger-closer.

Thirteen Years Ago Today -

BOOJUM! began, and here I reproduce in full that first post.  

First post on this newly-created Blog.

I feel like a four-year old riding their new bicycle without stabilisers.  I am, after all, 51 years old and much more familiar with pen and paper - make that fountain-pen and paper - than all this new-fangled digital mummery.

Where were we?  Oh yes, Father's Day.

Drove over to Richard's* to play a pseudo-Franco-Prussian War wargame.  Over the span of 6 hours I got beaten by Andy, playing the French.  Not that he got by cheaply or easily, oh no.  Casualties were high.  And the game turned out to be more balanced than I had first feared; sitting back and crushing the French with awesome Prussian artillery might be historically accurate but my! it would make for a boring game.

*Richard's charming ex-chapel is located in a location so remote it makes The Middle Of Nowhere look like Times Square at rush-hour.

     And with that, Vulnavia, we are done.