Aliens

I Did Warn You Yesteryon

Don't expect an in-depth analysis of the James Cameron opus "Aliens" because we're being a little more high-brow than that today.  Of course - obviously! - mentioning it means I have an excuse/reason/explanation <delete where necessary> to throw in a crowd-baiting picture, or two if we're being especially meretricious.  No.  Go look it up.  Art!

"But there are no strong female characters in sci-fi!" said an idiot

WHERE IS THE APOSTROPHE!

     You see, the BBC led with a sidebar item about the possibility of alien life being out there in the universe.  Well, duh.  Given the sheer jaw-dropping immensity of the universe, it's a given that there's life out there.  Given the sheer jaw-dropping immensity of our own Milky Way galaxy, it's a given that there's life out there, too.  That most of it will be bacterial (or equivalent) micro-organisms is also a given.
     As the article points out in the wake of BOOJUM!'s frequent assertions, 30 years ago Hom. Sap. knew of no other extra-solar planets.  As of now there are over 5,000.  Art!

     Initially technology was only able to detect planets the size of Jupiter, but over those three decades things have marched along to the point where we can detect 'Super-Earth's, and we can confidently expect being able to detect small rocky planets the size of Earth, Mars or Venus within the next decade.  The James Webb Space Telescope has, after all, only just begun operating.  It has already found a chemical signature in the atmosphere of an extra-solar planet that may, ambiguously, be a sign of life.  Art!

Meet K2-18b

     Not a very catchy name, I admit.  The exhalation gases detected are seen on Planet Earth being exhaled by living creatures, so the intent is to check back in a year's time and see if the signature is still there.  It is a genuine possibility that we have just detected the signs of aliens (perhaps only akin to a species of Daphne, but still).  Art!

ART!

Water fleas, a.k.a. 'Daphne'

     Unfortunately for those amongst you whom are slobbering perverts, the prospects of finding exotic green-skinned alien princesses with both a mighty bust and a curiosity about male Hom. Sap. is absolutely zero.  I'm sorry but Hollywood lied to you.

     What I mean to say, before Art earned himself a Tazer at teatime, is that K2-18b sits in what scientists like to call the 'Goldilocks Zone', where water is liquid, not frozen solid or boiled into vapour.  Liquid water is taken to be an essential for life to develop.

     There may be aliens a lot closer than K2-18b, which is 120 light years distant, meaning in the close neighbourhood as galactic values go, yet still waaaay beyond the ability of Hom. Sap. to travel there anytime soon.  Or even any time.  Art!

     Say hello to Europa, one of the moons of Jupiter, which has an icy surface constantly holed and ridged by the suspected waters beneath it.  Although Europa is faaaaaaar beyond the Goldilocks Zone and exists where water would normally be solid as rocks, the hypothesis goes that the ice has been melted by tidal forces created by close proximity to Jupiter, resulting in a subsurface ocean of water that may support extra-terrestrial life.  Art!

<sounds of atomic-powered Tazer firing up>

     Sorry, but Hollywood lied to you, again.  

     Or has it?  In exactly a year from now the "Europa Clipper" mission will launch to go have a nosy at the moon and see if, perhaps, there is life in the briny depths.

     Watch this space*.

Gogol Would Have Loved This

Nicolai Gogol, that is.  He was a Ruffian satirist back when the Ruffians at least attempted to show that they could join the concert of nations; Conrad has read a collection of his short stories and thoroughly enjoyed it.

     To what do I refer?  Why, none other than the current state of police in the police state.  Art!

     There ought to be 920,000 Politsiya, busily grinding their collective boot-heels into the faces of the Ruffian masses -

     Except not.

     The job was becoming unpopular before the Special Idiotic Operation; being exempt from call-up into the meatgrinder kept numbers pegged artificially high at first, but the sense of caution has long worn off.  Apparently, 5,000 police left the force in July.  Not only is it stressful (awww!), it's also rather poorly paid; you can make twice as much driving a taxi or being a bike courier, without risking life, limb and sanity, so ex-officers do.  Art!

GUILTY OF A PAPER BAG!

     One police officer, speaking on condition of anonymity, said he'd started work as a Plod in 2015, since which time 2 more people had joined his team.  On the other hand, 15 had left.  This kind of retention failure, of course - obviously! - puts more strain on those who remain, who are now fully caught up in trying to deal with an epidemic of "Discrediting the military" cases, which often boil down to neighbours trying to settle scores and pay off grudges.

     Tellingly, one officer predicted that "Crimes against the state" will be the wave of the future, so Vanya and Katya are going to have to endure rape, theft, murder, kidnap, assault, vandalism and TWOC.  These have all increased since the prison-sweepings that got a Wagner amnesty arrived back home free men.  Art!

Ol' Nic

     A Policeman's Lot Is Not A Happy One.  Art!

Fly the Fiendly Skies!

Hurrah!  I Think

Right, it looks as if the tracking algorithm on Blogger is back to normal, because I took a Snip of traffic this morning and- Art!

     And as of a few seconds ago -

     Nowhere near as flattering as 587, I admit.  Dealing with the truth does matter, mind.

"City In The Sky"

The Doctor, Alex and Ace have all returned to the surface of Planet Earth, in long-deserted Adelaide, the better to spy out the land and the living.

     Before emerging, the Doctor carefully checked all thirty sensors that read the external environment.  Radiation was up very slightly from the normal background count.  Air-borne pollution had declined to almost non-existent; ultra-violet radiation was down by half, indicating that the ozone layer had been replenished.  Noise – non-existent.

     Quite an attractive piece of real estate, he mused, cynically.  All the better for the alien realtors to sell on to whichever third party had expressed an interest.

     ‘Alex, may I suggest a bush hat before you leave the TARDIS?  You aren’t used to direct sunlight and might burn, and the perspective will possibly knock you off your feet.’

     Ace went to ferret around in a distant wardrobe, coming back with a slouch hat faintly stained with sweat, bearing a faded stamp on the inner liner of which only “Army Issue” could still be read.

     ‘Couldn’t find one with corks hanging off it!’ she said, laughing at her own joke.  The Doctor arched an eyebrow and she turned the laugh into a cough.

     I bet they kept the flies away.  Mate.

My Rock And Roll Lifestyle

Yes, I have to go sort out the clothes in the drier.  That's as exciting as it gets here in The Mansion.  I also gave my small travelling desk a long-deserved clean, and am eyeing the miscellania now sitting atop the big bookcase, to see if I can move them anywhere else and shift the accumulated pile of books now gathering on the floor by my reclining chair.  I suppose it's one of those things that comes with middle-age, like having to watch cheesy murder-mystery television serials on Saturday afternoon.  Art!

About 40 years too soon, matey

Finally -

Hmmm that's me at 2,000 steps so far today, with nary a dog being walked.  Not bad.

*  In about 2027, when the Clipper actually reaches Europa.