Conrad Counsels Caution

To Himself, Lest There Be Any Mistake
As ever, Your Humble Scribe is referring to books, of which he has an immense amount, most especially concerning military history, because I am a bookworm of the classical variety.  Art?

The current book mountain

     Okay, let us abruptly change tack and inform you that Wonder Wifey is off on a cruise next week, which means that Your Humble Scribe will be dog-sitting and on holiday.  No!  Never mention the word "Kennels" in the presence of either Edna (the dog in question) nor WW, or there will be blood shed, and because I am too wise to mention the K-word, it'll be your blood, matey.  I say "Dog", which should perhaps be "Female dog" because one is not allowed to use the B-word about her, since it is deemed to be insulting and vulgar.
     <short pause ensues as I dart downstairs to the kitchen to put tea in the oven>

The article in question

     Normally a period of unsupervised freedom like this would be an occasion for much cackling, pulling of moustache ends and ordering a ton of books from Naval & Military Press.  Not this time, however <makes sad face> because half that pile making up the Book Mountain are from the last purchase, and I'm nowhere near finished yet.  So it would be imprudent to add another 25 pounds (weight not value) to that same pile.  Hence the caution of today's title.
     I can't be bothered to torment you today, motley.  Take a ticket and come back tomorrow, where my wicked and mischievous imagination will once again be in full flow.

The motley was - surprised

The Teuton 8.8 cm Flak 36 In North Africa
SIT BACK DOWN!  This is interesting.  I did threaten you with an article on same after pantificating (like pontificating but with more trousers) about that monstrous anti-aircraft gun, Green Mace.
     The "88" as it was better known amongst the Allies, and probably with a few choice Anglo-Saxon words added to it by the tank crews of Perfidious Albion, was a Teuton anti-aircraft gun pressed into service as an anti-tank gun, in which role it was devastatingly successful.  In service in North Africa, it could knock out any British tank at over a mile, firing an 18 pound armour-piercing shell at very high velocity on a very flat trajectory.  Art?

The article in question

     Make no mistake about it, the 88 was a frickin' terrifying weapon to come up against in a tank that had no way of dealing with it, unless you could close the gap to a few hundred yards.  This was because the British tanks had no ability to fire high explosive rounds; to deal with an 88 (or any other Axis a/t gun) they had to get close enough to hit it with armour-piercing rounds, or treat the crew to a liberal dose of machine gun bullets.

88 in action

     Getting an 88 into action was not a quick process.  As you can see from the first picture, it travelled on a pair of detachable bogies, which had to be uncoupled and removed - visible at rear in the photo above.  The trail legs would then be let down, and pegs that went through them were hammered into the ground, thus making the gun an extremely stable firing platform.  If you wanted to emplace it, then you had to shift about 50 tons of sand or rock, which oft-times was simply not possible.

This, chaps, is half-hearted.

     Things began to change in the late summer of 1942, when Perfidious Albion began to take delivery of South Canadian tanks of wonderful reliability, and which also packed a 75mm gun that fired a great big high explosive round.  Suddenly the 88 and it's crews began to realise that the salad days were over, for a good few reasons.  One: the 88 was literally as big as a barn door, since it had been designed as an AA gun, where concealability was a non-issue, so it made a splendid target.  Two: it took ages to get into action, all the while being horribly vulnerable to HE fire.  3)  It required a great big pantechnicon of a 3/4 track to move it about, which made it an even bigger target.  4)  If it was shooting at tanks, who was going to deal with the Desert Air Force?  This is why you see photographs of the 88 being fired whilst still on it's bogies, and without the trail legs being at ground level.  Art?

Thus

      The recoil and instability immediately made it a lot less accurate, but at least you could bug out at speed, and the noise might frighten the opposition.
     All fascinating stuff, I'm sure you'll agree!

On The Possibility That You Don't Agree -
Believe me, that 5,000 word monograph on "Forbidden Planet and it's Influence On Future Science Fiction Films" will look like a hasty footnote, for Your Modest Artisan could easily write tens of thousands of words on the desert war in North Africa.  Bear in mind that - hang on - the above article is about one weapon, and it takes up 538 words.  

The saner objective.*

     Robbie the Robot seems a lot more alluring now, eh?

Well, that's made my evening!  The lovely Anna has commented on an old post from about 4 years ago that Facebook threw up randomly this morning.  Art?

Anna.  Children in Need makeup, before you ask.

The article in question

     Anna, of course, immediately forgives the dog, no matter that it's just chewed up your limited-edition individually-numbered £1,500 leather-bound gilt-titled copy of "Lord of the Rings" with a special bonus DVD of all the maps -
     Dammit, she's just too nice to disagree with <goes off muttering about dogs stealing your dinner off the plate whilst your back is turned and then looking all apologetic and as if butter wouldn't melt in their mouth>

EDNA!

*  The Comsat Angels "Ju-Ju Money" reference for you there.