Talk Like An Egyptian

Of Several Millenia Ago

Yes, I am spoofing the 'Walk Like An Egyptian" trope that surfaced a generation ago thanks to The Bangles, whom Art has carried a torch for o'er these many years.  Art!

NO! NO GREATER DEFINITION YOU SLOBBERING PERVERTS

     That, Vulnavia, is about as saucy as we get here on the blog.  

   We'll get back to Egyptians WEARING CLOTHES YOU DISG later on once we wend our way back and forth across the usual nonsense that constitutes the Intro.  For Lo! we are now at Chapter 34 of "The Seventy Great Mysteries Of The Ancient World".  Hereafter '70', to preserve my fingers.  Art!

     What's this?   O I thought you'd never ask!  This, gentle reader, is an Irish £10 pound note, the 'Punt'.  Sadly for all fans of punnery it is no longer in use, having succumbed to the irresistible impulse of the rather bland Euro instead.  To translate, 'Banc' - you may be ahead of me here - means 'Bank'; 'Ceannais' means 'Central' and 'hEireann' means 'Iran'.  Only testing, it means 'Of Ireland'.  There you go, Gaelic effortlessly translated.  Irish independence a bit undercut by using the Pound Sterling symbol, which is irredeemably British.  Art!

     What's this?  Another Punt, this variety being a boat.  You may notice what it lacks rather than what it possesses; no engine and no oars or rowlocks, either.  It is propelled by an individual standing on the rear platform, using a pole to push against the riverbed and move it forward, a classic example of Newton's Third Law Of Robotics or similar.  The name is derived from Old English, namely "Shallow boat" which indeed is what it is.  Art!

     There's no rudder so steering must be a bit dodgy, and the punt poler looks in a rather dubious position, given how vulnerable they are to even the slightest bit of wobble.  Art!

     You can tell Conrad is reading this from his 'Colllins' because his knowledge of sports amounts to about the square root of not very much.  A 'Punt' is a type of kick, in rugby and Australian rules football, where the ball is released and kicked before it hits the ground.  I'm glad we got that important technical point explained, it would have haunted me for the next five minutes otherwise.  Art!

     Possibly the best-known variant of 'Punt', this word means to gamble or bet, especially against the bank in games such as roulette or horse-racing. Hence the term 'Punter' for a person given to gambling or betting.  Conrad remembers a rhyme by Hilaire Belloc, from his well-spent you - 

"His Lordship, more grateful, well

Than he cared to tell

Punted the lot on 'Little Nell'

And got a telegram at dinner

To say that he had backed a winner"

     From a rhyme about an inveterate gambler who had to get the Bank Of Mum And Dad to pay off his debts.  You couldn't get away with that nowadays, Gamblers Anonymous would be all over you.  

     You may be wondering where all this persiflage is leading, as am I

      No, only testing, I know where I'm going, which is to loop round again to Chapter 34 in '70' and the title is "Where Was the Land of Punt?' a leading question if ever there was one.  Art!

   This cheerful chappie is Amenhotep III, not to be confused with Amen Corner, and there is a inscription on a stela in his mortuary temple which is worth quoting.

"Turning my face to sunrise I created a wonder for you, I made the lands of Punt come here to you, with all the fragrant flowers of their lands, to beg your peace and breathe the air you give."

     It is a known fact the Egyptians traded with Punt in luxury goods such as gold, incense, ivory and ebony and baboons.  Why baboons?  Why not.  

     ANYWAY all that is known of Punt is that it was south of Egypt, which, given the size of Africa, doesn't really narrow the field.  Scholars have been arguing about the actual geographical location of Punt for centuries. Art!

Mystery solved

     The next puzzle is which route the Egyptians used to trade with Punt.  The options were either travel down the Nile to the 4th cataract and then travel across land, or go via the Red Sea.  There is pictorial evidence of the sea route being taken.  Art!

     There you go, a nice sturdy ship capable of travelling the waters of the Red Sea, rather than the more placid waters of the Nile river; you couldn't take a punt to Punt.  Also, out of shot, any fish shown are marine not riverine species.
     Right, that's enough about Punt.

Can You Bear It?

One form of wildlife that Conrad is not sorry the Allotment Of Eden lacks is the bear.  They were apparently wiped out by 600 AD, which is a good thing as they are large, fast in spurts, can climb trees and get very aggressive when surprised.  Colour me slightly stunned at a Youtube clip where - Art!

     Matey is just sitting, peacefully fishing, and then Bruin decides to join him for a bit of companionship.  Which must have been seven shades of alarming.  Art!

     Fortunately Matey didn't panic, there was no shouting, as Bruin was there for a bit of silent contemplation, not a ruck, or dinner.  Art!

     After pondering the mysteries of the universe, it placidly ambled off, utterly uninterested in the fisherman or his catch.

     I may have goosed the Youtube algorithm.  Art!

     Yes, that is a bear in a hammock.

Remember This Bad Boy?

George Santos.  Art!

     Santos is the one to port.  The one to starboard is Matt Gaetz, a piece of excrement in human shape who left Congress before the Ethics Committee could do to him what they did to Santos.

     Georgy-Porgy got sentenced earlier this year for a whole raft of crimes.  

Santos Filed Fraudulent FEC Reports, Embezzled Funds from Campaign Donors, Stole Identities, Charged Credit Cards Without Authorization, Obtained Unemployment Benefits Through Fraud, and Lied in Reports to the U.S. House of Representatives

     He's a very naughty boy.  He now has 87 months or 7 years to consider his ways.

Yet More Of TANK

There was an elevated platform positioned at random in the display space, which I took advantage.  Art!

 

     From a height you can see the arrangement of the flail arms on the Sherman Crab a bit better, and how far forward they need to be in order to prevent damage to the tank's hull.   

     Another Sherman, this is the M4A3E8, known as the 'Easy 8' thanks to it's redesigned suspension system.  You can see the two turret hatches atop the turret, the hard to spot gunner's hatch and the tank commander's cupola mounted hatch.  The cupola, with it's vision blocks, allows the commander to see - even if in a rather limited way - what's going on outside, without having to risk his delicate and vulnerable head.  You can also see some of the 'clutter' that a tank crew attached to their chariot, thanks to very limited space inside.

The Rumour That Will Not Die

Billy Bonespurs will be crowing about the Gaza peace deal for the rest of his life, on top of the other 79 wars he personally stopped, although the news cycle will move on and focus on other matters.  Art!

     Such as the release of the Epstein Files.  'Moscow' Mike Johnson is preventing the House from sitting for at least another week, because that would add a newly-elected Democrat to the rolls, meaning another signatory to a petition to force a vote on the EF.  Which will come.  It'll be interesting to see how much extra orange the BOOH will need to cover up his pale face when the vote occurs.  Bring more popcorn!

     AND WITH THAT WE ARE DONE!  DONE DONE DONE!