Ha! Sometimes I Amuse Even Myself
Right, let's get down to bronze tacks, which are much cooler than brass ones, and how many ages have been described as 'Brass' may I enquire?
So, in this Intro I am going to be addressing the background to the events described by James Holland in his work 'Burma '44', which is about the rather obscure Battle Of The Admin Box, fought in February of - you may be ahead of me here - 1944. Rather than use James' book as a basis, I have instead resorted to 'The War Illustrated' and Editions 173 and 179. To underscore how obscure this battle was, it is never referred to by name in the magazine, only being mentioned as either 'Arakan' or 'Burma'. Art!
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| Ignorer the shadow! Ignore the shadow! |
This gives you an idea of the terrain being faced by both Allied and Japanese troops: hilly if not mountainous, crossed by tracks not roads, and with very little railway provision. Also covered in jungle, liable to become incredibly wet due to persistent rain, hotching with diseases and with the possibility of wild elephants. Art!
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| An M3 Lee tank. Not to be confused with an elephant. |
The Burma front was always at the end of any list of priorities, and this tank is proof of that fact. It's the British version of a South Canadian tank, minus the machine gun cupola and with a radio bin added to the rear of the turret. It became obsolete in late 1942 when the 8th Army in North Africa got the M4 Sherman, which had a 75mm gun in a fully-rotating turret. However - I do like that word - it was still streets ahead of anything the Japanese had, in terms of firepower and armour protection. Art!
The Nipponese's most numerous tank, the Type 95 Ha-Go, which would have folded up like a tin can if hit by a Lee. Art!
As in Italy during winter, 14th Army used mule columns to traverse jungle tracks and trails, where trucks or Jeeps could not cope with the mud or narrow roads. The blurb to this page mentions the BOTAB, but ascribed it to a location 'Ngakyedaung Pass'. Art!
This montage is from Edition 173 and jumps the gun, rather. You see, the Allies were getting ready to mount their own attack against the Japanese, except the Japs attacked first, so these photos are from the build-up. At top port an officer is reading over information about Japanese casualties, seeking unit identification. At top starboard an unlucky Japanese freight train is being strafed by a Beaufighter. This was a thuggish-looking British twin-engined fighter, bristling with cannon and machine guns, usually also loaded with rockets, bombs or torpedoes. Again, it outclassed any Japanese equivalent but took years to arrive in-theatre.
At mid-port a lance-corporal is cleaning his Thompson submachine gun, a less refined version that mounts a Cutts compensator at the muzzle, to keep down 'climb' when firing. Behind him are two field telephone operators, unwisely shirtless in a jungle environment where malaria-carrying mosquitoes were ubiquitous. At mid-starboard a well-concealed Bren gunner keeps his eyes peeled, and at bottom Indian troops have stopped for that British morale booster to beat the band; cups of tea. Art!
Another of TWI's centre-page montages, which Your Humble Scribe will identify, as that print needs a microscope to read. Art!
Squadron Leader Mehar Singh is explaining away a photo-mosaic his men have taken of Japanese positions. You can tell he's a Sikh because he refuses to wear anything as namby-pamby as a helmet. Art!
A lot of the Indian and British sapper's work was to create roads out of tracks, and to strengthen and widen existing roads, which had never been designed to accommodate wheeled or tracked traffic in any volume. These Bren Carriers are tootling along with supplies for the front lines on just such an improved road, watched by the sappers and a few curious locals. Art!
Lord Mountbatten reviews Chinese troops. Part of the Allies intent to clear Burma of the Niipponese was to be able to resume using the Burma Road to supply China, which was still fighting Japan after seven years. Art!
General Briggs, OC of the 5th Indian Division. Art!
The Allies had several columns operating behind Japanese lines, which were supplied by air, as seen above with a DC3 parachuting in food, medicine and ammunition. This was a resource denied to the Japanese, who lacked the transport capability or sufficient escorts, forcing them to forage or starve.
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| These might have had something to say, too. |
I think we've plundered the TWI archives enough, let us move on to more harmonious matters.
Harmonious For Whom?
I may have already mentioned 'Daractenus', one of the Romanians I follow on Twitter, whose written English is so good he could pass for a native. He loathes two things with a passion: Ruffia and Donold Judas Trump, hence his posting the worst photograph I have ever seen of the Big Orange Oaf Himself. Art!
Conrad, who shares a common loathing of Ruffia and DJ Tango, usually ascribes the insulting nickname of 'Were-toad' to Viktor Orban but I think Dozy Don can lay claim to that name today. He looks about 5 minutes away from an appointment with an undertaker. Perhaps 'Were-Pelican' would be better?
There was that unexplained week-long absence of BOOH earlier this year, with no public appearances, no conferences, no Truths being posted, when people were speculating that he was dead. Pretty obviously not dead, yet once can speculate about myocardial infarction or a stroke and this terrible photo only stokes ghoulish speculation.
Watch this space!
Multiplying Mechanical Misfortune
After a lot of text, let us put up another picture or two on the theme of 'Human Error'. and 'Discover Tech US's montage. Art!
This is the second this clip starts, so they edited out the initial frames that show why these men are trying to restrain a stack of shelving in a warehouse. Art!
One second later, defeat is admitted and they leg it from the shelving. Sound common sense, as it works out, because - Art!
No footage of a dorklift driver hitting the stack, so perhaps an overloaded shelf unit began to give way. That chap in a white shirt had an underwear-changing moment as he makes a getaway. Art!
A dork driving a forklift, what can possibly go wrong? That enlargement at bottom shows that the partition door is partially down, meaning a HARD LIMIT on the height allowed to pass. Art!
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| The term 'HARD LIMIT' is difficult to explain, it would seem |
Props for performing a tricky placement stunt in a forklift, driver. Now collect your P45 and start claiming unemployment benefit.
As Is Now Traditional -
Thank you 'Tank Encyclopedia' for generating content and awakening the world to the wonder or horror of the 'Bob Semple. New Zealand's answer to a tortoise crossed with a bath-tub. Art!
Could it be the Swedish 'S-Tank', the one that's more like a self-propelled gun than a tank? Let me check. Art!
Ah no. It's the T-62, the orcses first smooth-bored gun tank. Which, in the days before computer-controlled gunnery, always missed the target. Way to go, Mordorvia. These dinosaurs are getting a second chance on the battlefield in Ukraine, not bad for a design mothballed <checks rapidly> since 1975.
It's It's The Season For Fountains Of
Over in Mordorvia winter has arrived, bringing plunging temperatures to towns and cities. This is bad news for Ruffians, as their beleaguered and failing sewer and heating systems haven't been maintained for four years, meaning failures and leaks are now inevitable. Art!
A recent event. The Ruffian solution to this is to dig down and uncover the pipe, knock a timber caulk in the hole, and then cover it up again, because there isn't money to cover a replacement pipe, which are not being manufactured any more in 2025. Art!
The above-ground method of resolution.
